So I'm pretty sure I was in the FZ with this chick, but I recently asked her out to a concert and she was very flirty about it and it's a go. What should my gameplan be going into this knowing that I was most likely in the FZ before? How can I text her and make sure it's still a go later in the week without sounding needy or desperate?
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Coming out of the friend zone
- Thread starter Dynasty32
- Start date
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
thunder_god
Master Don Juan
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- Jan 6, 2011
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You wouldn't need to text her to confirm anything if you made definitely plans with her. When you don't, you make it more likely for the girl to cancel or flake on you. When your on the date with the girl, do things friends wouldn't do, such as flirting, being touchy feely, going for the kiss, etc. You get the picture.Dynasty32 said:
VladPatton
Master Don Juan
You message a few hrs before only. If she cancels delete her number.
Greasy Pig
Master Don Juan
I believe you could use some texts to flirt lightly just to ensure she's aware of your intentions.
Instead of meekly confirming the date, say something subtle like: "Make sure you wear something nice this weekend. Something with a plunging neckline works for me! Lol."
Something suggestive but not crude should plant the seed. You need to somehow make it clear that you see this as a romantic outing, not two friends hanging out.
Instead of meekly confirming the date, say something subtle like: "Make sure you wear something nice this weekend. Something with a plunging neckline works for me! Lol."
Something suggestive but not crude should plant the seed. You need to somehow make it clear that you see this as a romantic outing, not two friends hanging out.
Thorninmyside
Master Don Juan
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Confirming dates is basically saying "I'm giving you one last chance to get out of this".
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
we follow eachother on twitter and snapchat. Should I go ghost on her until the day and see if she texts me at all? I kinda wanted her to drink and pregame it before the concert with me and my friends but I never said that too her at the time. You guys pulled me both ways and all made sense I just don't know what way to go lol
Coming out of the Friend Zone is about as easy as coming out of the Dead Zone. The Friend Zone is the Point of No Return.
It's like saying "How can I get a girl to like me after she has officially told all her friends that she would never like me?"
As Carlos Xuma said, you are (at least) 10 times more likely to find a new girl than resurrect one who has already determined you are not good enough for her.
But if you insist, you must improve yourself physically enough to wow her. Carlos said it best: "Why would she go back to something she has already said she didn't want unless you improved?" Start with a 3 day fast and liver cleanse.
Guys, when you get it right (and trust me, it took me 25 years), you'll have so many options that you won't have time to sulk over one girl. You'll also notice a funny phenomenon: the girl you saw last is the hottest (the contrapositive to the out-of-sight, out-of-mind phenomenon that holds us back).
It's like saying "How can I get a girl to like me after she has officially told all her friends that she would never like me?"
As Carlos Xuma said, you are (at least) 10 times more likely to find a new girl than resurrect one who has already determined you are not good enough for her.
But if you insist, you must improve yourself physically enough to wow her. Carlos said it best: "Why would she go back to something she has already said she didn't want unless you improved?" Start with a 3 day fast and liver cleanse.
Guys, when you get it right (and trust me, it took me 25 years), you'll have so many options that you won't have time to sulk over one girl. You'll also notice a funny phenomenon: the girl you saw last is the hottest (the contrapositive to the out-of-sight, out-of-mind phenomenon that holds us back).
Now I might have over used the friend zone reference. I only say friend zone because when we made out I was still dealing with an EX and I didn't really want to move on from her. So I never really tried to put out any kind of effort or move after that. I just got her number and talked to her once in a while. She was friends with my friend and so we hung out a few times during the summer. So yeah I would consider us friends but I don't think I've actually went all in after her and got rejected and out into the friend zone. I more of the less just had a ***** the whole time and was afraid of rejection. So now what do you think i should do?bigneil said:
Bible_Belt
Master Don Juan
The FZ does not actually exist - male-female friendships are simply people you haven't fvcked yet. Women will put guys on the shelf, and men will line up for a spot on that shelf.
Don't think of a one-time rejection as a forever rejection. Women are fickle. Just treat her like a new girl and forget whatever happened in the past. That's what she wants you to do.
Don't think of a one-time rejection as a forever rejection. Women are fickle. Just treat her like a new girl and forget whatever happened in the past. That's what she wants you to do.