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John9999

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Went out on Thursday with a woman my age, I’m 53, on Sunday. We have done some light texting since Sunday. Not once yet has she started any conversation but she is responsive when I reach out. she said that she rarely dates and what a big deal it was that she came out and met me. I think she’s just shy and inexperienced.

Was in middle of text convo today with her, asked when she’s free this, no response?? Not even “I’ll have to look at my schedule” not loving that.

at what point do you guys think a woman should be initiating convo?
 

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John9999

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I agree. We confirmed for a Friday date since I put up my message. I will do no texting and will only confirm the date on Friday
 
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DEEZEDBRAH

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Went out on Thursday with a woman my age, I’m 53, on Sunday. We have done some light texting since Sunday. Not once yet has she started any conversation but she is responsive when I reach out. she said that she rarely dates and what a big deal it was that she came out and met me. I think she’s just shy and inexperienced.

Was in middle of text convo today with her, asked when she’s free this, no response?? Not even “I’ll have to look at my schedule” not loving that.

at what point do you guys think a woman should be initiating convo?
Dating cratered SMV begs for stupidity.

53? Date epiphany phase. Not dinosaurs.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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I agree. We confirmed for a Friday date since I put up my message. I will do no texting and will only confirm the date on Friday
But go get more baaaaes. Particularly 30yrs younger.
 

MrWood

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women 40+ can be picky, and thats ok... lots of resistance and player type spidey senses.

realize after 40 they really dont want to ride the carousel... they prefer a horse to ride long time and do everything to not get on plastic horses that just go up and down.

beware, 99% want to FALL in love. The WANT that feeling one more time and they want it to last.
 

BeExcellent

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Advice from the old lady:

Agree to a large degree with @MrWood on this. Since being married (although historically I’ve always been a LTR gal) I’m just not into silly BS. I’d rather have something meaningful with someone I actually care for and am attracted to.

If that means down time between relationships, that’s fine. I’m good being alone. I’m solid. I’ve got a life & responsibilities and so does any person who has their act together.

I’m happy to let things develop slowly. Or to redevelop or to emerge in an organic way. This takes time.

Keep in mind that some women, particularly if of a traditional mind set, may respond but not initiate. Texting and social media have created this expectation that responses ought to be instantaneous and that traditional gender roles (male leads...female responds) are passé. Except really they aren’t passe at all. They remain relevant.

I choose from men who approach me...who show interest in me. I don’t worry about men who don’t...but my life has stuff going on and I might not respond in 2 seconds. A man needs to be even keeled enough to understand this.

Be patient. See if she responds. Keep leading. If she doesn’t respond wait a few days before reaching out again. Or if it’s warranted wait a week or so. You can’t know what someone else has going on. If a week from now you text & still nothing? Move on. Failure to respond is still a signal.

Or date the 30 year olds. They’re more responsive if they like you. You have to decide what YOU want from your interactions with women & go from there. I know men in their late 40s & 50s who prefer to date someone close in age who has similar frame of reference and life experience...but if you prefer much younger and can attract them? Do that if it suits you.

Figure out what you are looking for & then act accordingly. Whatever that means.

But some women (myself included) are not going to actively pursue men. I simply wasn’t raised that way & it feels entirely unnatural to me.
 

andreihaha

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Stop thinking about it, this is your problem. You're hinging on her responding as a part of your hapiness, and when she doesn't you get butthurt. This type of mentality won't get you anything.

Have some fun ffs.
Great post!
Once you stop thinking about it, you will feel no more pressure. She will feel it instead and she WILL start to be the one initiating.
 
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DEEZEDBRAH

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The metric by which I always esculate and approach with is, I lead, she follows or next set. There's no ambiguity nor any exception to the rule. Its desire on steroids or next set.

Hotter girl's turn 18 everyday.
 
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