communication coach

[tristan22]

I'm wondering if anyone on this site has ever visitied a communications coach, to help them find and master their social, physical and communicative faults?

The cliche statement of "i'm so good looking" is so abundant these days, it's hard to say it, and have people you have never personally met take you seriously. Anyways, i am a pretty good looking guy, yet I strike out religiously with women! I know i should be getting my fair share of women, but i don't. Sometimes i wish i was average looking, b/c they seem to be landing all of the girls.

Obviously i'm giving off some sort of displeasing vibe or i would be having much better luck. I'm starting to think i'm charles manson or ted bundy or something, but heck even they were landing chics!

My situation is just not normal. I don't really know what else to do. Any suggestions or feedback would be greatly appreciated!


Tristan

 

[WestCoaster]

Couple resources for you

First resource is the DJ Bootcamp. I never went through it, but I'm amazed at the results of it by some posters here. I glanced at it and it's very interesting. It's like going to a sports camp: you learn the fundamentals first.

You start by establishing eye contact with people.
You move on to saying hi to everyone, trying to build confidence and getting 'hi's' in return.
You move on to saying hi to women.
You move on to getting in conversations with women.
You move on to really meeting women.
You move on to getting phone numbers.
You move on to getting dates.

It's a very simple, but often ignored concept of working on the fundamentals of human communication before establishing intimacy. Wish I had the DJ Boot Camp when I was younger.


My second resource would be an excellent book to read, "How to Meet Friends and Influence People," by Dale Carnegie.

It's an old book, but it's a classic and still popular. Like the DJ Boot Camp, it focuses on the fundamentals.

In today's fast food/instant gratification society, we want shortcuts and we ignore the basics/fundamentals and hard work of getting to where we want to be.

You've already won one small victory: You identified a problem and are seeking advice.

Good job and keep trying!

 

[Viking25]

Perhaps you intimidate women with your looks. Or maybe you look somewhat unaproachable? Have you tried to scale down on the looks.,like don't take shower for two days and dress kinda stupid....things like that. That seemed to help me a bit as far as women were at least looking my way longer..hehe.
Perhaps you don't read body language well and don't see "buying signals" from women?
I am in the same boat so to speak,and many women told me that they are surprised that hot babes just don't flock to me when I go outside. Go figure them females..lol.

 

[ScrewIt]

Looks + confidence are intimidating to most women if not all.

its possible to be less intimidating by talking to them and being friendly with others as you will seem like any other cool guy out there. but looks will still intimidate in one form or another.

im in the same situation as you pal, and ive thought the same, so i know what u mean.

 

[thejuice]

Dont dress down! Instead of dressing stupid or not talking showers, why dont you try humor at your expense. By no means am i saying for you to bash yourself, more like a way to show a girl that you dont take yourself too seriously. If you want a good example, watch Conan O' Brien. Hes really funny

It works wonders because after making fun of yourself, you have a good excuse to make fun of her w/o her feeling put down by a "more attractive" guy

Good luck

 

[Scought]

Well...i sorta agree here.

I went to a club last night...I feel like I am an attractive person....people always are suprised, as well, to know im single.

I know i give off the wrong vibe.

I cannot just stand their with a cheesy smile. And this hurts me.

I also assume that if a chick digs me...she will come up and say hi.

I stand there like Sean Connery would (not making a looks comparision) but, I act unimpressed. Like ive seen it all before. With a sort of even-keeled look. Not too up, nor too down.

I guess this gets girls thinking im a prick, or a ****...or i scare them.

SO i feel your pain man and i agree with you. It must be the body language.

What else could it really be?

its just suprising women are 'intimated' by handsome looking men.

 

[dollashort]

i deal with the same issues too, and it drives me nuts.
everyone thinks that i got women allover me but in reality i dont.
ppl have told me that i intimidate women, so im growing a beard now.

2 things i am going to definitely do is read that book by dale carnegie, and get into a bootcamp.