"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Clearing your mind ?

JohnChops

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Sometimes I find myself "in my head" and need to get out of it. I think a lot , like when im just walking around and contemplate a lot of things that are just around me. It makes me over think simple situations like approaching women and what not and frankly it gives me a headache lol.

Does anyone have any techniques for me to unplug myself from my own mind? To attempt to get out of my head so to speak . I just hate thinking to myself sometimes because I just over do it most of the time ...... im in dire need of some way to combat this .
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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DonnyJuanny

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Hey there, man. I run into this same problem lots of time as I am also a thinker. For the most part I can quiet the unimportant things but if something is really "sticking" in there then I just accept it. First, I will willingly acknowledge thinking about it. Just stop and realize you're thinking about it. After that I try to just process it. Realize I thought about it for a few seconds and then it'll go away. It's very hard, for me anyway, to eliminate thoughts. The more I think about not thinking about them then I think about them more so it's kind of like giving it the attention it wants only for a second and then shuffling it away.

On another note, if this thought is something that makes you sad or mad then I will again accept that I thought of it (giving it attention) and then I will tell myself that it's just a thought. I alone decide how it makes me feel. This has helped me tremendously. Maybe it'll do the same for you.
 

Victory Unlimited

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You can get out of your own head by investing more time into the lives of other people who are "worthy" of your interest. If you start expanding your circle of friends, relatives, and associates-----and you allow yourself to "get over yourself" enough to develop a GENUINE interest in the lives of other people-------you'll soon find YOUR OWN LIFE more balanced, enriched, and fulfilling.


V.U.
 

JohnChops

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Victory Unlimited said:
You can get out of your own head by investing more time into the lives of other people who are "worthy" of your interest. If you start expanding your circle of friends, relatives, and associates-----and you allow yourself to "get over yourself" enough to develop a GENUINE interest in the lives of other people-------you'll soon find YOUR OWN LIFE more balanced, enriched, and fulfilling.


V.U.

ive actually met a few new people and made a couple new friends recently. I dont really see how that would help this situation at all ......
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Purefilth

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i turn on the xbox for a bit, concentrate on simulated killing for an hour or so, turn it off, clear head :)
 

Chamber36

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Meditation is how I clear my head.

The first technique I'd do is close my eyes, look up into my skull and try to "feel" my pineal gland inside my brain. If I do this I'll see a little nut. Then I just focus on it.

What might calm you down more though is to just focus on your breathing. I usually don't inhale or exhale too deep, I just let the air flow through me the way it should. It helps me to stay calm when I remind myself to breath calmly. Helps me appear more calm as well. Since I started that meditation a few weeks ago I even check out how women breath to get a better read on their state of mind.
 

SgtSplacker

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I meditate all the time. Meditation is basically just not thinking about anything for as long as you can. Basically just sit or lay comfortably, relax, see how long it takes you to inhale without straining, so inhale, hold your breath for as long as it takes you to inhale normally, then exhale taking the time of three inhales. Do this while clearing your mind. You can use any immobile object as a focus or just focus on a white light in your chest or something. I don't use anything myself and try to be empty for as long as you can. At first you will only be able to keep your thoughts clear for maybe 30 seconds, practice man.

Scientific study has shown that meditation increases the folds in your brain tissue and those folds have to do with increased mental function. This is super good for you dude. I use this technique when I can't sleep too...
 

Chamber36

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SgtSplacker said:
Scientific study has shown that meditation increases the folds in your brain tissue and those folds have to do with increased mental function. This is super good for you dude. I use this technique when I can't sleep either...
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/01/28/how-meditation-may-change-the-brain/

Holy crap, you're right.

I've just started studying Psychobiology at the University of Amsterdam, so I am pretty interested in learning stuff like that. Info like that will give me a one-up on my peers.
 

SgtSplacker

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The Splacker has spoken and it will be so...
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Atom Smasher

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yuppaz said:
Read eckard tolle
1) Read Eckard Tolle
2) Start to lose grip on reality
3) Go insane
4) Join RSD

Tongue is in cheek, but just a little... ;)
 

Atom Smasher

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OP, your answer is as follows:

Everywhere you go, live to have fun and create an enjoyable experience for you and the people around you. Consciously choose to provide a fun experience for you and for others within your sphere. It works.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

JohnChops

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Atom Smasher said:
OP, your answer is as follows:

Everywhere you go, live to have fun and create an enjoyable experience for you and the people around you. Consciously choose to provide a fun experience for you and for others within your sphere. It works.

That's really good advice atom. Recently (last week ) I actually have found myself being a lot happier and doing what I want with my life. For example I just do it, like with talking to new people. I've made a lot of new friends in the course of two weeks with my new attitude and I actually like where my life is going.

With creating this experience life is for sure more enjoyable.
 

SeymourCake

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Meditate. Sit down, either on the floor or chair. Erect your spine, clasp your fingers, shoulders back and relaxed. Close your eyes, and focus on your breath. Your mind should be 100% focused on the inhalation and exhalation of the breath coming in and out of your nostrils. Do this for about 20-30 minutes a day to refresh your mind.
 

Young Juan

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I often have this issue. I resolve it by acting more impulsively and or instinctively and basically letting my subconscious take over. Yeah, I make some mistakes in the short run but always do better in the long run overall. Thinking about it, I think it has something do with action vs. inertia. The only time I'm in my head is when I'm sitting around or standing around. If I'm at a club, I used to stand around and think "I should go talk to that girl. I think I could open with something about xyz" but not end up actually doing it. Same thing applies to sitting at home and wanting to go do stuff. Nowadays, I make my legs do the walking and I figure it out when I get there. My impulse/instinct/subconscious know what to do and its like I perceive, process, and create simultaneously in real time. Rather than being in my conscious mind and thinking about things I do, I'm just doin me, having fun and letting my subconscious mind take over.

The best part is that I'm doing this with little to no alcohol. I think alcohol AND ESPECIALLY WEED make this issue worse. I don't smoke weed in social situations anymore specifically because I would get soooooo trapped in my own mind and all of my confidence would plummet through the floor.
 

VladPatton

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Give your mind time limits for thinking. 5 mins, 10 mins. When time's up, try to do something of personal gain such as learning something new, physical activity for a better body, getting better at something you know, or just playing PS3/XBox or watching stupid sh!t on YouTube.

A variety of things in little doses helps me to eliminate hours of dedication to thinking about things that I cannot control and making predictions to situations that will never happen or have completely different outcomes.

If it is not making you a better, happier person, why occupy your mental time with it?
 
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