"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Can Interest Resurface?

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blue17

Senior Don Juan
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I've just realized a trend on this board. Girl is interested in the guy, she gives clear buying signals whether physical related or obvious remarks in order to get the guy to do something. The guy doesn't act on these signals for whatever reason. Maybe he was nervous/scared or was just plain oblivious to the buying signs.

Perhaps a while later, the guy gets his act together and finally asks her out. To his surprise, she rejects him. I mean what the f*ck...she was obviously interested wasn't she? Maybe she thought that he wasn't into her and that she was rejecting him, so she mentally blocked any feelings that she had for him. I mean why would she continue hanging on to a guy who she thinks wasn't interested in her, right?

What's funny as that even if the guy was totally oblivious and didn't pick up on the signals NOR ask her out, she would still be friendly. She would think he wasn't interested, but still think he is a good guy like she always thought. But if he doesn't escalate her advances, and instead waits and THEN asks her out she is offended and acts cold toward him. She felt rejected when her initial signals weren't acted upon, so she tries to mentally tune out her feelings for him...and as soon as the guy asks her out she is turned off and offended.

Any advice on a situation like this? What can come out of it, friendship...something more.....nothing at all? At the very least she finds you attractive, and enjoyed being around you otherwise she wouldn't have given those obvious hints in the first place. Can these feelings resurface? If so, how? Do you admit that you weren't thinking straight etc. or do u sweep it under the rug and start fresh?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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S

spidersense

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I think you're absolutely right about the feeling rejected thing, and it makes negative feelings towards him. If you are persistant though, without being pushy, you should be abel to woon her affection back.
 
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Bonhomme

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She has to make the change

She has to change her concept of you. I've had some near turn-arounds of this sort, but nothing that quite stuck. But enough to get a sense that it's possible if you truly have changed and change the way you relate to her and to others in her presence.

Data is getting overwritten in people's brain cells all the time.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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