Charisma

[Anaxibios]

A lot of people in this forum talk about charisma and charm.

I have read a few excellent posts on this subject, but i was wondering how most people view this subject.

What constitutes charisma? What skills can be learned to increase it's power?

I think that this is a very important skill in all areas of life, from getting jobs to picking up women.


Thank you for taking the time to read this post and think about this subject.

 

[Soma]

Funny you should post this. I recently bought a book on developing Charisma. The book does an excellent job of explaining the intangible aspects of it all. Plus it gives you exercises and tests to score your current level and shows how to improve.

The book is in my car right now so I don't remember the exact name but it's something like: Charisma; the seven keys to somethign something something.

The Author I do remember. It's Tony Allesandra. He also wrote The Platinum Rule.

 

[Lifeforce]

I feel being humble is a very strong factor off charisma. What I mean by this is that you do not brag about your archievements, what you got and stuff like that. Some people will brag about their car and how good they are at something, but they do it because they want to impress. Deep down it's a lack off something.

Bragging will only antagonize people. I never do it (except here ) and it really does make people be drawn to me IRL. I do not challenge them so they feel they are below me instead I do never really talk about my archievements in real life. I leave it up to them to discover if they want, either way I do not care. However most people are somewhat "Ohh I didn't know you could do that". I feel it's important that other people than yourself tell how good you are to other people. That draw people to you.

Another thing I've noticed is that you should not strive to get charisma, you will never get it this way. Only by not caring about it and never try to prove to people how good you are can you get it. Have your own goals, your own world and let people join it. Why do people want charisma? To glorify themselves, it just means they lack something deep down if this is the reason. How do people get charisma? Not wanting to glorify themselves because they already are content and that draws people to them.

And lastly, giving respect and trust to the right people and really listen to those people is a very good traits to have. Most people like feeling important and being respected for who they are.

 

[jakethasnake]

Originally posted by Soma
Funny you should post this. I recently bought a book on developing Charisma. The book does an excellent job of explaining the intangible aspects of it all. Plus it gives you exercises and tests to score your current level and shows how to improve.

The book is in my car right now so I don't remember the exact name but it's something like: Charisma; the seven keys to somethign something something.

The Author I do remember. It's Tony Allesandra. He also wrote The Platinum Rule.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/s...hor=Anthony J. Alessandra/102-5868807-3304919


Click the link - it's to all of Allessandra's books on Amazon.com. Which one are you reading?

 

[Titus]

Originally posted by Lifeforce
Another thing I've noticed is that you should not strive to get charisma, you will never get it this way. Only by not caring about it and never try to prove to people how good you are can you get it. Have your own goals, your own world and let people join it. Why do people want charisma? To glorify themselves, it just means they lack something deep down if this is the reason. How do people get charisma? Not wanting to glorify themselves because they already are content and that draws people to them.

Eh? What are you talking about?

Not caring builds charisma???? What the...??

Look... charisma is a pure bodily funtion. It's a form of an energy buble that has nothing to do with your way of thinking. It derives from the seven energy centers in your body (populary called chakras) and their strength. The stronger and cleaner they are, the more they attract.

So, If you want a bigger charisma, go and do some chakra fitness. That's all it takes. How you percieve people and your life does NOTHING to strengthen it.

 

[Lifeforce]

Obviously the way we think has effect on our charisma or I would not have wrote the stuff I did.

 

[Titus]

Originally posted by Lifeforce
Obviously the way we think has effect on our charisma or I would not have wrote the stuff I did.

No. It does not. Our "thinking" center is located in our third energy center, in the place where the lower part of our belly is. And that chakra is only 1/7 of the whole process. It alone is useless and it means squat to building up your aura. But if all the rest are also in the running and all combined, then the magic starts flowing. It's like those chrismas tree lights: they all work -or if one fails- none works.

Your aura (charisma is just a word for a strong aura) does change thou. All the time, with your thinking. Just like moods swing. But NOT strengthen. For that, do some Osho's exercises. Those will really build up your aura.

 

[Lifeforce]

That must give the saying "men think with their gut" a whole new meaning. :]

According to your belief my experience hasn't happened because I am obviously wrong in my thinking and in my belief. Let's just settle with there are different ways of looking at the truth, because this argument will never lead us anywhere.

 

[check_mate_kid_uk]

when you walk in the room and every one feels your presence and looks in ore, and if when you talk the listenrs feel you are talking to them personaly despite the fact there is a whole crowd listiining, that my freind is charisma.

 

[B9]

'not caring' is perhaps not an entirely accurate definition. I'd say resting in oneself is one of the primary factors if charisma. Unlike 'not caring' you can't really fake that.

