"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Can anyone figure out why this thread was locked?

Shoud this thread have been closed?

  • Yes, it wasn't a useful thread.

    Votes: 2 13.3%
  • No, it was a good thread.

    Votes: 11 73.3%
  • Yes, because it was posted in both DJ Discussion and DJ Tips at the same time (which is a no-no).

    Votes: 2 13.3%

  • Total voters
    15
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Wyldfire

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Vincent...I can see locking crap threads, but dude...that is a really GOOD thread. I reported a post by jpjrjrjr that attacked someone else on the thread. Why can't you just delete the darn post that was alerted on?

I know you don't get paid, but that's no excuse not to handle the position properly. I alerted one post of a flamebaiter who consistently behaves horribly on this site. Twice now he's managed to get GOOD threads of mine closed by coming onto them and starting problems. Perhaps someone should bring the issue to Allen's attention in the moderator forum and have it dealt with.

It doesn't take that much effort to be a good moderator who is fair, Vincent. I've been the admin and moderator of a site bigger and busier than this one that was far more difficult to run. I only had one other person helping me. It's not that hard.

On top of that...it only takes a couple of seconds to post on the thread why you close it. You guys don't like it when I fight back when these idiots start their crap, but it doesn't look like it makes any difference if I do engage in flame wars because you guys are just going to lock any thread I start out of pure laziness the second some ass decides to break the rules and disrupt it. How does allowing that make this place "better"? All that does is give all the power to the people who really couldn't give two sh*ts about this place in the first place. I've been here for a long time and put up with the crap because I actually care about the place.

Good threads warrant at least a little bit of effort from the moderators. The thread I posted was good. I put it in GD first because more people would see it there and I bumped it once in awhile because it got buried by a bunch of crap threads. I put it in Tips later because someone said it was Bible material. Cross posting of worthless threads warrants the deletion of one. Crossposting a good thread to tips should be allowed if the discussion also qualifies as a tip. The tip section shouldn't really be filled with discussion anyway.

I just don't think it's asking too much for the moderators to enforce the rules and not just lock threads because some people can't behave themselves...especially good threads.

I hope you won't take any of this personally...it's just not right to moderate as some are doing, including you in this case.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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diablo

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Originally posted by Wyldfire
Around the same time that my thread was locked, one of the linked threads below was moved to this forum. The same person posted the exact same thread in Mature Man.
I moved the one from DJD to AE; Vincent locked your thread. The two are completely unrelated. If I had known that Immaculate already had a thread regarding his problem in Mature Man then I'd have deleted his other one - as is, I'm unable to keep up with every single thread by every single person at every single minute... because of this, there's a "report this post" option for any member to use when they see something such as a cross-post, flame, or other thread or post which needs attention brought to it. While this button should be used sparingly, it does have a purpose.
 

Wyldfire

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Originally posted by diablo
I moved the one from DJD to AE; Vincent locked your thread. The two are completely unrelated. If I had known that Immaculate already had a thread regarding his problem in Mature Man then I'd have deleted his other one - as is, I'm unable to keep up with every single thread by every single person at every single minute... because of this, there's a "report this post" option for any member to use when they see something such as a cross-post, flame, or other thread or post which needs attention brought to it. While this button should be used sparingly, it does have a purpose.
diablo...I used the alert this post feature to report one of jpjrjrjr's flamebaiting posts on my thread. Vincent just said the main reason he locked it was because of the flamebaiting. How fair is that? The same thing happened to that thread I started about the dangers of anti-feminism. Both were damn good threads that were not the usual "Oh my God, do I call her?", "Does she like me?" threads. Both locked because of flamebaiters. I mean come on...can you guys at least understand why people get so frustrated with that kind of moderating?
 

Vincent

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Originally posted by Wyldfire
I hope you won't take any of this personally...it's just not right to moderate as some are doing, including you in this case.
Trust me, nothing on this forum I ever take personally.

Most of the things you complain about are listed in the rules when you sign up when you register. You might want to re-read those

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/register.php?s=&action=signup

It doesn't take that much effort to be a good moderator who is fair, Vincent. I've been the admin and moderator of a site bigger and busier than this one that was far more difficult to run. I only had one other person helping me. It's not that hard.
Me even responding to this is taking more action then I would for most people. I respect you as a poster but I don't have the time to devote to going through a thread with blatant trolling and flame baiting.

