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If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Cold approaching is overcompensating/gambling

tksniper

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You have to get yourself to a high enough value and attractiveness where women are actually giving you signs and invitations to approach. In this scenario, your success rate is really high. All that is demanded of you is to meet her halfway. She gives you the sign And you do your duty as a man and escalate.

But if you are cold approaching with zero signs, you’re overcompensating for a lack of value. So your problem wouldn’t be “game.” Your problem would be being low value.

If you are a low value gummy, you shouldn’t even be focused on approaching women. You should be focused on elevating your value and self worth.
 

SW15

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Approaching without IOIs is a very difficult path. It's not impossible, but arranging first dates from approaching without IOIs is a low percentage play.

Approaching with IOIs is a far better use of time.
 

tksniper

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There’s 8 billion people in this world because of high value men, women giving them signs, and the high value men escalating. This is literal human life. There’s no way around it. No shortcuts, secret tactics or techniques.

If you are not getting signs to approach, work on yourself!
 

tksniper

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Approaching without IOIs is a very difficult path. It's not impossible, but arranging first dates from approaching without IOIs is a low percentage play.

Approaching with IOIs is a far better use of time.
Most sane women just want us to meet them halfway when they feel attracted to us. Of course, most women are entitled so their version of “halfway” is you still have to approach, lol. But they will give you a million signs. If they really like you, they would even park themselves right next to you and eye fvck you. All you have to do is crack a joke or make some comment.

However, I’ve had 6s and 7s who weren’t the hottest open me with some random comments and all I had to do was close.
 

Reincarnated

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This sounds more like an excuse to not cold approach. All quality women aren't going to demonstrate interest all of the time, even to high value men. I don't see the issue with cold-approaching, other than it's become more difficult due to societal and technological changes. Those who can do it well these days are typically highly confident and enjoyable to be around
 

tksniper

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This sounds more like an excuse to not cold approach. All quality women aren't going to demonstrate interest all of the time, even to high value men. I don't see the issue with cold-approaching, other than it's become more difficult due to societal and technological changes. Those who can do it well these days are typically highly confident and enjoyable to be around
This hasn’t been my experience. A quality woman who is afraid to demonstrate interest is not a quality woman. She’s insecure/has too much pride. And probably a pain in the ass to deal with.
 

tksniper

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I don't need a prerequisite to approach a woman I am attracted to. Is it harder? maybe, but who cares.
I’m not saying it’s impossible. But why not gain 25 lbs of muscle and get more iois? That’s totally within your power.
 

tksniper

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I'll do that regardless and not for the sake of getting a chick (although it can be a nice side effect)
I have tats and I work out 6 times a week. There hasnt been a week for the past 20 years where I didn’t get an ioi from an attractive woman. That’s why it’s so odd for me that guys would justify having to cold approach.

However I get it that sometimes you run into a woman you really like and she isn’t giving you any signs. In That situation, it would make sense to cold approach. So I understand where you are coming from too.

However, 90% of your approaches should be from signs because you are attractive. And if that’s not the case, your problem isn’t game, it’s the fact that you aren’t high value
 

Reincarnated

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I’m not saying it’s impossible. But why not gain 25 lbs of muscle and get more iois? That’s totally within your power.
Why not do both, no harm there. Be big & be bold.

I guess we've had different experiences. I've found that the women who are most expressive of interest early on tend to be the most troublesome.

And I'd add that for lower confidence guys cold approaching might do wonders to boost confidence (as long as you aren't an idiot about it). It's arguably the best way to eliminate fear of rejection which is one of the heaviest monkeys on most guys back, and if you do it consistently and we'll, you'll eventually find success, which is a huge morale boost.
 

f(x)

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Which signs do you look for? I’ll approach if I get even second’s worth of eye contact or if a woman is in within range of hearing my six-foot voice (you can approach from a distance). Signs aren’t always obvious. I had a good interaction with a college aged woman a few days ago. I approached and engaged a four set of young ladies this afternoon. I literally approach women almost every time I leave the house. I’ve been doing this on and off since about 1996, so I have probably calibrated and fine-tuned the act. I don’t feel uncomfortable doing it at all. It really is not a big deal as long as you’re not vulgar or obscene. I’ve studied body language, so I look for nonverbal cues as well. I approach if she’s wearing earbuds. I don’t approach from behind, if she is obviously looking away as she passes, or if she is talking on the phone. In all the time I have done this, negative reactions have been statistically insignificant while lays are probably in the single digits. I don’t necessarily approach just to get laid either. I genuinely like being social and talking to people.
 

tksniper

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Why not do both, no harm there. Be big & be bold.