 

[ScrewIt]

wtf are you guys talking about. it has nothing to do with not caring. not caring goes into all sorts of personalities and types. lets look into this, what's the real definition of charisma?? well if you dont know here it is

1. A rare personal quality attributed to leaders who arouse fervent popular devotion and enthusiasm.
2. Personal magnetism or charm: a television news program famed for the charisma of its anchors.

n : a personal attractiveness that enables you to influence others

A lot of people have a vague meaning of charisma but it's basically your whole package which is charismatic. Body Language, smooth talker, witty & smart, charmer, those are the main aspects of it. usually if you're charismatic, you can cheer ppl up in the worst situations cause of your extensive knowledge in smooth talking.

lets look at some examples of actors or stars that you believe to be charismatic, although its just an act on movies or shows, lets look at it.

The first on my list would probably be the guy that does those 007 movies. there are others, im sure u can think of some.

 

[Alpine]

Know any ugly blokes with charisma?

I think the Halo effect has a lot to do with it. Whatever they do it is perceived positively.

Also chakras? my arse.

Do you think John Wayne or James Bond even knew what a chakra was?

I actually don't think anybody knows what the formula for charisma is.

 

[ScrewIt]

no one really does. either you have it or you dont. And if you dont, i doubt it would be easy to figure "it" out and get it.

One notion i do have is that you would probably have to be goodlooking to be charismatic.

You're building an image of yourself inside people's minds. What more to give you charisma than to be admired by people who find you attractive (which they incorporate into successful and a leader)

 

[frivolousz21]

I Will tell you this..Ive never met anyone who has just built Charisma.....some people have it or not.

I always had it..I remember being a kid...and having everyone watch me and see what im doing because of the charisma..

I had no game in hs..but I got the hottest girls because of this.

but it can be lost with insecurity..after that I fell to rock bottom...and lost this ability..I have it back...infact I think its more now than ever. Charisma to me is simple.

Be happy, speak ur mind! thats what i do...and it works.

 

[Anaxibios]

Interesting Idea

There are a lot of interesting ideas here... I am not sure about the chakras, but I would like to think that charisma is not a thing that one is born with, rather a part of your personality and something that can be developed...

I really like Lifeforce's ideas; it would be nice to have this lead from being humble, very little ever does.

I think confidence is also a necessity

 

[Anaxibios]

btw, I don't think that good looks are a necessity for charisma; it may help build confidence in one's self, but look at how many politicians are charismatic (yes, they may be false, but no one can deny the effect). And some are definitely not very handsome (Cretien, Clinton, Churchill to name a few).

Also, Hitler was definitely not the most handsome leader, but his charisma was undeniable (he also had some rather... poor personality triats). Thousands of people were enthralled at every one of his speeches (i have talked with people who attended some).

 

[frivolousz21]

confidence is the pinnicle of success.

no matter how bad u are with game....if you are confident you will naturally teach urself ways to get good with the ladies

 

[Titus]

Allright, we got the ball rolling!

Look boys, let's get one thing straight. How many of you have ever even tried any form of meditation? Or relaxation methods? Or have many of you have ever even tried working on your own energy centers? Because all of this is the basis for your aura and building up your charisma with it.

I've been in this buisness for a long time and believe me, i know 100% sure what i am talking about when i am saying aura, chakras and charisma.

Ok, on with the discussion.

Originally posted by ScrewIt
wtf are you guys talking about. it has nothing to do with not caring. not caring goes into all sorts of personalities and types. lets look into this, what's the real definition of charisma?? well if you dont know here it is

1. A rare personal quality attributed to leaders who arouse fervent popular devotion and enthusiasm.
2. Personal magnetism or charm: a television news program famed for the charisma of its anchors.

n : a personal attractiveness that enables you to influence others

True. Magnetism, attractivness, leadership ability... all true. But tell me, where does, looking only at your body, it come from? What is the source of all that magnetism from within your body? Where does it friggin come FROM?

That't right. The magical 7 chakras that run so many of your bodily funtions. That is where the magnetism comes from and that is what your need to work on if you want CHARISMA.

Originally posted by Alpine

Also chakras? my arse.

Do you think John Wayne or James Bond even knew what a chakra was?

An interesting point. Does somebody that owns a body of Brad Pitt without ever even lifting one single weight in his entire life needs to know what fitness is?

Those lucky bastards never had to know what a chakra is! Theirs were strong as steel from their birth on! Just like this frivolousz dude here. Does he need to know what a chakra is? Hell no! He inherited strong ones from his parents!

But what about us "average" Joes that were born with mediocre chakras and auras that do not stick out much? Well... we have quite some energy fitness to do before we reach the level of someone like Friv here or John Wayne. It's just like muscles. They need exercise to grow.

