"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Choose the Right Victim

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,265
Reaction score
2,644
Location
Texas
Chapter One of Robert Greene's Art of Seduction is Choose the Right Victim.

He reminds us that when we find someone who we really like, it will make our seduction more effortless and it will allow us to get through the resistance that is guaranteed over the course of a relationship.

When you're with a girl you don't like that much, you'll find you actually feel tired more easily. You'll be wondering when she's going to leave. You'll only want to have sex once or twice.

When you're with a girl you really do adore, you'll always feel energized next to her. You won't ever want her to leave. You'll want to have sex indefinitely.

It turns out this matters to the woman. Over time, the woman you have stronger feelings for will feel more beautiful in your presence. This will make the difference between her falling for you and the other guys who are iffy about her.

When you go for the girl you like the most, other girls will become envious of that girl in observing how you interact with her. This will lead you to having several other opportunities.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Urbanyst

Banned
Joined
Jan 28, 2017
Messages
2,382
Reaction score
1,787
Age
42
Location
The City
Easy to say.

But you don't really know how much you like a girl until you date her for a while. Women change over time too.

I have on Ex girlfriend that I really loved and I still miss her to this day. But I miss who she was at the peak of the relationship. She changed a lot down the road. I would never date the present day version of her. But, I would love to be with the younger version of her I met when we started dating. I really miss that version of her.

Maybe this is because all my LTR's were with women 18-26, but women can change dramatically in just one year. Which is why none of my LTR's have lasted longer than one year.
 

Building_and_Loan

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 25, 2014
Messages
413
Reaction score
247
When you're with a girl you don't like that much, you'll find you actually feel tired more easily. You'll be wondering when she's going to leave. You'll only want to have sex once or twice
This pretty much describes my life right now. I've got 2 plates who come over when I want sex, but pretty much regret their presence after I bang them once or twice. Ha I always tell myself I'm going to bang them continuously all night but I just don't feel up to it after a few times, and can't wait for them to leave.

If you're ever at a place where you wish a girl was someone else - end it and move on so you can focus on finding a woman more worth your time. No use in prolonging it.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

ChristopherColumbus

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 8, 2016
Messages
2,263
Reaction score
1,253
Age
59
Location
korea
Greene is talking about seducing women so they are "victims" so to speak because they are being manipulated through their vulnerabilities to fall in love with the seducer.
As long as the word "victim" does not loose the interrogation marks. Because we all know she is not really a victim. Perhaps the man is.:D
 

ChristopherColumbus

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 8, 2016
Messages
2,263
Reaction score
1,253
Age
59
Location
korea
This pretty much describes my life right now. I've got 2 plates who come over when I want sex, but pretty much regret their presence after I bang them once or twice. Ha I always tell myself I'm going to bang them continuously all night but I just don't feel up to it after a few times, and can't wait for them to leave.

If you're ever at a place where you wish a girl was someone else - end it and move on so you can focus on finding a woman more worth your time. No use in prolonging it.
Buyer's remorse? You need to be more patient and prolong your window-shopping moments!:D
 

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
5,416
Reaction score
7,942
Age
57
The chapter about choose the right victim (target), has everything to do with picking an object to seduce who is ripe to your particular presentation.

Doing this well requires self awareness and an ability to perceive unmet needs in the target (that the target may not perceive in themselves).

In that way it's more about the seducer than the seduced. The seducer must understand how to invisibly guide the seduced into the illusion the seducer creates.

It boils down to firstly "Know Thyself" and secondly to knowing the target's psychology.

The Siren is seduced differently than the Prude who is seduced differently than the Drama Queen or the Rescuer.

And the Rake will have less success with the Siren because the Siren will understand well the Rake...but the Rake may have great success with the Prude or the Rescuer (although such success will follow different courses as these two victims have different underlying needs.)

Seduction is sales. You make sales by meeting a need or perceived need. Successful seduction meets the need of the seduced and validates the skill of the seducer.
 

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,265
Reaction score
2,644
Location
Texas
Easy to say.

But you don't really know how much you like a girl until you date her for a while. Women change over time too.
Sometimes you do indeed know how much you like a girl when you first meet. When I first spotted my current girl (now 15 months ago), she was a barmaid and I was standing having a drink. I stopped her and asked if I could order food to go. When I asked her name she extended her hand. As I shook her hand I repeated her name back, and then she asked my name. As I said my name I realized I was still holding her hand (it lasted about 8 seconds and she distinctly remembers the handshake to this day, thinking it felt odd but good at the same time). The second time I saw her was 8 months later. She had different hair color. Instead of my towering 16 inches over her, she was towering 16 inches over me on stage. I didn't recognize her, but I thought "That is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I would do anything for her". Five weeks later I got her number and the next day we kissed, and then two days later I realized that she was the waitress. Ever since then we have had an incredible romance. Our last date we returned to the meeting place (also a 5 star hotel).
I have on Ex girlfriend that I really loved and I still miss her to this day. But I miss who she was at the peak of the relationship. She changed a lot down the road. I would never date the present day version of her. But, I would love to be with the younger version of her I met when we started dating. I really miss that version of her.

Maybe this is because all my LTR's were with women 18-26, but women can change dramatically in just one year. Which is why none of my LTR's have lasted longer than one year.
So you know what to look for. She changed 3-6 months later? Did you date more than a year? (Oh, I see not but I predicted this). That version of her might be annual. People change over the course of the year. There are four phases: You're giving and she's giving, You're giving and she's taking, You're taking and she's taking, You're taking and she's giving (this is where most fail).
 

