Caught in the Game

[Jay Jay]

8.30 Friday night. Most people in the trendy city bar have come a straight from work and are now well on the way to being drunk.

I'm spawled on a lounge, the only guy not in a suit, in fact I'm in ripped jeans, an el cheapo jacket I picked up for approx $200 bhat in Bangkok and a pair of chuck taylors. I have two girls either side of me and have my arms spread out Christ-like along the backrest encompassing them all.

We are talking sex. "When they say that a man reaches his sexual peak at 19 they mean the amount of hormones in his system. Not his performance!"

The situation is unacceptable.

Across from me, beyond the small table littered with empty beer and ****atil glasses and full ashtrays is a skinny girl with terrible fashion sense. She has a hand on this guys knee and is leaning in towards him.

If it weren't for the fact that she keeps looking at me it would be a safe bet to say she is totally into this guy.

We've gotten lost in the game. Two proud confident people used to having the other sex bend over backwards for them.

She is always with her friends or a guy. Whenever I join her group she either runs off or starts a conversation with someone else.

She'll sit down next to me and then turn her back on me and talk to some one else... and then lean back against me.

She'll ignore me and then jump into my conversation with an overtly sexual comment.

She'll initiate kino and as soon as I reciprocate will walk away.

AND

If I am talking to another girl (or four) she'll be all over some other dude.

I realise I have fallen into the huge black pools that are her eyes again. Both the girls I am with and the guy she is with shift uncomfortably; they know they have lost us, that they don't really have our attention at all.

They don't know we are stuck in the game, neither of us prepared to be the one to call a truce and its getting worse; sooner or later one of us is going to **** one of these proxies to prove a point.

I want to go over and take her by the hand, lead her up stairs where her friend can't see, slam her against the wall, ravage her.

I wanna grab her next time she heads to the toilet and tell her "lets stop playing these stupid ****ing games..."

But I let things go too far. She (or any woman) could never admit that she is playing this game. Besides, I can't be the one to crack. Girls never understand this...

If I give her what she wants, if I am the one to call a truce then I have submitted to her, if I give her what she wants she won't want it any more.

Besides, I CANNOT reward this kind of behaviour.

My bestfriend's woman is going out with the girls, he's looking after the kids, some of the guys are going round his place to play some poker, smoke some cigars and drinks some beers.

This **** is going nowhere. The night is just heating up but I'm done with this ****. I'd rather hang with the boys then play this **** right now.

I finish off my beer, nod to the four girls and jet. As I walk out I glance back.

Her hands are off the guy's knee already, she's sitting up straight watching me. When she sees me look back at her I get my first genuine smile from her since these stupid ****ing games started.

Its about ten minutes too late.

In my head a voice has already shouted "next."

JJ

 

[Kwello]

I think we've all felt this at one point or another. It's like the entire thrill and fun behind the attraction is the fact that it will never come to fruition. Both of you are too proud to 'lose' and hell... if you did decide to just make a move, you can be sure her interest would fade.

Everyone has to deal with frustration now and then. That's the game, sir.

 

[Phyzzle]

What would happen if you called this chick? Are you thinking she'd enthusiastically agree to meet, then flake out, completely loose interest and dissappear?

I would definitely "give in" and call her up for some alone time. Find out right away where you stand. Wipe that ego off your face! If you want to win this game, then RISK LOOSING!

 

[Jay Jay]

Good call Phyz!

As soon as I read over what I had written the correct course of action was pretty clear.

Having one of the dudes who seems to have his **** together say my thoughts confirms it.

Thats what is good about posting here...

Thanks bro!

JJ

 

[Play the Game]

How about raising the stakes? Make out with the chick next to you.
It's just a game. Sometimes you have to bluff, to make the other person fold.

It's not like you're going to have a meaningful relationship with a girl who plays these types of games anyway.

Go ahead try this "above the rules" approach, but i have a feeling you're just going to crash and burn. What you're doing is equivalent of asking the guy across from you at a poker table, you don't have the Ace do you?

He knows he's got you. Same here.

 

[Obsidian]

it sounds like you tried to approach but her stupid games (ie, leaving when you got closer) f*cked it all up. She'll probably grow out of her stupidity eventually, but it will be too late for you to bother with her. Let her shoot herself in the foot, minimizing her interactions with quality guys with this foolish behavior. Girls that try to play this jealousy sh1t are like AFCs who think that being nice will increase attraction: Both instances involve one sex applying strategies that would only work AGAINST THEMSELVES. Social proof, negs, etc attract WOMEN; when women try to use them against men, it just pisses men off.

Good decision to next.