Originally posted by Alpine
I actually don't think anybody knows what the formula for charisma is

I know what it's formula is. You don't have to believe me if you do not want to, but i'm not telling you facts that i've read or heard but what i have done myself. If you want a stronger aura, go do some Osho's exercises.
That's all it takes. *crosses his heart*

Originally posted by Anaxibios
I am not sure about the chakras, but I would like to think that charisma is not a thing that one is born with, rather a part of your personality and something that can be developed...

You are born with a set of chakras that grow and develop with certain age. You can be born with strong or weak ones and thus being weak or strong from the start.

And charisma is not a part of your "personality." It is merely a showout, on the outside, of the state of your 7 energy centers, of their strenght and cleaness.

Personality is linked with your ego and that is only one small portion of one of the seven centers. And as i said, you need all of them to work, or none work at all.

 

[Lifeforce]

Ok, I feel my point has been very distorted here. Let me explain my belief on the subject and take the traits from the charismatic people I have met.

What I meant by not caring is not to strive for charisma, at least not in the open. People who try to fake will be seen through and made a mockery off. That's one part off it.

Being humble is a kind of a way to display some form of mystery, you do not reveal yourself. You let your actions speak instead of your words. Basically a need not to be best all the time. To let people discover themselves because the person has no interest in vanity like that. It's powerful i tell you.

Charismatic people also are very open and display their need for intimacy in another way. They are human, less repressed than we are. They say stuff we do not dare to say and they display things we do not dare to do. I met this girl who would smile at me and then she gave me a hug after just meeting me. It was very strange experience. Most girls are very closed and on alert first time off meeting a new person.

They also treat people like they matter. They listen thoroughly to what is said and really care about the person. I remeber a previous oneitis of mine who was very charismatic, she would treat everyone the same and would never look down on people. And she was very beautiful too in the words true sense.

Self confidence is very important too and especially being content in the true fashion of content. Some people say they are happy but aren't these people live life and you can see that stuff in their face. They will become a beacon off light which people will want to be close so they can feel happy too. The girl that hugged me was radiating happiness.

Devotion can also add to charisma, having something you believe very strongly in. Take Ghandi for example, that person had charisma like hell. Watch the movie by the same name.

 

[Titus]

Originally posted by Lifeforce
Ok, I feel my point has been very distorted here. Let me explain my belief on the subject and take the traits from the charismatic people I have met.

I think nothing had been distored. You write very openly and warm to heart which is quite hard to distort.

Originally posted by Lifeforce
What I meant by not caring is not to strive for charisma, at least not in the open. People who try to fake will be seen through and made a mockery off. That's one part off it.

You're right. Charisma can't be faked. But strengthening it is not mockery either It's for real. When it comes, it's there. It shines and no mockery is needed.

Originally posted by Lifeforce
Being humble is a kind of a way to display some form of mystery, you do not reveal yourself. You let your actions speak instead of your words. Basically a need not to be best all the time. To let people discover themselves because the person has no interest in vanity like that. It's powerful i tell you.

Charismatic people also are very open and display their need for intimacy in another way. They are human, less repressed than we are. They say stuff we do not dare to say and they display things we do not dare to do. I met this girl who would smile at me and then she gave me a hug after just meeting me. It was very strange experience. Most girls are very closed and on alert first time off meeting a new person.

They also treat people like they matter. They listen thoroughly to what is said and really care about the person. I remeber a previous oneitis of mine who was very charismatic, she would treat everyone the same and would never look down on people. And she was very beautiful too in the words true sense.

Self confidence is very important too and especially being content in the true fashion of content. Some people say they are happy but aren't these people live life and you can see that stuff in their face. They will become a beacon off light which people will want to be close so they can feel happy too. The girl that hugged me was radiating happiness.

Devotion can also add to charisma, having something you believe very strongly in. Take Ghandi for example, that person had charisma like hell. Watch the movie by the same name.

As i said, you can warm a guy's heart with what you write. It's all true... people with strong auras are like beacons of light that attract everyting around them. And if charisma is combined with a warm, loving personality... that is something so beautiful to behold that no words can even come close to describing it.
My tutor that enrolled me into this energy buisness is like that... she's a true angel in every sense of the word.Her will and confidence are as strong as steel... while her body, her gestures and her way of speech are as light as a feather. It's truly incredible. I know only three people like that and all of them have been practising meditation in all forms for most of their lives.

But still... there is something that i feel i must object to your post. No hard feelings of course. You seem like a nice enough guy

You write the truth. But your write what is real for those who are ALREADY very charismatic, or in other words, were BORN with strong auras. Because your aura is something that cannot in any way be influenced by your mind (mood swings are all that change. Happy, angry, loving, not loving. While it's force remains the same all the time.) or your actions. It's simply there and it does it's thing either you like it or not. And you describe only the lucky bastard ones... while forgetting the average Joes.