Cancelled a date because she will be on her periods.

[Switch13]

Hey guys,

I know this girl for past year and a half and we see each other every couple of months. I have made it very clear with her that we can only be friends with benefits, no relationship.

So, she calls me up last week and ended up having phone sex and she asked me if I can see her next week. I said, yea I am free and we can link up. So we make a plan couple of days ago, decide a date. And we even talk about if she be ok with having sex in a car (LOL)!

Today she messages me again, asking to make sure that I am not gonna flop out on her. I assure her not to worry, and ask her if she will be on her period on our scheduled day and she replies, I might be. So, I told her if she is, then we will have to reschedule. She snapped and started giving me emotional drama that if she is on her periods, we can just chyll and i shouldn't cancel. Also, she said she is disappointed with the fact that I only want to see her for sex. I told her to stop her emotional drama and reminded her that I have very clearly stated my intentions and terms. Her last message to me was " If i could see your face, I would have slapped you."

My justification to myself: I needed a break after exams thats why I planned a day with her. And if we are just friends with benefits and sex is not on the table then I am better off spending time and resources elsewhere.

Her last message just made me want a second opinion of my behavior. Is it valid or have i just lost it? LOL

 

[yougottaknow90]

LOL. You did an excellent thing.

It'll pay off. Next time you're alone with her she'll run the drama and when you don't give in but keep physically escalating with the sex she'll phuck your brains out.

 

[ghostridur]

yup. just ask again to make sure

 

[Igetit!]

Hey guys,

I know this girl for past year and a half and we see each other every couple of months. I have made it very clear with her that we can only be friends with benefits, no relationship.

So, she calls me up last week and ended up having phone sex and she asked me if I can see her next week. I said, yea I am free and we can link up. So we make a plan couple of days ago, decide a date. And we even talk about if she be ok with having sex in a car (LOL)!

Today she messages me again, asking to make sure that I am not gonna flop out on her. I assure her not to worry, and ask her if she will be on her period on our scheduled day and she replies, I might be. So, I told her if she is, then we will have to reschedule. She snapped and started giving me emotional drama that if she is on her periods, we can just chyll and i shouldn't cancel. Also, she said she is disappointed with the fact that I only want to see her for sex. I told her to stop her emotional drama and reminded her that I have very clearly stated my intentions and terms. Her last message to me was " If i could see your face, I would have slapped you."

My justification to myself: I needed a break after exams thats why I planned a day with her. And if we are just friends with benefits and sex is not on the table then I am better off spending time and resources elsewhere.

Her last message just made me want a second opinion of my behavior. Is it valid or have i just lost it? LOL

To be 100% straight up honest with you,I agree with HER.

I think SHE WAS RIGHT and what you did was INSULTING to her.



You're gonna cancel a date just cause a chick was on her period? I don't think you realize what kind of message that sent to her.


You made her feel like a HO,like the ONLY VALUE she has is for you to stick your d1ck in. I don't know if you're new to dating or what,but NO CHICK wants to feel like a slut.

YOU SAID you wanted to be friends with benefits. Uhhh.....hello?

You said FRIENDS............with BENEFITS. Well she's been giving you the benefits,but now that she's on her PERIOD to where SHE CAN'T,you just wanna toss her aside. You're like,"Can't have sex? Ok...well GO AWAY until you're able to have sex. When you're able to have sex again,THEN we'll hang out".

It's like if sex isn't available 24/7,you want NOTHING to do with her. I could see if she were WITHHOLDING sex,but dude.....it's her PERIOD.


You said friends with benefits,so just hang out one day,like FRIENDS do. You can still hug,kiss,play with her boobs and all that.


By cancelling the date,you were in effect telling her all she is is a "hole" for you,NOT A PERSON. And you wonder why she was offended?


Thing is this.....EVEN IF all she is is a "hole" to you,you can't make her FEEL that way. Hang out with the chick dude. It ain't gonna kill you for you and her to get together and intercourse not happen from time to time,ESPECIALLY when it's cause of her period.

 

[Hydrak]

I agree with the above poster. Spot on.

However, you could have just done her in the butt instead. It would get WAY less messy that way.

 

[Sonny Knight]

your not a dj your just a petulant child Switch13 grow the fucck up

you have no class

 

[Mike32ct]

I was thinking the exact same thing as Igetit.

I understand it's FWB. But is the ONLY benefit vaginal intercourse?

You can still make out, grind, get a BJ or HJ, or suck her t$ts.

