"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Cant get over this girl...

gimmeyofonenumba

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Long story short. I approached her the minute i saw her. Met near my work. Saw her once a week or so. Eventually asked for #, she declined "im not that easy". Some time went by. She runs into me again and acts interested in me. We talk, we were planning to hangout, later she spills the beans saying she has to move with her Mom. She's gone, never speak again. I think she kept trying to keep me at bay by not wanting to start a relationship before moving.

-at the time it wasnt that big of a deal, I was thinking I would just find another one. It has been 4 months now since i last seen her, but her face is like embedded in my memory. I have tried going out with other chicks, but I really wasnt STRONGLY attracted to them, so it just felt kinda boring and artificial. It just aint the same, I keep thinking of this same chick and how happy she made me.Man I could start pouring all the afc crap im thinking right now. Sometimes I think to myself that she may come back to visit...maybe I should move?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Pimp-sicle

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Well normally I'd give you some tough love here, but I'm going to try a different approach in my response.

-Ask yourself why this girl is still stuck in your head when:

a) you never went out on a date with her
b) she never lead you to believe she was interested in you
c) you idealized her and put her on a pedestal before you even knew her.


That might give you some perspective on why your thinking the way you are right now. I'm not telling you she wasn't interested/attracted to you, but she definitely wasn't interested/attracted to you enough to get to know you better. Most likely it seems like she was thinking towards the future and her impending move as the reason to not start anything new with you or anyone for that matter.

You said you've been on a few dates with other women but they just didn't interest you, well keep going out and meeting new girls until you find a girl who does interest you. Honestly one-itis (which you kinda do have) is not a fun place to be. Its sooo hard to get out of that mind frame when your stuck on a girl but when you get out, you look back and feel foolish for wasting valuable time thinking about something you had absolutely no control over. Move on with your life, have fun, work towards your goals. If you ever run into her again then maybe something might happen, but don't count on that or live in the past. Its the biggest mistake guys make when they're coming up in the game.




PIMP
 

Caveman

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Pimp-sicle said:
Move on with your life, have fun, work towards your goals. If you ever run into her again then maybe something might happen, but don't count on that or live in the past. Its the biggest mistake guys make when they're coming up in the game.
He's absolutely right but I do realize that it's very hard to get out of that mindset. I have been in it several times and if I could tell you the easy way out, I would. The truth is: there is no easy way.

All you can do is try and focus on other things, other goals, other girls untill you find something or someone that keep you interested enough to forget about her. Find another passion. Try and tell yourself she is not the most important thing in your life every day and that she does not deserve your attention. This is not about her: it's about you!

You must get on with your life and she is not gonna help you with that, so go on out there and live!

Once you get out of your one-itus state of mind be very careful to keep away from it.. Easier to be prevented than to be cured.
 

shiningshadow

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Those two responses were a great view on oneitits. Thanks.
 

DJsparky

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You'll encounter these girls all the time, man. You've got to know that your the prize not her, if she doesnt want to get to know you more then thats her problem, plenty more fish in the sea and who knows you might hook a shark, just dont let her bite you.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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