can't strike the balance (active disinterest)

[cloneofstenyhoyer]

I am just so confused right now about how much interest I should be showing. It's like I can't communicate to women that I want to be more than friends. At the same time, I feel like I have to be "actively disinterested". It's like I can't balance between the two - acting like I don't care and showing her I want a romantic relationship with her. I have had success with women in the past, but lately, I don't know if I'm trying too hard or what. I can't seem to get the girls I want. If I go on a date, and I don't see any signs on her end that she is ready to be kissed, wouldn't it be creepy just to plant a kiss on her lips? I had a failed kiss attempt on my last date. Should I walk away from this girl? Would she even care if I said NEXT? The last girls I walked away from didn't care that I nexted them. They didn't care that I didn't call them. They didn't care that I was confident - which is actually normal behavior for most people it seems. I don't know if this girl is looking at me from the get-go as a friend. What if I'm in the friend category before I even have a chance to show her otherwise. I just want to have a normal time with a girl - but it's almost like no matter how many good qualities I have, it goes unnoticed or something. I am sick of games - and even more sick when they don't work. Should I ever be mean to a girl that is disinterested? I may be going insane. :woo:

 

[cloneofstenyhoyer]

if anyone is familiar with anti-dump's machine, did the girl not receiving my kiss mean that she is DEFINITELY disinterested????

 

[slaog]

I am just so confused right now about how much interest I should be showing. It's like I can't communicate to women that I want to be more than friends. At the same time, I feel like I have to be "actively disinterested". It's like I can't balance between the two - acting like I don't care and showing her I want a romantic relationship with her. I have had success with women in the past, but lately, I don't know if I'm trying too hard or what. I can't seem to get the girls I want. If I go on a date, and I don't see any signs on her end that she is ready to be kissed, wouldn't it be creepy just to plant a kiss on her lips? I had a failed kiss attempt on my last date. Should I walk away from this girl? Would she even care if I said NEXT? The last girls I walked away from didn't care that I nexted them. They didn't care that I didn't call them. They didn't care that I was confident - which is actually normal behavior for most people it seems. I don't know if this girl is looking at me from the get-go as a friend. What if I'm in the friend category before I even have a chance to show her otherwise. I just want to have a normal time with a girl - but it's almost like no matter how many good qualities I have, it goes unnoticed or something. I am sick of games - and even more sick when they don't work. Should I ever be mean to a girl that is disinterested? I may be going insane. :woo:

Lol you think way too much!

Forget about tactics and forget about what the girl is thinking. Develop a Dj mindset and you won't be thinking too much or caring what others think.

You can't say she is definetly disinterested but I'd say that you're after putting her on a pedestal and she probably is disinterested.. so what!? Next her if she doesn't show you interest.

 

[cloneofstenyhoyer]

but my balance problem remains. I don't show interest and come off as asexual. I do show interest (try to kiss her) and all of a sudden she is on a pedestal. I REALLY like Anti-Dump's machine but it seems to put to much emphasis on the female. Let HER show her interest first. But it seems like I keep waiting for signals of interest and am not getting them.