"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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"Can we slow down a bit?"

ApocalypseCow2

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So I was with this girl last night. This was about our third date. After a night out, we got to her place at 11:30pm and started watching Saturday Night Live on her couch.

I put my arm around her, played with her hair, and pretty soon we were making out. She seemed to be into it. After about twenty minutes, I put my hand under her shirt and started playing with her t!ts. I unhooked her bra an pushed it back and rubbed her nipples. She seemed to *really* like this. Then, I sucked on them for a little bit. Of course, I had my hands doing other things too (touching hair, caressing legs & foot). I didn't touch her crotch.

Anyway, I start kissing her again and she says, "Hey, can we slow down a little?"

So I did, mostly sticking to kissing. We stopped soon after, and she layed down in my lap with my arm around her. She kept kissing my arm and lightly scratching at my leg. When I got ready to leave, she was constantly touching me and kissing. She seemed to really have opened up.

So, anyway, what was with the "hey, can we slow down a bit" bit? Is it pretty much standard for a girl to say something like that just so she doesn't appear to be easy? I wonder if she really wanted me to slow down.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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BrotherAP

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On one hand, I know it is usually not too difficult to get a girl who is at this point to sleep with you.

On the other hand, if she does sleep with you, she can easily get you convicted of date rape (because she said "let's slow down").
 

qweretyuiopas

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Originally posted by BrotherAP
On the other hand, if she does sleep with you, she can easily get you convicted of date rape (because she said "let's slow down").
That would be a weak argument in court she would need other evidence, but I know what you mean though
 

backbreaker

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I stopped dealing with girls like that...

First, if you really didn't want it to go there, I wouldn't be over your house at 11:30 at night laying on your couch with you... and if was, you would have made it extremely clear about how you feel about sex.

"Damn Babe, I don't want to sound like I am forcing you to do something you don't want to do, but we are both grown ,and this is what I want to do... if we are going to have these type of problems than maybe we should not talk to each other".
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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ApocalypseCow2

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Originally posted by backbreaker
I stopped dealing with girls like that...
Well, I think what I got was the standard response. Girls feel like they have to put up a *little* resistance or else they'll feel like a slut.

I didn't feel like I missed anything, because I didn't have any intentions of going "all the way" anyway. I just wanted a good makeout session and to kiss her t!ts. Based on her actions afterwards, it seems like they'll be time to go further later, if I play it cool.
 

backbreaker

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you mean to sit here and tell me, you are over her house at 11:30 at night, playing with her brests, kissing her on the neck, and you weren't thinking about sex?

Stop lying to yourself and stop lying to us.

You wanted it, she said no.

So right now she is determining who gets what... and yes, women do control the cat, I understand that, but 3 dates? Damn woman, what more do you want? You invited me into your house...

It's about what YOU want, not what she decides to GIVE you.. YOu want to **** her... that's cool, if she doesn't want the same, LEAVE HER ALONE... it's
 

backbreaker

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THE point is, you shouldn't have to "play your cards right" to get some... that's a LJBF right there's thinking... Because that's exactly where you are headed if you keep this up.

I mean, i have been with women that don't put out quickly, and EVERY LAST ONE made it known WAY before I ever stepped foot into their house, or they came to mine, what was up... that's not something you just spring on a guy when his **** is hard at your house on a saturday night.
 

Sp1kez

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Originally posted by JC Jerkson
It's a great line.

However, it should be "we should slow down". Don't ask just tell.

It's from Mystery's DVD's. I watched all 5 last night. Fvcking incredible. They arrived yesterday.

EDIT: Oh by the way... To answer your questions she was giving you "last minute resistance". It's quite common.


JC Jerkson
How much did they cost? I been lookign in p2p but no luck =(
 

TxCowboy

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Originally posted by ApocalypseCow2
So I was with this girl last night. This was about our third date. After a night out, we got to her place at 11:30pm and started watching Saturday Night Live on her couch.

I put my arm around her, played with her hair, and pretty soon we were making out. She seemed to be into it. After about twenty minutes, I put my hand under her shirt and started playing with her t!ts. I unhooked her bra an pushed it back and rubbed her nipples. She seemed to *really* like this. Then, I sucked on them for a little bit. Of course, I had my hands doing other things too (touching hair, caressing legs & foot). I didn't touch her crotch.