How does allowing that make this place "better"? All that does is give all the power to the people who really couldn't give two sh*ts about this place in the first place.
Everyones idea of better is different. Maybe mines wrong but I've put in a lot of effort to improve these forums and I notice a difference.
 

Wyldfire

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Originally posted by Vincent
Trust me, nothing on this forum I ever take personally.

Most of the things you complain about are listed in the rules when you sign up when you register. You might want to re-read those

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/register.php?s=&action=signup

Me even responding to this is taking more action then I would for most people. I respect you as a poster but I don't have the time to devote to going through a thread with blatant trolling and flame baiting.

Everyones idea of better is different. Maybe mines wrong but I've put in a lot of effort to improve these forums and I notice a difference.
Vincent...that's a cop out and you know it. How on earth can this site be "better" when the trolls, flamebaiters and disruptors have the power to prevent a discussion simply by disrupting and breaking the rules? If you don't have the time or willingness to actually review the thread and make a FAIR decision on it then you should post in the moderators forum asking that another moderator do it who has time. I respect you as a person as well, Vincent...at the same time I have to say that I'm VERY disappointed that you are taking the position you are on this. It's inherently wrong.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Vincent

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I look at a thread where the entire 2nd page is trolling/flamebating/worthless posts and I don't see a great thread, I see one that's about to turn into a thread with nothing but crap posts. That's not a discussion, it's a disaster waiting to happen.

I'm sorry your thread turned out like that but I can't be blamed for the actions of other members.
 

Wyldfire

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Originally posted by Vincent
I look at a thread where the entire 2nd page is trolling/flamebating/worthless posts and I don't see a great thread, I see one that's about to turn into a thread with nothing but crap posts. That's not a discussion, it's a disaster waiting to happen.

I'm sorry your thread turned out like that but I can't be blamed for the actions of other members.
No, you can't be blamed for the actions of others, but you CAN be blamed for not moderating in a fair way. It is NOT fair to give all the rights to the trolls, flamebaiters and disruptors at the expense of the rights of the members who try to contribute something worthwhile to this site.
 

Vincent

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Originally posted by Wyldfire
No, you can't be blamed for the actions of others, but you CAN be blamed for not moderating in a fair way.
You're not making any sense. I closed the thread so people couldn't flame. I can't ban people and people are entitled to their opinions. They should just STFU about it, but they can't. Not everyone who was disagreeing with you was a troll so there isn't much other action I can take. If it's a good post, it'll get the respect it deserves in DJT.
 

Wyldfire

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Originally posted by Vincent
You're not making any sense. I closed the thread so people couldn't flame. I can't ban people and people are entitled to their opinions. They should just STFU about it, but they can't. Not everyone who was disagreeing with you was a troll so there isn't much other action I can take. If it's a good post, it'll get the respect it deserves in DJT.
You CAN delete flamebait posts and post a warning that such posts break the rules without locking threads. Diablo does that all the time. Damn it Vincent you just said a few posts back that you lock threads just because it's "easier". Easier is NOT always right. THAT is the point I'm attempting to make here.
 

Vincent

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I told you your option. If you have to have that thread re-opened I will delete every current post.

I actually have things to do, not just please everyone on this forum.

I can't devote 20 minutes to a single post when there's other posts that need attention. This is Sosuave.com, not wyldfire.com.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Wyldfire

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Originally posted by Vincent
I told you your option. If you have to have that thread re-opened I will delete every current post.

I actually have things to do, not just please everyone on this forum.

I can't devote 20 minutes to a single post when there's other posts that need attention. This is Sosuave.com, not wyldfire.com.
Do what you want...

I have only one thing left to say about this...if you aren't willing to take a couple of extra minutes to moderate responsibly and in a fair way, perhaps you shouldn't moderate at all.
 

Vincent

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Originally posted by Wyldfire
I have only one thing left to say about this...if you aren't willing to take a couple of extra minutes to moderate responsibly and in a fair way, perhaps you shouldn't moderate at all.
Forgive me for having a life outside of this forum.
 

