Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Can any "nice" guys relate to this?

DJHoolahoop

Senior Don Juan
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There's a difference between being nice, and sacrificing YOUR OWN happiness in order to make others happy. Yet many of us, at least I do, will go out of our way to be nice to those around us in order to get what a lot of us never do, have a person who genuinely cares. What ends up happening is you get used and counted on to be there for when THEY need you but when it comes to something YOU want, THEY'RE conveniently not there or when YOU want to hang out and do something they're too busy for you.

What is going ON here? Why do these people you help and be nice to, treat you like you don't exist? That if you dropped off the face of the planet, chances are that they'd only wonder where you are when THEY needed something. The problem with this is that they look at you as someone they go to for help and advice as opposed to someone they will hang out with on a regular basis. So what's the way out from this? Start living YOUR life for you and not for others, you can be nice but not at the expense of yourself.

How selfish are you REALLY being by wanting to live YOUR life? By wanting to create YOUR happiness by buying those things YOU want and doing what YOU want instead of what OTHERS want you to? Seriously, how selfish are you REALLY BEING by living YOUR life? You're on this planet like the rest of us are and in NO way should you be so grateful of that privilage that you sacrifice everything you are for the sake of everyone else. I wonder how people can sit there and say you are being selfish for living your life the way you want to instead of how THEY THINK you SHOULD be living it.

Stop living your life for everyone else, trying to appeal to them and appeal to yourself and your life. If you give people the opportunity to take advantage of you, they WILL take advantage of you.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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DJnoob

Master Don Juan
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I would only do this for my family. To put it this way, If i were in hell, Hell would be like heaven to me knowing my family and loved ones are in a happy place
 
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