Causes of Oneitis

[Miss]

Just curious as to what some girls do to cause Oneitis and what others do that make it easy to next them.

 

[joekerr31]

oneitis isn't caused by anything anyone does. IF it were there were be multiple guys with oneitis over the same woman.

oneitis is a mystery. it just happens out of the blue with no explanation.

now lust, which is very different than oneitis, is easy to create.

not to get all new agey on folks - but i believe oneitis occurs to help us learn something about ourselves. it teaches us how to be to see what we always wanted (even its an illusion) and to be able to find the inner strength to carry on in life without it.

 

[Last Man Standing]

"Oneitis" is an overwhelming desire to be with one woman. for whatever reason! A married man has "Oneitis",obviously!

 

[grinder]

Are you nuts? Give out THAT secret to a girl? LOL

That secret is staring you in the face (only in reverse) all over this board.

Think about it, where do you think some of the basic tenets of DJism came from? Who is it that learns to be mysterious, unpredictable, “play hard to get” and be the “prize” from an early age.

Is it little boys? Nope. Only one guess left.

If either sex is able to get the right combination of the above, with the right timing, in the right circumstance, and with the correct amount of aplomb, guess what CAN happen?

All I can tell you is if you had a sensitive-enough microphone I swear you could hear a snapping sound in the head and heart of the recipient of the OneItis when it is triggered.

Get the above recipe wrong and, pooff, nothing. NEXT!

Their really are way too many variables to figure out why certain combinations work differently on different people (male and female) at different times and with different intensities.

I’m sure we’ve all been in situations where we’ve had someone chasing us and we wondered, hoped, we could figure out WTF we did to get THAT one after us.

This forum tells you what the ingredients are, even gives you instructions on how to combine them.

DJ Kit……. “Some Assembly Required”

 

[RedPill]

oneitis isn't caused by anything anyone does. IF it were there were be multiple guys with oneitis over the same woman.

oneitis is a mystery. it just happens out of the blue with no explanation.

I disagree dude. It doesn't just happen out of the blue, it happens when a guy creates an obsessive idealization of a chick in his mind. There are many causes. For instance, he might do this because he's desperate, has a scarcity mentality in regard to women, or feels he's obligated to get married by a certain age. There are more possible causes.

At the end of the day, it's a weak psychological frame of reference and a lack of options that reinforce the oneitis. Joe, to what you said about multiple guys with the same women, this happens all the time. A good illustration of this can be seen in the movie There's Something About Mary. All the guys are idealizing and obsessed with Cameron Diaz (except Brett Favre) because of her hotness, great personality, and naiveté to it all. I'd venture to say we've all come across chicks who are like this in real life. They are AFC magnets and leave a whole trail of guys with oneitis in their wake. While Mary might be on the far end of the spectrum, it's the same oneitis. Some chicks, most notably the attention junkies, play up the idealization factor to create a harem of chumps who will provide for free. We've all seen girls like this too.

I always get a good laugh out of guys (including myself from the distant past) who have oneitis over a chick who's not that hot. This is the 'everyday' oneitis you can see everytime you leave the house. That Onion piece a few months ago had me in tears because you see this garbage and the drama associated with it all over the place.

And Puert...er...Last Man Standing, not all guys have oneitis (obsessive idealization) for their wife. I think it's fair to say most do though because they subscribe to the AFC belief system when it comes to relationships, love, and marriage.

 

[insidious]

That Onion piece = friggin' hilarious!



Anways, oneitis...

who knows, as with Alzheimer's Disease, the causes are many, unknown and strangely elusive leaving much room for spirited debate.

My theory?

Oneitis = lack of sense of control over one's own life and actions.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

There are a LOT of precursors to ONEitis and a lot of associated AFC behaviors that come as a result of ONEitis, but the cause of ONEitis can almost universally be traced back to one common factor - a complete lack or severe deficit of any viable options with regards to other women.The guy who knows (both consciously and unconsciously) only one woman is potentially available for him to meet his need for sexual intimacy will necessisarily idealize her.

I realize I always come back to Plate Theroy when it comes to ONEitis, but it's proven true time and again; the more plates you have spinning simultaneously is directly proportional to developing ONEitis. A man without options becomes necessitous, and necessitous men are never free. A lack of viable options (i.e. more non-exclusive women) combined with men's natural propensity to avoid rejection is a veritable recipe for ONEitis.

