Close friend from the past (male) wants to be friends again after many years

[caporal]

One of my best friends from the past, we went to high school and University together, we always hang out, we where like brothers, we did lots of crazy **** together.

I became distant for a few reasons back in the day, mostly he lied to me and tried to manipulate me (he also had a crazy relationship with his gf where he was beating her bad) So I ended our friendship in the middle of University, he then got on probation and kicked out, never heard from him again and now he wants to be my friend again he contacted me through Facebook.

It;s been many years and Im not sure whether to give my old friend a chance and get in contact or just let it go. I really want to know what are your thoughts on this because there are many wise guys here and I respect and value your advice. I mean should we stick to a decision we made years ago just for the principle, or would we make a new decision and give someone who has proven to be a bad person a chance.

 

[caporal]

Bump

Any Opinions, Any Wise Advise?

 

[Lexington]

Worth a try. This ain't some broad you used to date. If he's still got issues, you can always opt not to hang out with him again. But you never know, you may rekindle an old friendship.

 

[GhostWriter]

I would just ignore him and continue to put your energy into the good friends you have already.

 

[caporal]

I Gave The Guy A Chance Since We Where So Close Back In The Day. We Talked Yesterday On Skype And It Was Cool Catching Up, We Where Sharing Stories From The Past. He Wanted To Meet Someday And I Dont Think So, Im Not Sure If I Will Let Him Back Into My Circle Of Close Friends But I Will Keep In Touch I Guess.

Yeah, I Don't Believe People Change, If They Try To Fvck With You Once, They Will Try Again For Sure!
So I Now Think Clearly That Second Parts Of Friendship Are Not Good Its Best To Avoid People From The Past That We Grew Distant From Them, Just Like With Women!!

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Caporal,
You know in twenty seconds of meeting him what the score is...trust that little angel that sits on your shoulder...it's always right even if perhaps your behaviour elicits the anticipated outcome.

 

[DJDamage]

We Where Sharing Stories From The Past.

That's pretty much it, you had a past with him and the reason you became distant is because this guy was a liar and manipulator. As far as I am concerned he sealed his fate with those actions by proving he wasn't worthy of your friendship.

Just like with women, sometimes when things go bad we also need to NEXT our friends and move on.

 

[Zig-zag-man]

I was in a situation very similar to the one described by the TS.

I had parted ways with a guy I was best friends with for many years over an issue that came up within our circle of friends. I guess you could say sides were taken, ultimately he didn't have my back, and we grew distant and apart.

A year and some time later he texted me outta the blue with an apology. I had some things to get off my chest and I wanted to hear what he had to say, so we met up at a bar for a few drinks. I said what I needed to say and got to hear his side of the story, and so I thought to myself, after this much time has passed all he can really do at this point IS apologize. I figured, he took the chance and made the effort to contact me after so long, recognizing and apologizing for his mistake, and was willing to meet up to talk man-to-man, maybe the great friendship we had could be rekindled.

We had been best friends for many years, going through school and parts of University together, hanging out all the time, experiencing a buncha crazy ****, going to the same gyms, just overall going through life on the same path. Thinking about the "past" and the good times we had, in retrospect, clouded my judgment, and although the trust between us had long been broken, I gave it another shot.

It proved foolish, and things unraveled soon after I had made amends with him. He was still the same type of person he was before we stopped hanging out, as over the time I've known him he became flaky, not up-front, lazy and unwilling to try new things. Looking back, my expectations were a bit naive, as I thought things would go back to the "way they were" but they didn't. We had been growing apart for a while, even before the issue with our friends came up, and I just didn't see it.

My advice to the TS: Respect yourself. If you wouldn't stay with a chick that cheated on you, then don't stay with friends who have done you an equal wrong. I did and I'm still kicking myself for it. Appreciate the good friends you have now, know that people change either for the better or for the worse, and be thankful for the people who will always have your back as you go down your path in life.