I guess we've had different experiences. I've found that the women who are most expressive of interest early on tend to be the most troublesome.

And I'd add that for lower confidence guys cold approaching might do wonders to boost confidence (as long as you aren't an idiot about it). It's arguably the best way to eliminate fear of rejection which is one of the heaviest monkeys on most guys back, and if you do it consistently and we'll, you'll eventually find success, which is a huge morale boost.
Yeah I totally agree with this. When I first started approaching, even the women giving me signs would act clueless as soon as I would approach. And sometimes a woman who is ignoring me is the sweetest sunshine I ever met.

So it’s not really black and white.

Nowadays my method is just looking for signs and my success rate is usually 90%. Without signs, it’s 10%.

But for a total newb, I totally agree with you. Newbs have to kill their pride and egos. They have to approach everything and anything. Only when they set themselves “free” can they actually play the game based on face value.

My post was more geared towards veterans. But for newbs, ALWAYS extend your comfort zone! Approach anything and everything.
 

tksniper

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Which signs do you look for? I’ll approach if I get even second’s worth of eye contact or if a woman is in within range of hearing my six-foot voice (you can approach from a distance). Signs aren’t always obvious. I had a good interaction with a college aged woman a few days ago. I approached and engaged a four set of young ladies this afternoon. I literally approach women almost every time I leave the house. I’ve been doing this on and off since about 1996, so I have probably calibrated and fine-tuned the act. I don’t feel uncomfortable doing it at all. It really is not a big deal as long as you’re not vulgar or obscene. I’ve studied body language, so I look for nonverbal cues as well. I approach if she’s wearing earbuds. I don’t approach from behind, if she is obviously looking away as she passes, or if she is talking on the phone. In all the time I have done this, negative reactions have been statistically insignificant while lays are probably in the single digits. I don’t necessarily approach just to get laid either. I genuinely like being social and talking to people.

Based on your experience, I don’t think your problem is calibration. It’s based on not having a niche. You are probably calibrating to women.

For example , my niche is fast escalation and sexual/Romantic vibe right away. So even WITH signs, I turn off 90% of women I approach (regardless of how they were looking at me) But with the 10%, I still average 25-40 new women a year.

So the next evolution for your game would be stop calibrating to women and just do your own style.

You have to truely commit to your style/personality and have faith there is a demographic of women out there that appreciates your vibe.
 

tksniper

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For example today, I had a hot bartender give me a bunch of signs. I haven’t approached her yet but I will in the next two hours. I’m not in that bar currently . I’ll tell you guys how it went. My style is straight to escalation. Suggest a date/hangout and the number is an afterthought.

This is what I do everyday. Just approach based on signs. I’ve found that many times, women would give me signs based on who they think I am. But when I come with the aggressive approach, it disqualifies a lot of women. So we’ll see where it goes . I’ll keep you guys posted.
 

tksniper

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My goal is not to make it “work” with her. My goal is to qualify / disqualify her based on my own style. I’m not going to bend over backwards trying to calibrate to her standards.
 

espanish

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you must be living in the 1990s. the problem with what you say is there is no such thing as ioi. these days girls are too self-centered to give ioi's. all they want to do is troll themselves on facebook and go get their next botox injection.
if i wait for ioi i will be waiting forever.
there is such a thing as iod. examples of that are girls being rude, not complying, answering your question with a question.
 

tksniper

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you must be living in the 1990s. the problem with what you say is there is no such thing as ioi. these days girls are too self-centered to give ioi's. all they want to do is troll themselves on facebook and go get their next botox injection.
if i wait for ioi i will be waiting forever.
there is such a thing as iod. examples of that are girls being rude, not complying, answering your question with a question.
So you are saying there is no such thing as a ripped 6’2 guy who gets iois all day? If that’s what you’re saying, you’re projecting your own lack of iois.
 

espanish

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So you are saying there is no such thing as a ripped 6’2 guy who gets iois all day? If that’s what you’re saying, you’re projecting your own lack of iois.
I don't know, I have never been 6'2 or ripped lol.
but I agree that a guy should have standards. i know a guy who just spams every girls he sees and it's disgusting. I am selective and I don't like 90% of the girls that I see. most girls are just stupid and brain dead.
 
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