You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
IF you don't look like a stereotypcial Asian nerd/geek, it can definitely be an advantage. Most women think of Asian men as sensual, and definitely mysterious. If you can be in good shape and well-groomed, women will be intrigued by you as an Asian guy.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
Yeah a girl on my floor commented on how mysterious I am. She saw me come in late, 3AM. She asked where I was and I told her it was none of her business. I was at the library, haha.
I went out to this club in the big city and went to this club and to my surprise theres absolutely full of asians in it!!! I've never seen soo many asians since I lived in the Philippines lol. I noticed that most of them were "thug" wanabes and acting all ghetto as if they were all black. So yea theres no mystery and uniqueness to that. everyone is so predictable there. Fun times tho.
i remember making my classmates laugh with funny sounding filipino phrases. they imitate me and everyone would just end up laughing. this was when i was in primary school/freshman HS in aus., so i guess it worked. for me at least. oh yeah, that was 6 years ago. i wish i stayed there longer
Jesus christ you guys, stop being so hung up on your race. What the hell is wrong with you? If you stop trying to identify yourself with your race then other people wont either.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
I agree that fitting the stereotype of a geeky asian and a gangsta asian is not going to get you anywhere. Thuggish asian girls will stick with the thuggish asian guys. I think its an advantage if you fit somewhere right in between. Meaning having the intelligence, work ethic of a nerd and the attitude and confidence of a thug( not saying you have to be hard, just saying that you wont let others step all over you)
And another thing, Black guys dont whine about getting dates because they can get white girls or latina girls and also asian girls. But how often do u see an asian guy with a white, black, or latina. My last relationship was with a latina and all my friends were envious, but this rarely happens. heres an example: There are two asian girls that live right below my apartment. One of them happens to go with a black guy. This guy constantly beats on her, so she got rid of him. Now she goes with a Hispanic guy. Another pair of asian girls live right next to us and guess what they both go out with black guys. Im not saying anything is wrong with going with a black guy. Im just saying its easier for them to get a date outside their race. The media can be blame for that. Look at the movies and music. Girls of all races drool over the white justin timberlake, orlando blooms and the black Usher, Nelly, and Tyrese. But for asians there is not a big enough star in the media. Who? Jet Li? Jackie Chan? Bruce Lee? These are the most well known asian stars and none of them are sex symbols. I think the only asian to potentially be a international sex symbol is Takeshi Kaneshiro. Hes the guy in the movie "House of Flying Daggers" I think its in theaters right now. Hes also the cover model for the Play station 2 game Onimusha. If he can branch off into the American media then it will break barriers for many asians.
Umm I don't know too much about this subject but I think it is a lot more accepted by society for an asian to date outside there race than it is for a black person.
as a filipino guy, i cant sympathize with the problems some of the asians on the board are having. im banging white girls left and right fellas! use your race to your advantage! i live in a white town, and i love the fact that i 'stand out'. As for attitude..quit acting like a clown and giving sterotypical jokes concerning your race. why would she find you attractive after hearing that? are you 'trying to be her friend'? nothing wrong with being funny mind you, but i would stay away from those kind of jokes. show her what shes missing out on by not being with an asian!
Bang on there mate. My insecurity made me paranoid about being different coz people where looking at me. Now I realise I just stand out cos I'm unique and rare. I hate being generic and "one of the usual".
Chicks I know that have dated asian guys always comment on how small the asian penis is.
I suppose, you could tell them how their future husbands would think they are still virgins.
(please don't be too offended. I just had to bust on you a little bit.)
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
One thing that annoys me is that even though I dont dress and act gangsta, people kinda see me as one and expect me to be some kind of crim or player. Its stupid because I get categorised and never given a chance. People get very wary for no reason.
Some HBs even admit to me that they initally avoided me cos they thought I was bad news and would play them or do something bad. Most of my chickfriends who I'm in good terms with said that they were cautious and wouldnt get involved with me cos word got around that I was a player (lol I was King Kong AFC then) It seems like I have this bad ass/player vibe that I would love to shake off cos it's all just an delusional assumption of me. One girl I hooked up with even said "Why me, Your a player and coulda had any girl in the club"
I've even been drug searched by detectives and nearly got kicked out of college for some stupid drug suspicion and alleged drug dealings all because someone had a "hunch" about me. I've even been asked seriously if I had guns to sell. I've even had cases where some dude would say, "Hell no I wouldn't f*ck with him, He'd kill me!!". Yea right lol...Hell if I was a real gangsta my cover would get blown everytime.
I dont have tattoos. I 'm not big. I dont have hussies (yet) hanging around me. I'm not up myself or ****y. I'm studying to be a f*cking teacher lol. Back then I had low confidence, low self esteem and didn't even had balls to stand up to some people disrespecting me. I hardly even swore and macked a lot of girls. Maybe I was too shy back then that people start reading way too much about me and judged me wrong.
I kinda want to shake off this so called "gangsta/player/tough c*nt" image of mine and be just a cool fun guy or something. My time gets wasted by people who thought I was this kind of person and have a false expectation of me.
my friend attends a community college and he got a bad (or good depending how u look at it) rep just for getting into 1 fight there. he and his friend was chillin outside the campus smoking and cause of his friend that got into a fight, he had to go help him. they did win of course and he walked into class bruised up. Now guys are afraid to fvck with him; and girls are afraid to talk to him? anyway his rep changed after that. but the ppl there do see him as more mysterious since they dont know much about him.
and often i get labeled as player from the ppl i meet. They think im lying when i say i dont have a gf. one time my bro's friend straight up asked me a few times if i was a player since i didnt give him a real answer.
i just take joy in my profound abilities in martial arts and mathematics and try not to worry about it.
it can be an advantage with OTHER ASIANS or among your particular nationality.
it also works FABULOUSLY WELL if you're a CHICK.
but asian guys don't generally find themselves in the highest demand among the majority female population.
deal with it.
it may be that we are considered just this side of gay - we're neat, clean, polite, the aforementioned proficiency in martial arts and mathematics and perceived as somewhat submissive. oh, and not to mention the whole size thing....
true or not, that's the rap. deal with it.
be like water. when you strike water, it gives and flows. but when water strikes, it can shatter a mountain.
so sayeth confucious. or was it bruce lee? maybe homer simpson....
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