Coffee, Tea or Me - Hit Me With Best Tactic

[tincanman99]

I will make a long story short. This woman at work had major interest for me for about 6 months. I never took the bait. I was in total player mode. Frankly I didnt care what she did, whether she spoke to me, whatever... I was walking around arrogant and ****y. Frankly she was eating it up. I would flirt with her, be funny but never ask her out.

I finally buckled, we went out a bunch of times. Than after a particular ferocious 6 hour make out session she broke down my resistance. I "admitted" I liked her. HUGE mistake. After that I started doing AFC things - being "nice", telling her I liked her. After our last date I emailed her once and txted her once telling her I wanted to see her again - right after our date - HUGE MISTAKE again. The following week I called her once and than txted her once. Of course she did not reply. I proceeded to tell her if you dont want to see me, just tell me. Another MISTAKE.

Like a total fool I gave all my power to her instead of just ignoring her. I realized I messed up so I TOTALLY CUT OFF HER. I backed way, way off. No email, no phone calls - NO NOTHING. I have not seen her for the past month even though I work with her. I literally have disappeared from her life. I had a bit of one-itis and realized it immediately so I went out with some other women and got busy with my life. I also visited a strip club and have some of them entertain me in private . It helps remind you that all women are women.

I went down for coffee with my coworker to the internal cafe this afternoon. I was making my coffee and I glanced over and SHE was standing about 6 feet from me looking at the bread and muffins. Kind of had that expression of the cat that ate the canary - almost like a smirk. This girl does not eat bread or muffins. Believe me when I say this.

I turned my back and went back to making my coffee so as to go about my business. While we were on line she was standing there moving every so slowly while looking at the yogurt. So slow than a turtle could have walked by. Than she so slowly walked out into the hall. I told my coworker to slow it down as we are at the register and than I told him to go right instead of left. Because if I went left I would have to ride the elevator back up with her. And I would have been cornered like a rat.

I believe she was moving this slow on purpose and she had to see
me. She made no attempt to speak with me. We never made eye or facial contact.

For the past month I have been total avoidance. I cut off all contact with her after that week. No email, no phone calls - no nothing. I totally disappeared from the planet.

Frankly I was like whatever, you want to talk to me - fine, if not thats fine too.

So whats the best tactic - continue doing what I am doing? I am sure at this point she has realized I have backed off. I still want to sleep with her but I will not call her nor email her. Its going to be on my terms. Its inevitable that I will run into her sooner or later...

Hit me with your best ideas...

 

[Igetit!]

Seems to me that you TOTALLY screwed your chances with this girl. The good thing is that you do realize the mistakes you made. I don't understand why you don't just move on,and meet someone else. Since you know what you did wrong with this girl,the next time you're in a relationship you'll be able to avoid these same mistakes. Personally,I'd just forget about her,but the funny thng is that if you did move on,and I mean truely move on,she'd "sense" it,then her interest in you would start to grow.

 

[tincanman99]

I learned this crap the hard way. It dawned on me if you keep having the same results what am I DOING WRONG. So I have been reading for a long time and realize the mistakes I made. Next time I need to control my behavior and emotions.

I have been working on meeting people. Its easier said than done though . In my particular field its all dudes and I dont encounter the honeys to much outside of work because of my hours.

Today was the first time I have had contact with her in a month. And I didnt go running over to chat with her nor did I run away. I was just like you are there - so what.

Thing is my cut off plan was so successful I literally have no contact with her now. NONE.

 

[kdnash82]

Best way would be to find another girl to flirt with while at work and for her to see this. Women are jealous creatures.

If not possible because you work with a bunch of dudes, not sure what your other options would be.

Whatever happens, don't talk to her again. If she contact you, go back to being C&F. DO NOT ASK HER OUT AGAIN.

 

[tincanman99]

There is a lot of guys here but there are some women sprinkled about. Just not tons of them. A few I would like to nail .

I have no intent of contacting her nor speaking to her unless unavoidable. I will not ask her out again EVER. I dont need to be kicked to many times before I realize I am stupid.

My buddy said she absolutely did what she did today to provoke a reaction. He said its probably making her crazy you cut her off and didnt run over to talk with her today.

NEXT.

 

[kdnash82]

Good job... stick with your guns no matter what.