Choosing between 2 women

Dman101

Don Juan
Joined
May 14, 2007
Messages
181
Reaction score
3
I've been dating a very attractive, caring, loyal, good woman who cooks, cleans, has my back, loves me to death and wants to marry me. Shes 33 and I'm 32. The only problem is shes a little more reserved naturally so I realize I had a stronger connection and spark with other women, but shes a great person and would be a good wife. Also our sex life didnt start off too well, I dont *** from sex too often with her, but the sex was getting better as shes trying to do more to keep me. Also my family loves her a lot and like her family.

The problem is throughout our relationship Ive been cheating on her the whole time which she found out about. I've lived my life as a bachelor with multiple women. I still have a few women I can call and get with if I wanted, including 1 who Ive seen on the regular. She doesnt like it, but she accepts me and is willing to deal with it if I really want to be with her long term. Recently she found out about another girl I was in a relationship with the past year and she called this girl and they talked about everything they had going on with me comparing things. The other girl is skinnier, not as pretty but shes good looking, super freaky, very fun, we have better convos, better connection, shes 28, and I realize its more exciting being with her. Girl 2 was the one chasing me trying to see if I'd be serious in the future, I was the one in control and she loved sex with me.

After this incident I was very upset and hurt because I like both girls. The first girl forgave me and wanted to make things work, the 2nd one didnt want to be with me anymore and was upset. I really wanted the 2nd girl back because I enjoyed being with her, so I sent her flowers and a letter, which gave me a chance to talk to her over the phone. She was receptive but texted me a few days later saying she cant do it.

At this point I was upset with the 1st girl for ruining my 2nd girl and I was thinking about the 2nd one everyday I was with the 1st, so I told her I need a week break. During this week, girl 2 was on my mind heavy so I showed up at her house unannounced which surprised her. She was receptive to me and we went to go eat. I told her I broke up with the first one and that girl 1 was more of a friend, we didnt have much of a sex life or connection. She wanted proof and said things like shed text the other girl which I said isnt right because shes hurt right now. Now girl 2 is texting me back and we talked last night like we used to, so Im on track to having her back, but she still questions girl 1, she thinks she'll come back and beg and she doesnt want me to be friends with her. She also wants to make sure I dont have other women.

Now its crunch time. I'm not fully sure if I tried to get girl 2 back just because I lost her or because I want to be with her for real. I know I was very upset thinking I'd never get to be with her again. My break with girl 1 is over on Monday, so I know either I will have to break up with her or break up with girl2. How do I make this decision its so hard.

Basically girl 1 is more loyal, supportive, does more for me, loves me deeper, wont leave even if I cheat, is prettier, more curves, cooks, cleans, and will be a good wife and mother, family loves her, but there isnt a huge spark or a lot of excitement, and I dont really enjoy sex with her that much.

Girl 2 is upbeat, smily, we have great convos, mind blowing sex, shes really into me, we have more fun on trips or just being in the house together, shes a little paranoid about me cheating even before this incident, and I know she wont be ok with me cheating on her.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
 

She makes you weak in the knees.

But she won't give you the time of day.

Here is how to get her.

Prime_Beef

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2014
Messages
141
Reaction score
64
Take it from an older guy who's been where you are, done what you're doing at about your age.

You're wasting your time if you want a serious relationship. You're not being mature. If you stay with the mediocre sex woman, chemistry will be amiss. Further, she will not ever forgive you inspite her words for your transgressions. It will resurface.

The good sex girl sounds like you believe hasn't got life together the way you'd like. It's unlikely to change.

Get rid of both, start again. Find one with a better total package and figure out what you can and cannot compromise on.
 

Scaramouche

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 27, 2008
Messages
3,801
Reaction score
983
Age
80
Location
Australia
Hi Drman,
"So happy I'd be with either were other dear temptress away...",A dilemma as Old as time itself,most DJ's face this at some time or other,it is a "Rite de Passage".....The Emperor Napoleon had a good tactic if not solution to intractable situations...He counselled doing nothing,events have a natural chemistry,with the passing of time the solution is usually solved by one of the involved parties seizing the initiative and forcing a decision...But not always,I have an Old Colleague who,to my certain knowledge,was in just such a triangle for 27 Years,it was resolved by his Wife dropping off her perch...Then,and this has always intrigued me,he and his Lover did not fall into each others arms but,after a couple of months drifted apart and each went their own way,work that one out!
 
Top