"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Club Frustration

The Monolith

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Last night I went out sarging in an attempt to alleviate my oneitis. Now before you start, this thread isn't gonna be a moan, all considered the night wasn't too bad. I do however have some discussion points.
My mindset going in was to not take anything too seriously and to not care about rejection. I had a drink then hit the dance floor. I was with about four of my flatmates but they spent the whole night by the bar. First issue, all the girls there were at least hb 8's, now I know that's not really a bad thing, but I like to work my way up. I approach an all female group dancing, they look at me then whisper to each other and start laughing (does this ever happen to anyone else?), not the best start but I don't let it get me, I move on, most girls I try dancing with don't even give me a second of EC, this is very off putting. After approaching almost every girl on the dance floor and having some ask me what the hell I was doing I went to have another drink, feeling a bit crushed.
I almost gave up at this point but forced myself to go back one more time, glad I did because this time the hb8 I danced with started rubbing against my crotch and pulling me towards her, she had her head down and wouldn't make EC though, so I thought I'd go back to her then moved on. Then a really cute girl walks up to me and tells me she can't find her friends, direct EC and a smile, I move into kiss her, she grabs onto me and kisses me back a few times, then says 'nice to meet you' and walks off. The club closed shortly after that.
I am wondering if this is a typical club experience (I don't go often) for a lot of guys. So if anyone would like to share similair stories, would help. Would also be grateful for any advice pertaining to this kind of situation.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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aelux

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The Monolith said:
Last night I went out sarging in an attempt to alleviate my oneitis. Now before you start, this thread isn't gonna be a moan, all considered the night wasn't too bad. I do however have some discussion points.
My mindset going in was to not take anything too seriously and to not care about rejection. I had a drink then hit the dance floor. I was with about four of my flatmates but they spent the whole night by the bar. First issue, all the girls there were at least hb 8's, now I know that's not really a bad thing, but I like to work my way up. I approach an all female group dancing, they look at me then whisper to each other and start laughing (does this ever happen to anyone else?), not the best start but I don't let it get me, I move on, most girls I try dancing with don't even give me a second of EC, this is very off putting. After approaching almost every girl on the dance floor and having some ask me what the hell I was doing I went to have another drink, feeling a bit crushed.
I almost gave up at this point but forced myself to go back one more time, glad I did because this time the hb8 I danced with started rubbing against my crotch and pulling me towards her, she had her head down and wouldn't make EC though, so I thought I'd go back to her then moved on. Then a really cute girl walks up to me and tells me she can't find her friends, direct EC and a smile, I move into kiss her, she grabs onto me and kisses me back a few times, then says 'nice to meet you' and walks off. The club closed shortly after that.
I am wondering if this is a typical club experience (I don't go often) for a lot of guys. So if anyone would like to share similair stories, would help. Would also be grateful for any advice pertaining to this kind of situation.
I usually get my dance on then after dancing for a short time see if any girls are giving IOIs. If they are then I move closer and see if the IOIs are continuing then move to dancing with them. Doesn't always work but it's a good way to generate some interest from what is essentially a cold pickup.
 

The Monolith

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Sounds like a good plan but it is difficult because I rarely or never get IOI in clubs. My only succuess last night came from my own initiations. I was mainly curious as to whether other guys experience the same hostility from women in clubs as I seem to.
 

aelux

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The Monolith said:
Sounds like a good plan but it is difficult because I rarely or never get IOI in clubs. My only succuess last night came from my own initiations. I was mainly curious as to whether other guys experience the same hostility from women in clubs as I seem to.
Might be the club not you. My friends and I made a huge mistake and went to an exclusive euro club with a $20 cover and $6 beers. No IOIs and no one was dancing. We just didn't have the look. No matter who you are there's a club/bar/organization for you. What are you interests? What music do you listen to? Find a club/bar with people that off the bat share a common interest.
 

WC2

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Can I be brutally honest? Ok, good.

Is this my typical club experience? No.

Rules in clubs are just the same as rules anywhere else. You are the prize. You are a witty, confident, good looking prize. As soon as you step on that dance floor alone (unless you've got some rediculous moves), women see you totally opposite of the prize. They know the name of your game, and they're laughing at it.

They know your sole purpose for even going out that night is to dance with a girl. You are pretty much screaming aloud "I HAVE NO OTHER WAY TO APPROACH BESIDES DANCING BY MYSELF LIKE A CREEP." You are labeled just another loser. So what do women look for?

It's really not tough at all. I go out pretty frequently, most of the time just to have fun with my boys. Not to dance, not to put myself in a desperate mode and ask all the girls to dance. Grab a drink, start off some conversation with your friends, and smile. Take a round around the club confidently, look at all the girls, smile at them and look them in the eyes till they look away.

That's it. Yup. You heard it. You are now a valid player on the block. Your chances of success just rose from nothing to 90% better than any guy in that club. The only thing that's left is an approach, preferably on one of the women who you locked eyes with. Don't rush it. Make her laugh, don't offer to buy her a drink, and don't rush to ask her to dance. As a matter a fact, don't even pose dancing as a question. If you've been getting her to laugh, working in some kino, and maintaining strong eye contact, then you can TELL her to come dance with you. Dancing is a good way to seal the deal. Asking a girl to dance before initiating conversation usually results in flaking due to the fact you come of as a creep.

With that said, results vary. It helps to be atleast a tad fit and in shape. Overweight guys have to pull out all the stops a lot of the time.

But please, be classy. Yes women do want to get freaky, but they don't want to see you getting freaky by yourself on the dance floor. They want a classy, confident guy to get freaky with later. good luck
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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