Anyway, I start kissing her again and she says, "Hey, can we slow down a little?"

So I did, mostly sticking to kissing. We stopped soon after, and she layed down in my lap with my arm around her. She kept kissing my arm and lightly scratching at my leg. When I got ready to leave, she was constantly touching me and kissing. She seemed to really have opened up.

So, anyway, what was with the "hey, can we slow down a bit" bit? Is it pretty much standard for a girl to say something like that just so she doesn't appear to be easy? I wonder if she really wanted me to slow down.
Typical girl crap bub. Dont let it get to ya ...

Remember, 2 steps forward and one step backward :

Go a ways with her and then let her RECIPROCATE back at ya ... she's gotta WANT u and not JUST you wanting her ...
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Pimp-sicle

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Don't worry about it bro, this girl wants to fuvk you and she WILL let you very soon. Its just that usually in the beginning, they want to resist you a bit so they don't feel like a slvt. She doesn't want to give it up too early because she doesn't know if your in it for the long haul or if your just after a quick piece of @ss. Once you show her that you like her for more than her body, she'll give it up to you.

The whole key is to act like you don't need it though. Next time your in that situation, play it cool, kiss her but don't advance beyond that, see if she's takes control and lets you progress.


Your fine, just chill.



PIMP
 

backbreaker

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That's the farthest thing from the truth...


Look.. if she didn't want to be treated like a peice of meat, she wouldn't let you suck on her neck and play wi th her titties like she was...

this has nothing whatsoever to do with her trying to take it slow, but it has to do with her controling the terms of a relationship.

Hence, why, unless she makes it very clear before you are put in that situation how she feels about that type of stuff, and you 100% agree with her, MOVE THE FREAK ON...

Let me put it this way...

Lets look in the future....

Say, next saturday, you go over her house...

so you have in mind "okay, I am goingto take it slow because that's what she wants"

So you do whatever it is you do, say, put your arm around her and maybe give her a kiss on the neck..

Well, little be known, now she wants to **** (that is assuming that she didn't REALLY want to last night) but is fustrated that you didn't make a move...

LJBF..


Happened to me VERBATIUM about 5 year ago... I had started dating this girl, and we went at it every other day... So one day she tells me she wants me to like her for more than her body, so she said she didn't want to have sex for a month..

20 days later, she borke up with me, saying I that the "spark" was gone... even though she killed it..

Not saying that equals this senerio, but that entire setup just screams caution from what I have seen in my life time, albeit short.
 

TxCowboy

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Originally posted by backbreaker
That's the farthest thing from the truth...


Look.. if she didn't want to be treated like a peice of meat, she wouldn't let you suck on her neck and play wi th her titties like she was...

this has nothing whatsoever to do with her trying to take it slow, but it has to do with her controling the terms of a relationship.

Hence, why, unless she makes it very clear before you are put in that situation how she feels about that type of stuff, and you 100% agree with her, MOVE THE FREAK ON...

Let me put it this way...

Lets look in the future....

Say, next saturday, you go over her house...

so you have in mind "okay, I am goingto take it slow because that's what she wants"

So you do whatever it is you do, say, put your arm around her and maybe give her a kiss on the neck..

Well, little be known, now she wants to **** (that is assuming that she didn't REALLY want to last night) but is fustrated that you didn't make a move...

LJBF..


Happened to me VERBATIUM about 5 year ago... I had started dating this girl, and we went at it every other day... So one day she tells me she wants me to like her for more than her body, so she said she didn't want to have sex for a month..

20 days later, she borke up with me, saying I that the "spark" was gone... even though she killed it..

Not saying that equals this senerio, but that entire setup just screams caution from what I have seen in my life time, albeit short.
You need to be the one with the balls in this and the one who IS leading , BUT ...

This doesnt necessarily mean that she just wants to be friends (just yet) ... too early to call that one...

You do need to give her a chance to reciprocate and make moves of her own in addition to you making the moves - its gotta go both ways

I'd turn this cr@p right back around if I was you and next time yall are together and she's trying to make out , you should pull back and say "I dont feel like [kissing, touching, etc...] right now .. maybe in a lil bit" and then go in for the kill when YOU are ready ...

-L8rs
 

backbreaker

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Originally posted by TxCowboy
You need to be the one with the balls in this and the one who IS leading , BUT ...