 

[Kings_royalty]

Just curious as to what some girls do to cause Oneitis

Girls don't 'cause' Oneitis, men do...it's all in their head. Sure, I believe you can't help who you are attracted to(as D.D. says), but raising that attraction to the level of oneitis rests on his shoulders.

 

[Kev07]

oneitis is most commonly seen when a guy who does not have much female attention finds a girl who gives him her time of the day. he'll be so awestruck by finally getting attention from a girl that he will fall into oneitis

 

[PigAdlemPimp]

Dudes who don't attract many hot babes develop oneitis because of both their fear of not being able to secure a similar type of relationship with a babe of that level of beauty for a very long period of time due to their desire for a regular fvck.
Hot babes can develop oneitis as well, why I don't know, but I guess they have the fantasy of meeting the perfect guy and when they think that they have they try to cling to him.
I will never have oneitis because I can't handle being arround the same hot babe for long periods of time.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Just curious as to what some girls do to cause Oneitis and what others do that make it easy to next them.

The problem of oneitis is related to the man, not the woman.

The basic root cause is lack of confidence. I stand strongly by that. When you're confident, you know that if it doesn't work out with this girl, you have the ability to easily find another girl. So you don't develop oneitis. However, when you're not confident, you do not believe you'll find another girl, so you cling onto the current one out of desperation.

 

[djbr]

I don't know why, but I thought this thread was in the Mature Man forum and I was not answering because of that. Well...

There are a LOT of precursors to ONEitis and a lot of associated AFC behaviors that come as a result of ONEitis, but the cause of ONEitis can almost universally be traced back to one common factor - a complete lack or severe deficit of any viable options with regards to other women.The guy who knows (both consciously and unconsciously) only one woman is potentially available for him to meet his need for sexual intimacy will necessisarily idealize her.

One thing I noticed with some people I know is that usually they're also trying to fill some void in themselves.

I have a friend who is a REAL AFC with his girlfriend, who dumps and takes him back as she wishes. He has some qualities that make all the women want him badly. He got with some of the most beautiful girls I know, but still, he just wants her and dumped them all for a tiny little chance that he and his oneitis might get back together. This guy feels like he is "incomplete" without her, and he convinces himself that she is the only person who can fulfill this void.

It's always the same thing: they get together. She dumps him. He starts to get serious attention from HBs, but only want her. She notices that. They get back together.

I realize I always come back to Plate Theroy when it comes to ONEitis, but it's proven true time and again; the more plates you have spinning simultaneously is directly proportional to developing ONEitis. A man without options becomes necessitous, and necessitous men are never free. A lack of viable options (i.e. more non-exclusive women) combined with men's natural propensity to avoid rejection is a veritable recipe for ONEitis.

I agree with all of this, but still, sometimes the guy do have options and is so conditioned to believe he is not complete without someone that he goes as far as he can to be with one single woman who idealizes his perception of what is missing in him.

 

[Miss]

@RedPill

RedPill ---> I really enjoyed reading your comments. Thanks.

 

[pvf94]

Guy likes girl
Girl starts talking to guy
Guy thinks about girl 24/7
She becomes his main focus throughout the day...
Every little Plus she gives him he focus's on hardcore.
Than she deprives of attention, or things dont go guys way
Guy end's up wanting what he seemingly cant have, or what he wants is out of the question.....therefore, he thinks about girl even more, trying to think of a way to get her attention, or to get her out on a date and so on.

I would know =P Ive fell victim many times But im good now. =)

 

[penkitten]

the cause is lack of pirates.
if our world had more pirates, there would be very little oneitis.

 

[Badmannaz]

........................

 

[pvf94]

the cause is lack of pirates.
if our world had more pirates, there would be very little oneitis.

^^^:crackup:

 

[jonwon]

Just curious as to what some girls do to cause Oneitis and what others do that make it easy to next them.

girls dont cause oneitus, Love and social ideals and concepts cause oneitus.

Oneitus is placing a massive importance on 'one' person.

read concepts of oneitus.

If your asking how to make men have oneitus for you, or trying to score tips, well i dont think it is something that is pre-planned as a norm, it just is.


women have oneitus too, i would actually state a women can struck with oneitus far more then a man could, women as far as i know social and sociaty infused creatures, so if the 'right' man came along and used her e.t.c i am sure she would be very effected by it.