"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Chip Implants To Prove Infidelity

Desdinova

Master Don Juan
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Commit-Tech is a tiny chip that will be implanted at the tip of the penis on the man and the vulva of the woman. These two microchips will be synced together with an app that is installed on your cell phone. If at any time, one of these chips is involved in any sexual activity without the other chip, it will alert the partners cell phone that the other has been cheating.

So if you leave the bytch, she can find out how much ass you're getting after she's gone :D

http://now8news.com/new-implant-alert-cheating/
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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