If you act like the period thing is no big deal and do other foreplay instead, she might even get so horny she changes her mind and wants messy sex anyway.

But even if she doesn't, you still hang out and get other play.

 

[Bokanovsky]

You said FRIENDS............with BENEFITS. Well she's been giving you the benefits,but now that she's on her PERIOD to where SHE CAN'T,you just wanna toss her aside. You're like,"Can't have sex? Ok...well GO AWAY until you're able to have sex. When you're able to have sex again,THEN we'll hang out".

It's like if sex isn't available 24/7,you want NOTHING to do with her. I could see if she were WITHHOLDING sex,but dude.....it's her PERIOD.


You said friends with benefits,so just hang out one day,like FRIENDS do. You can still hug,kiss,play with her boobs and all that.


By cancelling the date,you were in effect telling her all she is is a "hole" for you,NOT A PERSON. And you wonder why she was offended?

No, you don't get it. "Friends with benefits" is not the same thing as "friends who happen to have sex with each other". The latter is known as a relationship. The former is the polite way of saying "fvck buddy".

Think about it. If you found a woman sexually attractive and liked her personality, you wouldn't be just fvcking her...you'd be dating her. If she's your FWB, it means that you don't really like her as a person. The only reason you are seeing her is sex. So why hang out with her when she can't have sex? Would you go to a store if you knew the product you wanted was out of stock? Would you take your car to a mechanic if it didn't need to get fixed?

To the OP: this chick is catching feelings and trying to convert your FWB arrangement into a relationship. If you don't want that, hold your ground and enforce the rules.

 

[cablecow15]

I agree with most posters here , so im gonna step out on alimb and say , next time find out if shes on here period , and if she is , cancel for some other **** , so atleast she doesnt feel like crap , covers you both , and you wont be forced to spend time with her . but myself i see this as prime bj time , and i prefer that when i can , if the girls decent at it

 

[bigneil]

You failed what is a standard test.

And it's "have her period" not "on her periods". Are you running a 7/11?

 

[Greasy Pig]

Standard responses to "I have my period":
That's what showers were invented for.
I used to be a butcher, so no big deal.
It's OK, it washes off.
I'm game if you are.

In saying that, having been in the OP's situation before, the last thing you want to do with a FWB is give her any hope that you have deeper feelings for her. If he wants to keep her at arm's length, he was right to cancel. I wouldn't have done it so directly or honestly, but I'd be worried that non-sexual hangouts could give her a false impression of my intentions towards her.

The thing with my past FWBs was that it started off with just pure fvcking, then all of a sudden I'd arrive and they'd have a rented DVD to watch.
So instead of fvcking straight away, suddenly we're sitting down and watching a movie.
A bit later on, I'd rock up and she'd have cooked dinner. So now, it's not just fvcking anymore, we're sitting down and having a meaningful conversation over dinner before getting down to business.
Then a bit later on she's delaying sex until really late at night and inviting you to stay over. And so, they suck you in to a situation where your interactions progress to a level you never intended. Instead of just pure sex, she makes your time with her more "couple-like". I don't blame the women at all.
They want to feel less like a sperm receptacle and more like a human being, I get that.
I was always a gentleman and handled these ambushes with class, but it was then that I knew I had to pull way back.
The OP is only guilty of lacking class, but the theory behind his behaviour holds water IMHO.

 

[Ronaldo7]

I agree 100% with the OP. You stated what you wanted from her at the beginning. When a girl gives you emotional drama over anything, you should always ignore everything they say. If she is not ok with being a re-usable toy, which she is, i think you should cut your losses. Find another girl that will only be down to be FWB. This girl clearly thought feelings would be involved and you thought otherwise. No one wants to be around a girl on her period. Props to you for standing your ground.

 

[Who Dares Win]

Man you screwed up big here, I agree with Igetit totally plus as Mike told you her period doesnt mean you cant get "anything" from her.

You could have asked for a ******* which in my opinion is even better when you're stressed or tired since it doesnt force you to put any work nor being concerned about her pleasure.

Plus this girl is behaving fair to you, dont you read all the bvllsh1t and games guys face in this forum, this girl ask you very few compared to what she provides, its not only your best interest but your sense of fairness that should make you do better than that.

Op you're cvnt not less than girls taking advantage of nice guys.

 

[Bokanovsky]

The OP is only guilty of lacking class, but the theory behind his behaviour holds water IMHO.

Well put.