Somewhat interesting personal case study on competition anxiety that happened in the last three weeks. I'll write out a numbered cliff notes version because I hate writing long paragraphs and am not the best writer as you will soon see. Also, not particular proud of any of my running around with women. I am clearly in the wrong here, but there are lessons here nonetheless.
1. Seeing my girlfriend for about two years now. Shes been my girlfriend for the last year and a half. Very good woman.
2. Another Asian girl enters the picture a few months ago, who I began seeing on the side.
3. At first, no girl knew of the other.
4. One Friday, side Asian wants to come over and cook and hang out, which I agree.
5. Side Asian is on the way to my place, when my girlfriend 'surprises' me and tells me she's coming to my place tonight.
6. I was caught off guard, and came up with some lame excuse as to why girlfriend cannot come tonight. She says, its fine, you won't even know im there, ill see you in an hour! Sh#t.
7. I call Asian side girl and come up with a ridiculous story as to why she needs to turn around and go back. I'm fine but got into a car accident! And need to deal with that. ( I know, ridiculous).
8. Asian side girl buys my story for a little and says okay, I will pick you up! Finally, I realize I am fu##ed and admit to her that I am lying and I have a girlfriend. I apologize. She's not amused.
9. Side girlfriend calls me 10 minutes later and cries and says, you don't want to be with me? I say honestly, no, I need to go back to my girlfriend. She tells me "I will still come over there to see you, its okay" I say NO, my girlfriend is coming now. I can't mess this up. She says I want to still see you if you leave your girlfriend. I tell her NO, I am staying with girlfriend and I am sorry. Please do not come here and wreck this. I am sorry and I f**ed up. She called me the next two days, until I finally told her You need to STOP.
10. Fast forward two weeks (yesterday) Girlfriend is cleaning my place for me while I am out. She goes through my journal! She reads about this other girl, learns her name.
11. When I get back to my place. She is PISSED. She says she read my journal (strange I know- I have a journal of 10+ years where I just right about whats happing in life and business) and found the name of side Asian girl. Do you have another girlfriend?! I say What are you talking about? She says just tell me if you have another girlfriend or are you seeing someone else?! Come clean! I say no, where do you get this stuff? Somehow, I work myself out of the grilling and I tell her yes, I went on a date, nothing happened though. At this point, I'm sure its over.
12. Remarkably, girlfriend does not call it off with me and becomes even more clingy to me over the next hours and day. It lit some kind of spark in her. Note- she was always a good girlfriend, but lately been even more 'caring' after finding out about other girl. And asks who is she? What does she look like? Is she prettier than me? Am I not good in bed for you?...
Anyway, Im sure there are takeaways from this.
1. Seeing my girlfriend for about two years now. Shes been my girlfriend for the last year and a half. Very good woman.
2. Another Asian girl enters the picture a few months ago, who I began seeing on the side.
3. At first, no girl knew of the other.
4. One Friday, side Asian wants to come over and cook and hang out, which I agree.
5. Side Asian is on the way to my place, when my girlfriend 'surprises' me and tells me she's coming to my place tonight.
6. I was caught off guard, and came up with some lame excuse as to why girlfriend cannot come tonight. She says, its fine, you won't even know im there, ill see you in an hour! Sh#t.
7. I call Asian side girl and come up with a ridiculous story as to why she needs to turn around and go back. I'm fine but got into a car accident! And need to deal with that. ( I know, ridiculous).
8. Asian side girl buys my story for a little and says okay, I will pick you up! Finally, I realize I am fu##ed and admit to her that I am lying and I have a girlfriend. I apologize. She's not amused.
9. Side girlfriend calls me 10 minutes later and cries and says, you don't want to be with me? I say honestly, no, I need to go back to my girlfriend. She tells me "I will still come over there to see you, its okay" I say NO, my girlfriend is coming now. I can't mess this up. She says I want to still see you if you leave your girlfriend. I tell her NO, I am staying with girlfriend and I am sorry. Please do not come here and wreck this. I am sorry and I f**ed up. She called me the next two days, until I finally told her You need to STOP.
10. Fast forward two weeks (yesterday) Girlfriend is cleaning my place for me while I am out. She goes through my journal! She reads about this other girl, learns her name.
11. When I get back to my place. She is PISSED. She says she read my journal (strange I know- I have a journal of 10+ years where I just right about whats happing in life and business) and found the name of side Asian girl. Do you have another girlfriend?! I say What are you talking about? She says just tell me if you have another girlfriend or are you seeing someone else?! Come clean! I say no, where do you get this stuff? Somehow, I work myself out of the grilling and I tell her yes, I went on a date, nothing happened though. At this point, I'm sure its over.
12. Remarkably, girlfriend does not call it off with me and becomes even more clingy to me over the next hours and day. It lit some kind of spark in her. Note- she was always a good girlfriend, but lately been even more 'caring' after finding out about other girl. And asks who is she? What does she look like? Is she prettier than me? Am I not good in bed for you?...
Anyway, Im sure there are takeaways from this.
