Cold Approaching on The Street is So Much Fun...When You Get Back Into It

[Frank2500]

Today, I decided that I will set aside most of the late afternoon and evening making a move on any women on the street that I felt attracted to. As is the case from time to time, I unfortunately lost track of a good number of the ones I was trying to talk to-a lot of them seemed to be walking really fast as if in a hurry from work trying to head to train stations to catch the train, etc. But I knew I wasn't going to feel satisfied until I made a move on at least one woman when I saw an opportunity to do so. In the past, I have had quite some success with cold approaches on the street and have gotten phone numbers and e-mail addresses. However, due to the rudeness and harshness of a number of these women during the process in my AFC days and also because things have generally not worked out with a lot of the women I have met in the past, I went back into my shell and felt for the most part very discouraged about making cold approaches.


Today, I got a chance to talk to at least one woman on the street. We walked together for a while and unlike a lot of the rude ones I have met in the past, (and I'm sure this helped communication wise) she listened. She didn't just blow me off before I opened my mouth like a lot of them tend to do. Matter of fact, I tried to make a move on another woman today at a fresh produce market. Smiling, I introduced myself to her and tried to shake her hand, but she replied: "I have to run." So I let her go and moved on to the next opportunities.


So this woman and I walked together for quite a few blocks and I complimented her on her big ass and other things, got to make her laugh, and there was quite some chemistry. Although she did tell me that she had a boyfriend, I could tell for sure based on the vibe I got that if that were not the case, I would have had a chance.


I was just amazed at how comfortable I felt while talking to her, how much at ease I was, how balanced and stable my posture was, and the respect that I seemed to get from her throughout the process compared to some of my previous experiences. I had so much fun, it was unbelievable...I didn't care whether or not she approved of anything I said. I just did my thing. All of a sudden, I just don't seem to really care how many may say "no," because I've learned more than enough times that you're worse off if you don't take chances. The feeling of going home wondering what would have happened if you tried and never seeing that woman again is worse than not trying. So my personal philosophy is just to keep on talking to as many people as possible with the firm belief that even if I get 10 or more "nos," there will be a "yes" somewhere in between. I'm not going to let any "nos" make me feel discouraged or break my spirit or give up. Yet at the same time, I won't let any woman disrespect me just because I'm making a move on her. I won't tolerate that. It's never gonna happen.


So those who are new here, I join the other experienced folks on the forum who say that there's no other better way to practice than walking up to women you don't know and initiating those cold approaches. I thank this site for helping me get back to my feet and to begin the process toward rebecoming the man I once was before all my series of unfortunate and negative dating experiences.

 

[MikeYikes122]

Frank, it's good that you feel comfortable approaching women on the street. You're already doing better than 90 percent of the rest of the guys your age. But I think you should consider changing your opening lines.

I've read a couple of your posts now and it seems that when you cold approach you just walk up to a chick and say "Hi, my name is Frank. What is yours?" It really should be this easy, but it isn't and it sucks. I think you need to consider using another opener.

You said you were in a fresh produce market. That's a good place to come up with something better than "Hi, my name is Frank, and you are?" If you see a woman who catches your eye, ask her something about the store or tell her you need help finding the missing ingredient for a recipe or something. Use your surroundings to create an opener.

Or, this is a really good one that I often use. When you're standing in line at a grocery store or when you're at the gym, and you see a woman carrying one of those gossip magazines, find a way to approach her and comment on whatever celebrity is on the cover. My favorite is when one of those girls from that MTV reality show "The Hills" is on the cover. Lauren, from "The Hills", was on there about a month ago and I saw some hot-ass blonde girl reading it in front of me. I immediately got her to look in my direction, and I said "Will Lauren ever learn to quit taking Jason back?" She laughed hysterically and let me talk her up.

If your environment isn't good for this, use something on her person for an opener.

You'll get better at it with time.

 

[lookyoung]

Great job on cold approaching. Cold approaching on the street is the toughest part of gaming woman by far. Me personally I am great with number closing but I get a good percentage of flakes from the cold approach on the street, store, coffee shop........... Clubs and bars are alot better for me.

What makes the cold approach hard is you display zero value to the woman. She really does not know anything about you. The key is to be ballsy and have Confidence, and to seperate yourself from all the other azzholes she gets approached by.

Read Paradox thread on rejection.... This is very important to give you the balls to approach.

 

[Last Man Standing]

Doesn't it feel great to be a man? Celebrate manhood by being a man!!!!

