"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Can someone please translate BP results in english?

Cash

Senior Don Juan
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Some Blood Pressure results reading 177/63 mm.

Am i gonna die?

Appreciated.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Throttle

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get it checked by someone who knows what they're doing & can tell you what it means. those numbers don't really add up, unless either (a) you did it too soon after serious exertion or (b) you have a serious pulse pressure issue: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pulse_pressure which could have several different causes and all are best addressed by medical professionals. (this is the sort of thing they're good at)
 

donjuanjovi

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The first number is your systolic pressure. The pressure exerted on your blood vessels by your heart during its contraction (when it pumps).

The second number is your diastolic pressure. The pressure exerted on your blood vessels when your heart is at rest (not pumping).

177 is BRUTALLY high. Normal resting numbers for a healthy adult would be around 110-120 over 70-80.

Many factors affect your blood pressure. Who took your pressure, and when? I would see a doctor ASAP.
 

Cash

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A doctor funnily enough, five weeks ago. I feel pretty good though.

I'll look into it. Thanks.
 
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