Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

Read more...

Closure and knowing when to let it go.

Bear X

New Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2018
Messages
6
Reaction score
2
Age
57
Location
Australia
I met an amazing woman online after being single for 3 years after a failed 17 year marriage. We lived a state away from each other and visited each other many times over about year and it was an intense relationship in very good ways but one day she became distant and then soon friend zoned me. She was one of the most amazing women l had ever met and even though she LJBF me she contacts me online fairly regularly and l understand where l have gone wrong, especially after reading the Rational Male by Rollo but l am still feeling a heart ache l can't shake. How can l get past it?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

IKO69

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2005
Messages
1,184
Reaction score
1,088
Age
43
Location
Miami, FL
You preoccupy yourself with other things/women.

I have also been in a similar situation a long time ago. It did not work out with a particular woman and it messed me up for months. I didn't even go out and try to meet other women during that time. I did **** all, absolute ****. What did I gain? Not a ****ing thing in the end with all the sulking, feeling down, pondering the "what if's"....It was just a waste of time.

I think you would rather make good memories than relive terrible one's so it's better to cut your losses and move on. As special as she may seem, there will be other women out there who will be just as better and perhaps you may even find someone you spend years with. Take care man.
 

Atom Smasher

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2008
Messages
8,651
Reaction score
6,591
Age
69
Location
The 7th Dimension
You are simply going through a drug withdrawal.

Read the e-book in my signature. You will absolutely get over this girl in a hurry if you do. It changed my life and stopped my pain within a day.

The book is "How to Get Over Anyone in a Few Days". It works better than any advice you will read here, not because our advice is wrong, but rather because of the way the author presents it. Click "Books" on the menu bar and you will find it.
 

Bear X

New Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2018
Messages
6
Reaction score
2
Age
57
Location
Australia
You preoccupy yourself with other things/women.

I have also been in a similar situation a long time ago. It did not work out with a particular woman and it messed me up for months. I didn't even go out and try to meet other women during that time. I did **** all, absolute ****. What did I gain? Not a ****ing thing in the end with all the sulking, feeling down, pondering the "what if's"....It was just a waste of time.

I think you would rather make good memories than relive terrible one's so it's better to cut your losses and move on. As special as she may seem, there will be other women out there who will be just as better and perhaps you may even find someone you spend years with. Take care man.
Thanks man, it's messed up to feel like this but you are right of course. Putting myself first and following my passions instead of crushing my own fire inside is the only correct path. You take care to man.
 

Bear X

New Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2018
Messages
6
Reaction score
2
Age
57
Location
Australia
You are simply going through a drug withdrawal.

Read the e-book in my signature. You will absolutely get over this girl in a hurry if you do. It changed my life and stopped my pain within a day.

The book is "How to Get Over Anyone in a Few Days". It works better than any advice you will read here, not because our advice is wrong, but rather because of the way the author presents it. Click "Books" on the menu bar and you will find it.
You are right in saying it's like a drug addiction withdrawl. l will check this book out! Thanks friend.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

L0bsang

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 12, 2007
Messages
10
Reaction score
1
Hey man,

Sorry that your 17 year marriage and your recent relationship ended. I am not sure how many people here have gone through that much time with one person and actively post here. You are in a lot of pain I still imagine and will be for a while. It’s ok to be sad and talk to your friends about this. Please start exercising or get a bike to get outta the house. Follow some sort of workout routine and stick to it. Also this video helped me immensely, please watch it and watch it again so you don’t dwell too much. Take care brother. Let us know how you are doing

 

Atom Smasher

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2008
Messages
8,651
Reaction score
6,591
Age
69
Location
The 7th Dimension
You are right in saying it's like a drug addiction withdrawl. l will check this book out! Thanks friend.
Let me know how it works out for you. The book changed my life and it not only helps with women abut has a broader application to life problems. The author's native tongue is not English so you may see n awkward way of turning a phrase here and there, but the message comes through loud and clear.
 

Bear X

New Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2018
Messages
6
Reaction score
2
Age
57
Location
Australia
Let me know how it works out for you. The book changed my life and it not only helps with women abut has a broader application to life problems. The author's native tongue is not English so you may see n awkward way of turning a phrase here and there, but the message comes through loud and clear.
I will! Thank you again and this community. This forum is very valuable to reviving a man into owning his life.
 

Bear X

New Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2018
Messages
6
Reaction score
2
Age
57
Location
Australia
Hey man,

Sorry that your 17 year marriage and your recent relationship ended. I am not sure how many people here have gone through that much time with one person and actively post here. You are in a lot of pain I still imagine and will be for a while. It’s ok to be sad and talk to your friends about this. Please start exercising or get a bike to get outta the house. Follow some sort of workout routine and stick to it. Also this video helped me immensely, please watch it and watch it again so you don’t dwell too much. Take care brother. Let us know how you are doing

Thanks brother, yeah pain is right and been with me for some time but guys here have given me hope. Exercising again and putting my self first now and feel more confident than l have in a long time. This video was great and spoke a simple but important truth. I will keep in touch.
 
Top