Don Ronny

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LOL!

We should have a war of ethnic cleansing on this forum.

KILL THE TROLLS! Ban their whole IP or anything that even looks like their IP! You guys are lucky I am not a mod.
 

Eternal

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Wyldfire, why is it that the past few times you have sprung up, sh*t has stirred up on this site? Coincidence?

Every few months, it is the same process:

- Wyldfire posts a thread she thinks is "great"

- Moderator closes post

- Wyldfire's period hits in and all hell breaks loose

- Moderator tries explaining self and gets a "well, I was incharge of a site much larger and it wasn't hard" reply

- Moderator wakes up after little nap from reading previous reply

- People question what moderators do

- Moderators care even less about said people, because they don't know what really goes on

- Moderator goes out and haves a life, only to find 3 "where the hell are the moderators!?" posts

Nice process, isn't it?

If you can't figure out why a thread was locked, PM the/a moderator of that forum...Don't start a new post. You wonder why you think it's easy to moderate a site? Because people played by YOUR rules. When you are an admin, you can do whatever. When you are a normal poster, you live by the admins rules. The moderators go by the admins rules.

Stop making posts asking why a thread was closed, and life would be easier. God forbid, you post a "get free dating stuff here!" and you wonder why THAT thread gets deleted...
 

SELF-MASTERY

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I think wyld should be made a moderator.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Lost In Translation

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Quote : Vincent
Plus if you think our modding is bad imagine how bad it would be if GGTW was a mod :eek:

:crackup:

Vincent that was gold !


Lost In Translation :D

**AUSTRALIAN STREET PIMP**
 

Jay-X

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Originally posted by Vincent
Forgive me for having a life outside of this forum.

we're not saying mods are lazy or spend too few of a time in the forum, we're saying the exact opposite, that you close threads when it's not needed
 

Wyldfire

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Originally posted by SELF-MASTERY
I think wyld should be made a moderator.
I'd actually be a very good moderator...and fair. However, I doubt Allen would make me one just because of the controversy that is associated with me. Unfortunately, that is a result of a few people who have a problem with any women being here. The fact that I'm outspoken makes them despise me. Oh well...sucks to be them. :D
 

Wyldfire

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Eternal...I am NOT the reason "sh*t" gets stirred up when I show up. The problem is with the disruptors and flamebaiters who get a hard on everytime they see me post. I proved that on the thread I started about the dangers of anti-feminism. I didn't argue with anyone at all and just alerted the numerous personal attacks against me. Guess what...the ones who DO start the problems didn't have their posts deleted at all, but my thread was locked.

If the moderators aren't going to deal with the trouble makers appropriately and they attack me what would you suggest that I do? And don't say "ignore them" because I did that too and they just keep right on without recourse at all.

And the thread I posted about was probably one of the best threads that has been posted here in months. Hell, it wasn't even REMOTELY controversial, either.

As far as moderating the site I ran being "easy"...yeah, right. It was a war zone for radical feminists and radical masculinists. There hasn't been anything I've ever seen here even close to how volatile that site was every minute of every day. One side would get mad because I let both sides have equal say and they would flood the forum with illegal images, illegal content and some of the most vile threats you could imagine. Those things were against the rules (I didn't have a lot of rules, either) and it never stopped them from being broken. There were times there were several thousand posts in about 15 minutes. Moderating this place is so Mickey Mouse it's not even funny. The problem is that there are too many absent moderators who aren't here enough to actually moderate. That leaves a small handful of moderators who actually do the work and I only see a couple of them (diablo and Paradox) do the job as it should be done. They add a comment when they lock something and they respond to the actual issues in the thread instead of just locking it because they're too lazy to take a minute or two longer to do the job they volunteered to do. I mean...if you volunteered to keep an eye on your baby neice or nephew and they were choking would you just turn around and walk away because you aren't getting paid? Of course not.

Being a moderator isn't all about having the title under your name so people will look at you as someone with power and influence. It's a job...and anyone who isn't willing to do the job should step down so Allen can replace them with someone who is willing to actually moderate.
 
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"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

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