Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Complete the sosuave circle (how to make this website work for you and what to avoid)

MindOverMatter

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The knowledge you read on this website, while it will help you a lot towards changing your attitude & success rates with women, represents 10% of your overall game.

The other 90% comes from applying it. It comes from walking up to that girl that catches you eye, and trying to hook up with her. If you succeed, you gain knowledge of what works. If you fail, you gain knowledge of what not to do. Either way, you gain in some way. The more knowledge you get, the better you get at this.

However that's not what this tip is about (as this has been said a million times, but people don't listen). There is a mistake being made by lots of people on this website, that is counterproductive to their game.

Say a new member comes to this website, lets call him Louie. Louie comes to SoSuave in a state of mind where he really does not understand women that well. Whether it's trying to get an ex girlfriend back, or trying to get a date or lose his v-card, Louie is here because he can't understand how girls think. So Louie explores the website. He reads the DJ Bible. He reads the tips forum, the Pook, the Fingers, the Gunwitch, the tips by Allen Thompson on the main website. He reads Doc Love, Bryan Redfield, Louis & Copeland, etc.

He completly educates himself. He learns what mistakes he's been making all his life, and where he went wrong. He learns his basics, his 10%. He now has the right attitude & basics to go out and seduce women.

However, just as Louie is heading off into the sunset to pick up a girl to sleep with, he glances at the Don Juan Discussion Forum, and out of the corner of his mind, he sees threads made by AFCs with titles like:


Girlfriend dumped me, what kind of present should I buy her to want me back
Girl wont return my calls, how do I make her like me
My girlfriend cheated on me, help me write her a poem"


The AFC cluelessness in these threads assaults the Louie's mind. Maybe it's because he sees his old self in those threads. Maybe it's because he sees an even worse version of himself in them.

Either way, he feels disgusted by them, and instead of going out into the world, and learning the 90% of his game through experiance, the guy stays and starts giving the AFCs advice. Not the advice that he himself has learned through life (his 90%), but rather the advice that's already in the bible.

So instead of going out into the real world, learning his 90% and laying girls, Louie becomes Captain Save-an-AFC.

What Louie (and a lot of guys here) do not understand is that you cannot help AFCs with their game until your own game is secure. What is your goal here? To be successful with women, or to play a pretend-therapist?

Go out, practice this sh!t, get laid, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF FIRST, BEFORE YOU WORRY ABOUT OTHERS. Once you learn your 90%, you can help others out, and give them advice that comes from your personal successes and failures, advice that you WONT find in the bible.


DON'T BE LOUIE!!!!

Peace.
 

Brad324

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buy the book "Shut up, stop whining & Get a life"

it has such wisdom as "If your life sucks, it is because you suck." Good read.
 

blue17

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wait I don't quite get the point...are u saying you the bible is much more important than getting experience in the field?

jk
 

Visceral

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I hate being a pessimist, but perhaps this is because the transition from learning to practicing isn't addressed very well here.

The few veterans that actually bother to mention it seem to just assume it will take place.

I don't doubt that this is the case for your everyday AFC, but for the losers on this forum, things are obviously different.

AFCs and losers are different - I have to remember that.
 

FRëSHURE

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ran a search for another MoM post. and stumbled upon this one.

Brilliant.

It gets a big fat BUMP from me.
 

Carnegie

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Ive been at the 10% for a long time now...gotta apply and get the remaining 90% through experience! Good thread
 

BrotherAP

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Bump
 

Jariel

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I must have overlooked this post. Really wise words from you as always Mind which sum up some major problems on this forum!
 

Blackdragon5095

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This happen to me. I used to run around trying to give all the advice I could give. Becoming a therapist. I'm glad that I started a journal and is gonna get serious. :cool:
 

Potbelly

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wow this is awesome. I will sign off until I have a field report to type up. I learn the most from those.
 

LouBrication

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Nice post... but i wish you would've used a name other than LOUIE... lol... i know you're not talking about me... haha... i'm just here to learn, not to give advice... but there is another lou around this forum, i noticed, who seems to have a lot of advice to give... who could that be?
 

Craig Reeves

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It sounds to me like you're saying that anybody who gives advice on this forum shouldn't. I completely disagree with that.

Not to pick at you or anything, MindOverMatter, but the last advice I remember you giving was actually about a year ago to a guy who came here, pretty upset about some cheerleader clowining him about his weight or something like that and you basically told him that he shouldn't approach cheerleaders because they were like better than him or something like that or another I don't remember right now. That's pretty far from what I would call advice, right?
 

DJF or John

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This shyt is good. Because I've felt prey to this and still do at times.

Excellent and priceless.
 

MindOverMatter

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Craig Reeves said:
It sounds to me like you're saying that anybody who gives advice on this forum shouldn't. I completely disagree with that.

Not to pick at you or anything, MindOverMatter, but the last advice I remember you giving was actually about a year ago to a guy who came here, pretty upset about some cheerleader clowining him about his weight or something like that and you basically told him that he shouldn't approach cheerleaders because they were like better than him or something like that or another I don't remember right now. That's pretty far from what I would call advice, right?
No, that is not what I said at all. What I am saying is that after people absorb the information that is given on this site, they should go out and practice their game for a long time before coming back to play therapist to the AFCs. Too many people on the site just read the bible, the tips, and all the info and become an AFC psychologist without ever going out and practicing their game. They feel good that they are helping other AFCs, and this heals their own lonlyness-generated frustration. What they don't know is that their advice is not helping anyone because it's just the rewording of the bible. If they really wanted to help someone, they should help themselves first.

As for me, my advice has always been centered towards inner game and fixing yourself from within to achieve results on the outside. I could not remember the trhead you talked about so I did a search on some of my old posts with the word cheerleader in them and found it (this is the link for people who haven't read it: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=66548&highlight=cheerleader )

I was harsh on my advice, but I don't regret anything I said. Most people felt sorry for the guy because he got shot down for being overweight. I didn't, because I know most of guys would laugh just the same if a fat girl was trying to pick one of their buddies up. Whether some people wanna live in the clouds and believe that looks don't matter is none of my business. I know that they do, and I know how much they affect your game.

The guy in question thought that if he acted like he was a prize and approached a cheerleader, she would see him as a prize based on his act. the reality of it is, a cheerleader on any given day is surrounded by athletes who are in peak physical condition and ARE the prize. Acting like a prize in this case wont do sh!t for him, because she will see through that.

So I offered him two different solutions. Either A.) game girls that are at your level, or B.) improve yourself to the point where you're equal or better then the girls you really want and BECOME THE PRIZE. I think you got stuck up on point A and missed the entire purpose of point B, self-improvement of inner game, and physical self-improvement.
 
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