Urbanyst

Banned
Joined
Jan 28, 2017
Messages
2,382
Reaction score
1,787
Age
42
Location
The City
Sometimes you do indeed know how much you like a girl when you first meet. When I first spotted my current girl (now 15 months ago), she was a barmaid and I was standing having a drink. I stopped her and asked if I could order food to go. When I asked her name she extended her hand. As I shook her hand I repeated her name back, and then she asked my name. As I said my name I realized I was still holding her hand (it lasted about 8 seconds and she distinctly remembers the handshake to this day, thinking it felt odd but good at the same time). The second time I saw her was 8 months later. She had different hair color. Instead of my towering 16 inches over her, she was towering 16 inches over me on stage. I didn't recognize her, but I thought "That is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I would do anything for her". Five weeks later I got her number and the next day we kissed, and then two days later I realized that she was the waitress. Ever since then we have had an incredible romance. Our last date we returned to the meeting place (also a 5 star hotel).
That's called lust.

You cannot like someone if you don't know anything about them. You can only like their looks and how they act.

So you know what to look for. She changed 3-6 months later? Did you date more than a year? (Oh, I see not but I predicted this). That version of her might be annual. People change over the course of the year. There are four phases: You're giving and she's giving, You're giving and she's taking, You're taking and she's taking, You're taking and she's giving (this is where most fail).
The give and take rate in a relationship doesn't secure or guarantee anything.

If there was some perfect formula that guaranteed a relationship would last, it would be on breaking News on TV no one would ever break up.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

MrAddiction

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 2, 2016
Messages
371
Reaction score
222
Age
47
I still miss her to this day. But I miss who she was at the peak of the relationship. She changed a lot down the road. I would never date the present day version of her. But, I would love to be with the younger version of her I met when we started dating. I really miss that version of her.
Exactly that. You just described why it is often times so hard to get over an ex for us guys.
 

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,265
Reaction score
2,644
Location
Texas
That's called lust.

You cannot like someone you don't know.
.
After 15 months??

My instincts were validated (as she initiates for the 7th time in a row, asking me out for tonight).
 

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,265
Reaction score
2,644
Location
Texas
Exactly that. You just described why it is often times so hard to get over an ex for us guys.
If there was some perfect formula that guaranteed a relationship would last, it would be on breaking News on TV no one would ever break up.
Says the person who confesses they never had a one year relationship, regarding my 14 month relationship and relationship app.

Do you aspire to be demonstrably false?
 

devilkingx2

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 9, 2013
Messages
4,521
Reaction score
2,229
Location
NYC
Chapter One of Robert Greene's Art of Seduction is Choose the Right Victim.

He reminds us that when we find someone who we really like, it will make our seduction more effortless and it will allow us to get through the resistance that is guaranteed over the course of a relationship.

When you're with a girl you don't like that much, you'll find you actually feel tired more easily. You'll be wondering when she's going to leave. You'll only want to have sex once or twice.

When you're with a girl you really do adore, you'll always feel energized next to her. You won't ever want her to leave. You'll want to have sex indefinitely.

It turns out this matters to the woman. Over time, the woman you have stronger feelings for will feel more beautiful in your presence. This will make the difference between her falling for you and the other guys who are iffy about her.

When you go for the girl you like the most, other girls will become envious of that girl in observing how you interact with her. This will lead you to having several other opportunities.
in my experience when you go for the girl you like the most, you fvck up your game and feel the rejection extra hard, not worth
 

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,265
Reaction score
2,644
Location
Texas
Greene is talking about seducing women so they are "victims" so to speak because they are being manipulated through their vulnerabilities to fall in love with the seducer.
The "victim" argument is a favorite of fat women who don't want to be seduced (as if they need an argument).

in my experience when you go for the girl you like the most, you fvck up your game and feel the rejection extra hard, not worth it.
Not when you are 46 and you can read a woman like a book (and need bifocals). Practice makes perfect.

Extra hard rejection = more pain = more revelation of your inadequacies = more inspiration for self improvement. No pain no gain.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

MrAddiction

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 2, 2016
Messages
371
Reaction score
222
Age
47
Says the person who confesses they never had a one year relationship, regarding my 14 month relationship and relationship app.

Do you aspire to be demonstrably false?
You quoted me - but I can not see any relation to your answer? Could you please explain what you mean?
 

Urbanyst

Banned
Joined
Jan 28, 2017
Messages
2,382
Reaction score
1,787
Age
42
Location
The City
After 15 months??

My instincts were validated (as she initiates for the 7th time in a row, asking me out for tonight).
Not sure what your point is. Can you be more specific about what exactly you are trying to say/prove?

Says the person who confesses they never had a one year relationship, regarding my 14 month relationship and relationship app.

Do you aspire to be demonstrably false?
Do you consider longer relationships to be some kind of accomplishment?

If two people are wrong for each other.. how is dragging it out longer something to brag about?
 

devilkingx2

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 9, 2013
Messages
4,521
Reaction score
2,229
Location
NYC
Do you consider longer relationships to be some kind of accomplishment?

If two people are wrong for each other.. how is dragging it out longer something to brag about?
in theory, the length of your relationships says something about your character and game in that most tricks you learn won't hold up over time so the only way to make a relationship last a long time is on your own
 

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,265
Reaction score
2,644
Location
Texas
Do you consider longer relationships to be some kind of accomplishment?
Yes, the longer a girl stays with you, the better you are. Men should prefer advice from men who have kept women around longer.

I take health advice from healthy people and I take relationship advice from people who maintain relationships.

Women want the guy who gets the girl. A man who can have any girl will pick out the woman that he loves the most. He will make it clear that she is his favorite girl, and she is.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Top