This doesnt necessarily mean that she just wants to be friends (just yet) ... too early to call that one...

You do need to give her a chance to reciprocate and make moves of her own in addition to you making the moves - its gotta go both ways

I'd turn this cr@p right back around if I was you and next time yall are together and she's trying to make out , you should pull back and say "I dont feel like [kissing, touching, etc...] right now .. maybe in a lil bit" and then go in for the kill when YOU are ready ...

-L8rs
did you actually just say that "you need to give her a chance to reciprocate and make moves of her own"


... I'll take my c hances on hell freezing over...

It won't happen.. it's not supposed to happen.

See, the whole "I don't feel like kissing, touching" bit doesn't work on someone with OPTIONS...

Most cute/good looking women have alot of options... tell them you aren't in to them like that, or don't feel like kissing/touching, it's a chance they might leave you for someone who will.


The BOTTOM line, is you WANT to **** her.. you can't **** her right now because she doesn't want to.

Not only that, this is NEW... she invited you over her house late at night, lets you rub on her breats, lets you make out with her, but she then feels like a slut when you want to **** her?

Get Real.

Oh.. make no mistake, she has feelings for you, that's not in question... YOu have even done everything right up until now... What's in question is what baggage does this chick carry.. no girl in their right mind puts a man in that type of situation and expets him to be cool with it..

LIke I said already, if I kNOW how you feel about it, then I can't expect to get laid, but you didn't, she waited until she gave you blue balls.

Every chick isn't worth salvaging... I doubt this one is either.
 

backbreaker

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I almost forgot...

The bigger issue than that is the essence of being a DJ...


now, it's not that you probably couldn't have sex with her... because you probably might be able to in the future...


But since when do DJ"s stick around for MIGHT's?


If you are on your game, you are working out, things are going for yourself.. YOU ARE NOT GOING TO HAVE A SHORTAGE OF WOMEN WILLING TO FIT YOUR CURRENT DEMANDS, A ND ONE OF YOUR CURRENT DEMANDS IS NOOKY

You might not have them NOW but they will come in due time.

By waiting around, saying to yourself "If I play by her rules she will let me hit" because th at's in a nutshell what you are saying to yourself, you are putting the value on HER instead of YOU.

She should be throwing her clothes off to satisfy you, not you pondering when she might be ready.

Not saying anything is wrong with her or you, ,but it is as simple as saying that this chick doesn't meet your critera... which is more than looks... You like sex, either she doesn't or she is playing games.. either or, it's not for you.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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seanchai

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You did the right thing buddy. Saying "Can we slow down a bit?" is not a good reason to next a girl. She clearly wants you, and you just need to agree with what she says verbally and press on non-verbally. Say "I totally agree", go back to kissing, then move forward again. You'll get sex sooner this way than by dropping her and moving on to someone else, someone who probably will use this classic LMR line as well.
 

RaWBLooD

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Originally posted by Pimp-sicle
Don't worry about it bro, this girl wants to fuvk you and she WILL let you very soon. Its just that usually in the beginning, they want to resist you a bit so they don't feel like a slvt. She doesn't want to give it up too early because she doesn't know if your in it for the long haul or if your just after a quick piece of @ss. Once you show her that you like her for more than her body, she'll give it up to you.

The whole key is to act like you don't need it though. Next time your in that situation, play it cool, kiss her but don't advance beyond that, see if she's takes control and lets you progress.


Your fine, just chill.



PIMP
this is a much better post than those telling him to drop her cause its some sort of "test"

glad theres some that arent KBJ :up:
 

RaWBLooD

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Originally posted by seanchai
You did the right thing buddy. Saying "Can we slow down a bit?" is not a good reason to next a girl. She clearly wants you, and you just need to agree with what she says verbally and press on non-verbally. Say "I totally agree", go back to kissing, then move forward again. You'll get sex sooner this way than by dropping her and moving on to someone else, someone who probably will use this classic LMR line as well.
basically , if he doesnt get sex by next weekend i wholeheartedly agree he should drop her.
 

backbreaker

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lol, I can agree with that, that's a pretty good cutoff line, assuming she isn't on her period or some crap like that
 

italostud

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Token resistance. Don't speak. Just go back to kissing her for a bit. Wait for a few minutes, maybe change positions, then try again. Repeat 3 or 4 times until copulation occurs.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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