complications with girl and my good friend

[too suave]

ok well these past few months there is a girl in my class who i have hung out with to study. we have gotten a lot closer and get along great since we are basically like each other but in a different gender. she has shared embarassing moments and lots of other stuff. its one of those people that are easy to talk to and you feel like you have known them forever even though you havnt. about 2 weeks ago we talked on the phone for 3 and a half hours sharing stories and laughing, etc. whenever we are together i can always make her laugh.

last night she calls me up and asks if i want to go to a party. i am hanging out with my friend so i ask if he wants to come along too. we go to the party and everyone is drinking and she is kinda drunk. well my friend is getting touchy feely with her and near the end of the night after everything was dying down they end up going into the bathroom and are in there a while. now at this time i am outside saying good by to people, etc. time passes and i am basically the only one there just waiting for them feeling like ****.


they come out i give the girl her keys and my friend is all like you wanna get some food blah blah. i asked him about what they did and he said they just made out(whether this is true or not i dont know) when he usually hooks up with anyone i dont give a crap but this hurt since i guess i have more feelings than i thought i did with the girl.

i havnt talked to my friend about this yet but the girl instant messaged me and said

her: i hope that things arent going to be weird between us because of last night...... i'd like to talk to you about it.

her: steve, i hope your like away from your computer because i would never want to do anything to jeopardize our friendship, so call me

so tonight i need to call her and talk about this. should i just spill it and say i have feelings for her or what? this is alreay awkward enough for me and i am at a lost of what to say and do.

 

[Wiesman44]

This is a tough situation you've got here. But here's what I'd do.

First ask her what happened in the bathroom, whether it be making out or more, b/c thats fairly important to determine the scope of things. Then you ask why she thinks she'd be jepordizing the friendship by doing what she did.

Her response is important. Try to determine whether what she's saying is only friendship based, or b/c she has feelings for you. DO NOT spill feelings. Girls don't like that at all.

Sit down with her when your doing this. Chances are you're already been friend-zoned by this chick if she's calling it a friendship, but here's what u do.

When you have the discussion sitting next to each other, if u think she is interested in something more, even if u have the slightest little hint, just lean in and kiss her !

I repeat, do not spill feelings. Kiss her ! This will determine everything. If you spill your feelings, sh#t will hit the fan. Trust me.

 

[too suave]

ok well i am going to call tonight. so i am not going to spill any of my feelings should i just ask her how she feels about me and my friend? cause if so i figure she is going to ask me how do you feel about this. also, if a girl didnt care about me why would she want to talk to me about this? last night when the three of us were leaving i m sure i didnt have the happiest look on my face but we hugged and said good bye along with my friend doing the same thing.

 

[Wiesman44]

you said for yourself that she was quite drunk. THings arent always as they seem when women are drunk. They more easily lose their inhibitions when that happens.

Dude, you need to read the dj bible. OBviously your a newbie to this site. Do not ask her about her damn feelings. You are the prize, not her. Who cares what she thinks of your friend. They are not dating. Act like it never happened, hang out with her, put the moves on her, and see how she reacts. If you dont know how to use rapport, or seduce, then learn from this site.


DO not analyze why this girl did what she did. WHO knows. You are definitely friends by the way you've been acting. If you've been friends for a few months w/o anything sexual, she sees you as purely a friend. You've been put in the FRIEND-ZONE bro.

Does she show any signs of IL, whether it be verbally, or using body language ? If you're not sure if she's interested, then she is not. SImple as that.

 

[flexion_]

I'm not really sure what your question is here. You are her friend - she sees you as her friend.

There is no sexual interest by her here unfortunately. Why are you mad?

This may be hard to swallow right now - read the bible and come back and look at what you posted - you can't be a friend to a woman and expect to be their sexual partner. It just doesn't work that way.

 

[too suave]

well when we were studying last week we pulled an all nighter. there were other people there but they either left after awhile or one took a nap while we were talking and doing work we were leaning on each other and such. i went outside to memorize flash cards and when i came back in she told me what had happened(other girl who lived there brother went to use the bathroom and was surpised to see that she was still there) she first tried to write it down and i couldnt understand it so then the leans towards me and whispers it in my ear and at this time the side of our faces were touching. also during that night she noticed she was touching my arm and shoulder a lot and asked me if she was touchy feely.

 

[strong like bull]

this must be a joke.

-SLB

 

[Wiesman44]

For Suave's sack, i hope it is