"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Club, lounge, bowling, or just dinner/walk - first date?

AlmostThere!

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A girl contacted me on a dating website. She sent a decent message and included her telephone # and told me to text her. She's a 7. Most important thing is she's not a fattie.

We talked through text. So, she basically asked what I'm looking for...my answer 'something worthwhile'. She gives me a long reply with what she's looking for and she thinks (based on my profile) we'll get along.

Anyway, I said we should hang out Friday night and I'll let her know the details Thursday. She has pretty high IL right now. But I wouldn't be surprised if she gets a better offer now until Friday.

When I text her Thursday, I plan on meeting her near where she lives for a light meal. She doesn't drink. Basically, I said we can meet and see if we click, and then decide to do something else if things go well.

She's definitely looking for a relationship. How do I know? That's what she said. Haha.

If our meetup goes well, what would be a good second part to our date? We could go dancing (which she likes). We could go someplace like Dave and Buster's and bowl or play pool (good kino oppt). Or we could just have a meal and walk the city (boring, but good oppt to talk).

What would you do? And she seems like a text-only girl...how do I get her on the phone Thursday so I can hear her voice?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Iceberg

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Look at you, buddy. Talking about real dates instead of random weird s***.

Actually, I'm gonna be taking a girl on a 2nd date to Dave and Buster's sometime this weekend too. Wanna double? Just kidding about that last part.

But yeah, an action date is a good idea. Save the clubs and dancing for another time. You'll want to go somewhere you can actually hear her talk, and charm her with your...winning personalty. If your heart is set on bowling, there's also a Lucky Strike in Center City Philly, and a place called North Bowl. Might have a hard time finding a lane on a Friday night though.

And how do you get this girl on the phone? You call her. If she's interested enough to meet you for a date, she'll be interested enough to talk for 10 minutes.

Ideally, man, you don't want to set up a date on a Friday, because you at least want to appear too busy to give up one of the fun nights (Fri, Sat) for a random chick. But whatever. Worry about that later.

You got this. Just be your normal, weird-self, and do your thing. And best of all, if you settle down with a nice chick, I don't have to look at your weird posts anymore.

Good luck.
 

AlmostThere!

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Iceberg said:
You got this. Just be your normal, weird-self, and do your thing. And best of all, if you settle down with a nice chick, I don't have to look at your weird posts anymore.

Good luck.
Oh no...I'm still going to post weird questions. Just for you.
 

AlmostThere!

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Iceberg said:
Ideally, man, you don't want to set up a date on a Friday, because you at least want to appear too busy to give up one of the fun nights (Fri, Sat) for a random chick. But whatever. Worry about that later.
I need at least a day to plan for a date so tomorrow was too soon. Thursdays I'm busy...and this Saturday night I got plans. I usually do Tuesday/Wednesday for first dates. I don't think she's going "he sucks, he invited me out Friday night. He must not have a life." Haha.
 

Kailex

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Well, what's an AlmostThere post without me and Iceberg in it, right?

Friday is okay. Just, if the dating progresses, ALWAYS seem like you can't give her Saturdays. I just recently had this discussion with Plate #1. She was complaining about why we never went out on Saturdays. But that's beside the point.

And like Ice said: Just call her.

Now about the date... it's a first date, try to make it cost-effective, but try to make it something fun, mindless, silly, whatever. Try to avoid dinner/food, at least, in my opinion. In another thread, I stated I hated doing restaurants/dinner as first dates because you generally have to sit at a booth or across from each other at a table, and this generally robs you of the kino element.

Leave club/dancing for another date.

You want 1-on-1 interaction. You don't want to compete with loud music and other people pushing, shoving, etc.
So Dave and Busters might be a good idea.

And the weather is decent enough this week that you won't be freezing TOO much if you walk around. BTW, you are morally obligated to post here after Friday and let us know how it went.




Iceberg, you kill me. You do.
But he better not be TOO weird and talk about the Mayan Calendar.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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