"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Cold approach results?

Bonhomme

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There's a lot of talk here about cold approaches. The concept behind this post is to get people to think about the dynamics of the whole thing -- so you your "approach dynamics" become second nature, and don't get to thinking of it when you do approach a gal.

What I'm wondering is how much has come out of cold approaches for you guys. The good, the bad, and the ugly.

I'm talking real cold approaches, where you're attracted to a gal, and approach her without either of you sending any sort of signals, such as eye contact, a smile, or certainly not eye contact with a smile.

Anybody have anything really good come out of such cold approaches?

I rarely have, except in cases where a gal I'd not paid attention to pproached me. It's become second nature for me to engage the gal nonverbally first, before I approach.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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PVSSY-EATER

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I will tell you like I told the other guy, you need to put your energy into your career and your dreams and have some goals man, doing this one million cold approaches mean absolutely nothing, and if you are trying to impress some body on this site with how many approaches you do, just save it. Women are simple to get, simple to fvck, simple to date, simple, simple, simple. If you dont know that...reply and I will explain further. But after you get them, they cant satisfy you, they are just icing on the cake my friend, put your energy into something worthwhile....seriously.....for real.
 

AwNaw

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PVSSY-Eater, please do explain. I haven't been able to figure it out yet.
 

Scoiland

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Originally posted by AwNaw
PVSSY-Eater, please do explain. I haven't been able to figure it out yet.

what he means is put all your energy and effort into something that is just for you

like work, or some sort of skill you have

Girls are just there to come along for the ride, do not stress about them too hard or else you will seem like every other guy out there.

You must be a busy man, you can still do approaches but don't make it at the top of your priorities list
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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Make approaching a part of your lifestyle as is breathing. Don't worry about the numbers or outcomes, just do it regularly and without trepidation.
 

Caldus

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Originally posted by Scoiland
what he means is put all your energy and effort into something that is just for you

like work, or some sort of skill you have

Girls are just there to come along for the ride, do not stress about them too hard or else you will seem like every other guy out there.

You must be a busy man, you can still do approaches but don't make it at the top of your priorities list
That's a very good attitude. I like that. As far as women are concerned, they would be nice but aren't desperately needed. I say pressure yourself to approach more but not too much. Too much is when you take this approach stuff so seriously and becomes a big purpose of your life (that is ... women). Women shouldn't be the one and only purpose in life ... find something else to make you more complete in my opinion.
 

Bonhomme

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Don't take things too seriously myself

Nobody's really answered my question. This came to mind when I saw yet another "cold approach" thread, and it just occurred to me that I could not recall ever picking any gal up without some sort of "buying signals' from her first, or some readymade opener that "pre-warmed" the approach.

The real motive of this thread is that I think guys waste too much energy treating approaching as a salesmanship-like confrontational situation, and too little effort developing the sort of charisma that makes women want to hit on them with cheesy pick-up lines. And this has everything to do with what PVSSY-EATER and Scoiland posted.

I don't take things too seriously regarding women these days. Just do what feels natural, and that's it. If it feels right to approach a particular woman, I do; if it doesn't, I don't. Sometimes the reason lies in me, sometimes in her. I'm not always "on," by any means.

I'm very, very good at picking up vibes... and broadcasting them. With rare exceptions, I tend to establish some sort of non-verbal communication as a matter of course before introducing myself to someone, unless there is a readymade "opener," such as if they are in a band that just played, and I want to give them props.

There are so may woman out there, and I have so much else going on. Also, things happen when you least expect them.
 

ketostix

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I think you're further dividing the term cold-approach into whether you get some type of "buying signal" or indication of interest (IOI) from your target: a smile, eye contact, etc.) before approaching and cold approaches where you don't have a IOI. They're both cold approaches technically 'cause either way you're both strangers. Conventional wisdom is, and I think you agree, that getting an IOI from your target likely is an indication you'll be more successful approaching her. That is probably generally true but I've heard of successful cold approaches without any IOI and I've had girls give me good IOI and were total b!tches when I approached them, worse than when I didn't get indication of interest.

It depends on the setting really. Sometimes the setting just doesn't offer a chance for you to observe her giving you a buying signal. If you try to make eye contact and the opportunity for her to give you a buying signals is there and she doesn't, it seems a good assumption that she's not interested, but I find that's not really always the case. You can't always read chicks on buying signal either way.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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