"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Can one recover from "Auto Rejection"?

Insouciant

Don Juan
Joined
May 10, 2012
Messages
41
Reaction score
3
Every seasoned DJ knows that attraction has an expiration date.

Everyone seasoned DJ should also be savvy enough to know that they should just approach the girl, and avoid auto-rejection in the first place.

In any case, what if you were put in a place where... because you didn't approach the girl and express your interest (IE by asking her out for a cup of coffee), she went into auto rejection and has gone cold and distant.

Before, she'd give me 3-4 second stares, smile, even wave. Now, she won't even make eye contact.

This is most likely a sunk ship, which is fine. But has anyone ever turned around a chick who went into auto-rejection before? If so, how did that happen/
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

PRAGMATIST

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 4, 2014
Messages
16
Reaction score
2
Insouciant said:
Every seasoned DJ knows that attraction has an expiration date.

Everyone seasoned DJ should also be savvy enough to know that they should just approach the girl, and avoid auto-rejection in the first place.

In any case, what if you were put in a place where... because you didn't approach the girl and express your interest (IE by asking her out for a cup of coffee), she went into auto rejection and has gone cold and distant.

Before, she'd give me 3-4 second stares, smile, even wave. Now, she won't even make eye contact.

This is most likely a sunk ship, which is fine. But has anyone ever turned around a chick who went into auto-rejection before? If so, how did that happen/
I dont get a feel for the exact circumstances.. was this a woman you saw somewhere regally? Or just some chick you saw from a distance in a club one time???

Because the two scenarios are kinda different. In a club, you can sometimes get away with making excuses for not seeing her do something or whatever or even that your shy, so you didn't approach, its possible to turn your disinterest to an advantage, obviously..The push pull thing.

...If however this was an ongoing situation where the chick had been giving you IOI's over weeks or months...and you never approached, and now she has gone cold...well clearly she will think you were not interested, but worse that you didnt step up and reciprocate in all that time, which would have been manners..Women take this as a diss and insult..obviously. She basically feels like a fool now because you dissed her, when she was basically hitting on you...

If its the long term scenario then you can tell her, you noticed her and really wanted to talk to her but that the whole time you couldn't because you had a Gfriend... This is your most plausible excuse for ignoring her..Dont say your shy, that's just a playful line for a club...women dont want guys who are too shy to approach them...so even if thats why you backed off, dont let on.
 

VladPatton

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 26, 2012
Messages
3,246
Reaction score
232
Location
NYC
Girls get REALLY pissed off when you don't make a move I've noticed. They turn their attraction into hate for you really fast. Just make it a law in your mind to bust a move when things are alive and hot. If you don't care or find her attractive, fine, who cares, but if you do, it is in your best interest to say hello and ask for a date.

The answer is that you will seldom turn things around. It looks off: Oh, now you decide to go for it when she's pissed at you??? It's expired, too late, it's past it's prime. Just own your decision and next time...you know better.
 

Big Pappy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 30, 2003
Messages
699
Reaction score
1
One must strike while the iron is hot.
But - you already know that.

To turn this girl around, you'll need some help, I'd say. Social proof ( and I'm not talking about facebook crap) can win her back over to you. You just need to show her how fun and exciting you are. To just display this on your own is going to seem a bit lame and desperate. But to be hanging out with your friends and let her see you. Then, invite her into your world. If she passes, c'est le vie. That's life in the big city. Next!
 

taiyuu_otoko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
5,776
Reaction score
4,881
Location
象外
VladPatton said:
Girls get REALLY pissed off when you don't make a move I've noticed. They turn their attraction into hate for you really fast.
Yep. Give it up. Find somebody else. You're wasting your time.

She's already put you in a box in her mind. The way she sees it, she gave you the BIGGEST come on ever, IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY, and you blew her off (in front of everybody) like she was a piece of gum on your shoe.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Top