"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Canceling on her

B

Bay area pimp

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Hi guys,

Been dating this girls for about five weeks now. I have a date with her tomorrow night. We just set this up today but something came up and I probably wont be able to make it anymore. 2 questions. Will this have a negative impact on the situation. What is the best way to tell her I cant make it. Thanks in advance for the advice.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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P

Phyzzle

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What came up? A hotter chick?

The best way to tell her you can't make it is to have another date for another day ALREADY PLANNED when you call to cancel. "Can't do tomorrow, but I'd really like to see you ____ and we can ____ and then go home for some @!$$#%$#%"

If you call her TODAY and say that, it'll be no big deal.
 
F

flexion_

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Am I missing something here? Just tell her you can't make it and would like to reschedule.
 
P

Phyzzle

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Digression:

Some guys here have suggested intentially making a date and cancelling it!

They point out that when you're interested in a chick, and she blows you off like that, it really jacks up your desire to see her. So the logic goes, doing the same thing to a woman should work. It's making yourself a challenge.

Any opinions on THAT little theory?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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B

Bay area pimp

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I could see how canceling on her might jack up her Interest level. Although it could hurt it too.
 
R

roman

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Phyzzle said:
Some guys here have suggested intentially making a date and cancelling it!

They point out that when you're interested in a chick, and she blows you off like that, it really jacks up your desire to see her. So the logic goes, doing the same thing to a woman should work. It's making yourself a challenge.

Any opinions on THAT little theory?
Click to expand...
You beat me to it. My cousin has been dating this HB9 for the past 6 months. He cancelled on this broad twice before they went out for the first time. I'm not saying that's the reason why they got together, but it didn't seem to hurt him any.
 
P

Phyzzle

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My cousin has been dating this HB9 for the past 6 months. He cancelled on this broad twice before they went out for the first time.
Click to expand...
DAM!! I never imagined doing that on the 1st date! I mean, how do you start seducing her if you don't even see each other?

If you cancel on a 1st date, before you really know her, an HB9 simply has too many other options. She'll forget about you. Young HB9's have way more options than any male PUA/DJ in the world. ...seems like common sense to me.

That's why I wouldn't cancel a date unless I absolutely had to.

I remember some guys on here canceling dates because they went to the gym RIGHT beforehand and worked out so hard, they didn't feel like going out anymore!

You're supposed to have a life of your own, but I gotta shake my head at that. HB 8-9's have way too many guys trying to ask them out. If you can't even keep a date, they'll find someone who can.

(Bay Area Pimp: you're fine. Just tell her what's up and ask her on another date.)
 
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