 

[edger]

Great job on cold approaching. Cold approaching on the street is the toughest part of gaming woman by far. Me personally I am great with number closing but I get a good percentage of flakes from the cold approach on the street, store, coffee shop........... Clubs and bars are alot better for me.

What makes the cold approach hard is you display zero value to the woman. She really does not know anything about you. The key is to be ballsy and have Confidence, and to seperate yourself from all the other azzholes she gets approached by.

Read Paradox thread on rejection.... This is very important to give you the balls to approach.

Yo, lookyoung, there are a lot of hot women where you are. I was in Chicago a month and a half ago, and damn, there's some hot playboy material women your way, just like NYC.

 

[Bible_Belt]

I decided that I will set aside most of the late afternoon and evening making a move on any women on the street that I felt attracted to

+1 for that :rockon:

I complimented her on her big ass

and :crackup: for never being able to make a post without talking about big asses.

 

[MikeYikes122]

I complimented her on her big ass

and :crackup: for never being able to make a post without talking about big asses.

I've said this before. He is a man who knows what he likes. You can't fault him for that.

I laughed my ass off too when i read that.

 

[lookyoung]

Yo, lookyoung, there are a lot of hot women where you are. I was in Chicago a month and a half ago, and damn, there's some hot playboy material women your way, just like NYC.

LOL. Yeah Chicago has alot of pretty woman.Next time you come to Chicago PM me. I actually am going to NY for thanksgiving to visit family. I am going to willamsburg brooklyn. I am only staying for 4 days so I don't know if I will have a chance to party there, but hopefully I will.

BTW what part of Chicago did you stay at? Did you have a chance to hit any of the clubs? Next time your in town maybe we could hit the clubs and sarge.

 

[Frank2500]

Re:

Thanks to all who responded. To MikeYikes, it's unfortunate that women in this country in general are so superficial. But I will start practicing using my surroundings to initiate conversation with some of these women to see if it makes a difference. It may be slightly beneficial, but I do believe nonetheless that if the woman doesn't really want to listen to what you have to say, you really won't get that opportunity to make your move no matter what. She'll still walk away. Like the woman in the fresh produce market who said she had to run. Even if I asked her a question about spices as suggested, based on the vibe I saw, she probably would have still said she was in a hurry before I had a chance to say much. These days, I really don't care. It's her loss, not mine. There are lots of women out there. I'm now at a point where I quickly forget about women who aren't receptive to me when I approach them and I look forward eagerly to future opportunities. Practice does make perfect, I agree.

Personally, I also think Philadelphia isn't the best place for dating. I'm not sure if some of you got to read that report on Yahoo which said Americans rated it the "least attractive city." People in general just aren't very approachable or nice here, especially most of the women. But you have to roll with the punches, so that won't stop me from continuing to hunt. Thanks again to you all for your feedback.

 

[Frank2500]

Re:

I do agree that it is "creative" and possibly different to use some of the openers that were mentioned by MikeYikes and others based on the different surroundings and scenarios. However, I personally don't think that walking up to a woman with a smile on your face saying "hi" and attempting to shake her hand is necessarily a bad opener regardless of your surrounding. If anything, I think it shows confidence to walk up to a stranger and do that. The fact of the matter is, no matter what you try to say or what question you try to ask, if the woman in question doesn't want to give you that opportunity, she will come up with an excuse to leave regardless. So my philosophy is to forget about the past and yesterday and to remember that there are lots of women out there. I'm not going to waste my time pondering the reasons why perhaps one woman didn't respond to me the way I would have hoped. She's not the only woman in the world and that won't stop me from doing whatever I think works for me. It's a numbers game and eventually, I will find a couple who will respond positively.

 

[edger]

LOL. Yeah Chicago has alot of pretty woman.Next time you come to Chicago PM me. I actually am going to NY for thanksgiving to visit family. I am going to willamsburg brooklyn. I am only staying for 4 days so I don't know if I will have a chance to party there, but hopefully I will.

Williamsburg Brooklyn has some nice a$$..mostly indie rocker chix that look sexy as hell. Yeah PM me if you get a chance to go out, we'll hit the bars/clubs.

BTW what part of Chicago did you stay at? Did you have a chance to hit any of the clubs? Next time your in town maybe we could hit the clubs and sarge.

Not really too good with the names of the areas, but I was by Wrigley Field, which seems like a fight waiting to break out at any moment, lol. The bars were packed around there, tons of hot women, but the vibe in the area was like I said, a fight waiting to break out..seems like a fight prone area, lol. Then I was by the Navy Pier, which had tons of hot chix as well. I was only there for a day and a half with my bud, so I couldn't do much. Yeah I'll let you know if I go back.