Cheated On Her Boyfriend..

[todays_news]

I met this girl last night, both quite drunk.. but to cut a long story short I ended up getting with her and going back to hers and staying the night.

I didnt bone her, but we had a hand party and slept naked together in a spoon position.

Its just another girl, but she has a boyfriend whose 10 years older than me, and I'm not sure how I feel about that. We spent the day mucking around in bed together just playing or chatting, and agreed we should be friends which I'm cool with as I dont want anything serious with anyone atm.

The thing is, I've never got with somebody with a boyfriend before and I feel absolutely sick with myself for being the guy somebody cheats with. It was only last night, but I've felt guilty about it since I left.

I thought it'd be interesting to hear everyones thoughts on the way I've acted, its obviously not amicable.. but would you guys of done the same?

Because next time I hear a girl has a bf, I'm running a ****ing mile.

 

[Lord Sidious]

Slept naked together...
Didn´t bang her...
Agreed to be friend of her´s after that...


Nice job, dude...! I guess you did the hardest thing you could have done - not to f*** her...

When it comes to the situation of potencially f****** a chick, either you´re hot or cold. You should never be warm. I mean, either you f*** her, or you walk away. Not sleeping naked with her without boning her.


So, my opinion is: - you should see if everything is alright with you.

 

[Forty0ztoFreedom]

Not sleeping naked with her without boning her.

Why? Whats wrong with sleeping with a naked girl? Are we that jaded where its f-close or nothing matters?

 

[5string]

Some will disagree, but wtf are you messing around with a woman who has a boyfriend for? Would I have done the same? Absolutely not. Find a single gal. There are plenty to go around.

 

[Don Wha]

What's the point in sleeping naked with a girl and not boning her? You might as well lay there with your clothes ON.

But to answer the OP question...

Find a single gal. There are plenty to go around.

^^ This.

Everyone's morals are different. Personally, I TRY to stay away from girls with a bf. But if I'm drunk and they're really asking for it.... what can ya do?

 

[todays_news]

I thought it'd be interesting to hear everyones thoughts on the way I've acted, its obviously not amicable.. but would you guys of done the same?

Slept naked together...
Didn´t bang her...
Agreed to be friend of her´s after that...


Nice job, dude...! I guess you did the hardest thing you could have done - not to f*** her...

When it comes to the situation of potencially f****** a chick, either you´re hot or cold. You should never be warm. I mean, either you f*** her, or you walk away. Not sleeping naked with her without boning her.


So, my opinion is: - you should see if everything is alright with you.

Well thankyou for that but what you have just said, has nothing to do with what I asked. I dont want your silly analysis on fvcking her, as pvssy as it sounds I would feel terrible if I fvcked another man's girlfriend. Remember, what goes around, comes around.

 

[Kailex]

It seems like you knew she had a boyfriend BEFORE you got yourself into her bed. Am I wrong? I want to know because you didn't offer specifics.

If that is the case, then you are a human contradiction.

If you knew she had a boyfriend from the beginning, and you seem to be morally conflicted about this... then why follow her to her room and lay naked with her?

Okay, you were drunk. FINE. But the next day you spent the whole day with her. So obviously you weren't TOO stricken with grief at the fact that you made her cheat. And yes, she did cheat, even if you guys didn't have sex. You had a hand party... whatever the hell that means (pattycake?).

What are you really asking? Are you asking if you should be feeling guilty or whether you made a moral mistake? Did this situation shake the foundation of your very self?

I think you are just very confused because you seem to "think" one way and then "acted" a completely different way. Had it been me, #1, I wouldn't have done it. But had it happened, as soon as the morning came and I woke up, I would have bolted. I'd rather spend my time on single women, but if I ever made the mistake of laying one with a boyfriend, I am definitely not going to stick around... hell, probably not even stay the night. That's what her boyfriend is for... to muck and play around.

BTW, if she brought up the conversation of just being friends, it's probably because you didn't go further with her. Just my guess. So don't worry about this girl, she probably won't be bringing you back to her place again, anyway.

 

[Sir Psycho Sexy]

rep+

But next time get her to actually cheat on him all the way.

And I never lay around(mucking?) in bed the next day or even spend the night with a girl unless im dating her. If you want to thats fine, I just think its a big waste of time.

And I agree with what Kailex had to say, she put you in the friend zone because you didnt fvck her.

Dont be afraid to have morals different from what society deems "normal" and "the right thing to do"

 

[todays_news]

Well the reason we stayed in bed.. I dont really know just hung out I guess, I'm quite sociable so I dont mind doing that kind of thing with women. This isnt going anywhere, so I didnt see the harm in it. Plus she made bacon sandwiches this morning, and you dont say no to bacon.

As for the friend zoning, im not bothered by it, yeah i feel a bit bad for the poor guy she's with, but the main point of constructing this thread was to essentially gather peoples opinions getting with girls with bf's. And so far the general consensus seems to be that its not to be done.

She mentioned she had a bf before we got into bed, had I been sober it would not have happened initially.

 

[Kailex]

She mentioned she had a bf before we got into bed, had I been sober it would not have happened initially.

This is my whole point. You weren't drunk the whole next day.

You KNEW, when you woke up, that she had a boyfriend and could consciously make a decision to leave. Yes, you don't say NO to bacon, but you could have jetted after that.

Instead, you spent the whole day with her even after knowing that she had a boyfriend. Not everyone shares the same view on whether to be with with a girl with a boyfriend, but you're contradicting yourself by saying that you aren't fine with it, but then spending the whole day with her, the very next day. Whether you had sex or not isn't the issue, what's the core of the issue here is that you betrayed your own beliefs. Had you been drunk and woken up and realized your actions and then jetted, then that's understandable.

I think subconsciously, you are just justifying the fact that you were with her because you two ended up as friends.

If you really don't want to see women with bf's, just make sure you stick to your side of the spectrum next time.

 

[kingsam]

an improtant consideration is WHY is she cheating on her bf??

yues i agree with 5strings reply - any reason = her lack of integrity, she is worth very little

 

[5string]

an improtant consideration is WHY is she cheating on her bf??

Maybe a flaw in her character? Simply amounts to nothing more than evidence that she is damaged, and should be tossed aside like a wet dishrag.

 

[vatoloco]

but the main point of constructing this thread was to essentially gather peoples opinions getting with girls with bf's.

Depends on the timing of the confession and what it is that you're looking for.

If she told me right off the bat, I wouldn't get involved with her at all. Too much drama. Plus it's bad karma, man.

If she told me after I boned her, then I'd just Donkey Punch her. Just kidding! I'd say "Oh that's cool" and never contact her again.

If you're just looking for a fling, I guess it's up to you. Just be careful. STDs and all.

Definitely not LTR material (even if she dropped the BF). I would not be able to trust her.

 

[marinetti]

You didn't know she had a bf. You found out later. Played it cool. I don't see any problems here. But obviously you're upset with yourself. So a have a couple pieces of advice.

1) Don't drink so much. Perhaps you're feeling guilty over that. So cut back next time you're out.

2) Don't take responsibility for her actions. I'm going to guess that if she was willing to drunkenly go home with you, her relationship isn't in very good shape. You did not cause any damage to the relationship. The damage was already there. If it wasn't you it would've been someone else.

So try and absolve yourself here.

 

[Forty0ztoFreedom]

What's the point in sleeping naked with a girl and not boning her? You might as well lay there with your clothes ON.

So if early 2000's Jessica Alba walks into your room and offers to lay in bed with you naked, you see it as a waste of time?

 

[marinetti]

So if early 2000's Jessica Alba walks into your room and offers to lay in bed with you naked, you see it as a waste of time?

LOL it's not a waste of time at all.

Now is it different for 2010 Jessica Alba? What if they BOTH came in? Would you have a threesome with them? :crazy:

 

[DavenJuan]

So if early 2000's Jessica Alba walks into your room and offers to lay in bed with you naked, you see it as a waste of time?

Forty..

what difference does it make WHO you were laying with?

Ill let you guys debate whether or not its pointless to lay naked vs clothed.. my concern for YOU forty, is the frame of thinking that this situation should be changed based on WHO you are laying with.

isnt a waste of time ...a waste of time if you are spending that "TIME" the same way..??

this is the same type of EXEMPTION guys give girls they find attractive and start making excuses for treating her "different".

my intentions arent to derail this thread, but even a small statement like that easily poisons the mind of others thinking

 

[Lord Sidious]

Why? Whats wrong with sleeping with a naked girl? Are we that jaded where its f-close or nothing matters?

I don´t know about you, but in his scenario (getting in bed naked with a chick that allowed that, just to chat or even just for hand parties) it´s completly nonsense. But, we do all have our preferences and ideas...

(...) I dont want your silly analysis on fvcking her, as pvssy as it sounds.

Sorry, bro, but that is what it sounds like...! I still prefer my "silly" idea about getting in bed naked with a gal...

I would feel terrible if I fvcked another man's girlfriend. Remember, what goes around, comes around.

Yeah, right....! You said you got in bed naked with her, hand parties...Tell me, isn´t that cheating also? Let us imagine a scenario: your girlfriend gets drunk and takes a guy to her place. After a while she gets naked with that guy in bed with hand parties. Wouldn´t you consider that as cheating?

It´s the same principle as killing someone: if you kill one person or hundreds is still crime all the same.

Next time, act differently. If it´s a question of moral, simply don´t do that again. Or, if you simply decide to advance, go all the way, and then, deal with the consequences.

Like I wrote before, hot or cold.

 

[Forty0ztoFreedom]

Forty..

what difference does it make WHO you were laying with?

Ill let you guys debate whether or not its pointless to lay naked vs clothed.. my concern for YOU forty, is the frame of thinking that this situation should be changed based on WHO you are laying with.

isnt a waste of time ...a waste of time if you are spending that "TIME" the same way..??

this is the same type of EXEMPTION guys give girls they find attractive and start making excuses for treating her "different".

my intentions arent to derail this thread, but even a small statement like that easily poisons the mind of others thinking

I just like naked girls I guess, especially if its one I'm attracted to. I'm not saying I wouldn't want to have sex instead, I'm just saying I don't consider it a waste of time!

Plus, this guy was drunk with this girl, and its late night. What is he gonna do? "Sorry but if we're not fvcking I should really go hit some P90X or something."

 

[Miles28]

I don't understand the guilt part. SHE is the one with the boyfriend and she is the one who has made a commitment, not you. Surely it's up to her to honor that if she so chooses or feel guilty about it (or not) if she doesn't?

If it wasn't you it would be some other guy that she cheated with. Don't beat yourself up about it. A lot of girls have boyfriends, if you're playing the field it's more than likely you'll end up hooking up with some of them, even if you don't know it.