looking for answers
Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 22, 2002
- Messages
- 74
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baring all of that in mind
what would you do in my situation ?
what would you do in my situation ?
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Calling All TRUE Don Juans
- Thread starter looking for answers
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Player_Supreme
Banned
You have already postulated the correct solution. Get back on your game program.
Do what you've been training yourself to do.
Do what you've been training yourself to do.
white_hype
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 27, 2003
- Messages
- 522
- Reaction score
- 1
you were right, you shouldnt have written this
NewMan
Master Don Juan
I think all of this is missign the point.
"Looking" blew it by opening up way to quickly to this girl.
If he had taken it slowly (His feelings for her) and not vocalized it to her - she would still be showing high interest in him.
It's the fact that he caved to her "Womanhood" that he's in a position that he is in.
You put down your shield - and that - as many guys know here is a very big DJ mistake.
Player - DJ whatever.
A soon as guys get emotionally involved with a woman it fvcking over.
Unless you have full control over your emotions - you will get burnt by this girl.
cutting back on the contact - going about your buisness and ignoring her for the most part is the only way.
I know - it's not very easy - I'm going through something similar.
My gut feeling is, is that your fvcked on this one. That you will not have another chance.
Hope I'm wrong for your sake.
"Looking" blew it by opening up way to quickly to this girl.
If he had taken it slowly (His feelings for her) and not vocalized it to her - she would still be showing high interest in him.
It's the fact that he caved to her "Womanhood" that he's in a position that he is in.
You put down your shield - and that - as many guys know here is a very big DJ mistake.
Player - DJ whatever.
A soon as guys get emotionally involved with a woman it fvcking over.
Unless you have full control over your emotions - you will get burnt by this girl.
cutting back on the contact - going about your buisness and ignoring her for the most part is the only way.
I know - it's not very easy - I'm going through something similar.
My gut feeling is, is that your fvcked on this one. That you will not have another chance.
Hope I'm wrong for your sake.
iqqi
Master Don Juan
in the words of A1 steaksauce,
danger, will robinson!
this sounds very much like the same situation i was in months ago. met this guy (i am female), we connected like no other connection i've ever had. i'm talking pretty magic concepts like soulmate and forever and true love. he made me feel like everything i had been keeping faith in was not in vain, and here he was, my reward. it was deep.
besides the connection and attraction and extreme chemistry, he told me he had been hurt before. he was shy, and insecure, and very naive. i mean he put it all out on the table. things a man should NOT admit. what did i do? i decided i could not play around with this one, i would do whatever it took to let him know i cared and he could trust me. he still didn't. but i had faith that he was honest and i knew how much he liked me because of our connection.
i didn't want to hold it against him that he was honest or hurt in the past. i didn't want to judge him. because (and i didn't admit this to him) i thought he was the one.
as we got closer, he would act crazy. if i didn't call, he would flip out. panick, and then calm down and give me the silent treatment for days! it was like he didn't care! he would say things to me when we would talk, like if we keep going someone is going to get really hurt. all of a sudden he wasn't ready for a commitment because we would just end up breaking up and he wouldn't be able to handle it.
and i just reassured and reassured, and told him to take his time, he would learn that he could trust me. understand me, i had no doubt in my mind that he had been hurt, and that he was seriously into me. and that may be the truth. but i am not sure now, because what happened in the end? a complete fcuking shock to the heart, ha ah ahaa! and just for you, the whole thing was documented here at sosuave!
the men here told me to watch out for this emotionally unstable and charming victim. but i told them "no no! he has been hurt! how can i judge him for that?"
click here
then they were right about some things. but still, i believed in my man. after all, he had been hurt.
click here and see
if you just want to know how my bubble was completely and utterly burst, just click here.
and guess what? it is the one thing that still fcuks with me to this day. just look at my most recent thread. be careful.
danger, will robinson!
this sounds very much like the same situation i was in months ago. met this guy (i am female), we connected like no other connection i've ever had. i'm talking pretty magic concepts like soulmate and forever and true love. he made me feel like everything i had been keeping faith in was not in vain, and here he was, my reward. it was deep.
besides the connection and attraction and extreme chemistry, he told me he had been hurt before. he was shy, and insecure, and very naive. i mean he put it all out on the table. things a man should NOT admit. what did i do? i decided i could not play around with this one, i would do whatever it took to let him know i cared and he could trust me. he still didn't. but i had faith that he was honest and i knew how much he liked me because of our connection.
i didn't want to hold it against him that he was honest or hurt in the past. i didn't want to judge him. because (and i didn't admit this to him) i thought he was the one.
as we got closer, he would act crazy. if i didn't call, he would flip out. panick, and then calm down and give me the silent treatment for days! it was like he didn't care! he would say things to me when we would talk, like if we keep going someone is going to get really hurt. all of a sudden he wasn't ready for a commitment because we would just end up breaking up and he wouldn't be able to handle it.
and i just reassured and reassured, and told him to take his time, he would learn that he could trust me. understand me, i had no doubt in my mind that he had been hurt, and that he was seriously into me. and that may be the truth. but i am not sure now, because what happened in the end? a complete fcuking shock to the heart, ha ah ahaa! and just for you, the whole thing was documented here at sosuave!
the men here told me to watch out for this emotionally unstable and charming victim. but i told them "no no! he has been hurt! how can i judge him for that?"
click here
then they were right about some things. but still, i believed in my man. after all, he had been hurt.
click here and see
if you just want to know how my bubble was completely and utterly burst, just click here.
and guess what? it is the one thing that still fcuks with me to this day. just look at my most recent thread. be careful.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Player_Supreme
Banned
I wouldn't say he was fawked on this one. Let's take a lesson from the pimp game.
A pimps sells women a dream. Everybody has dreams of wants and desires.
Find out what hers are and sell them to her...nothing says you actually gotta deliver.
She wants a "boyfriend". Ok, how can you sell her this dream with you in control of it...pretend to symp out and bow down.
Get into her head. Tell her sweet words of love and devotion...everything that she needs to hear.
You should of already gotten her life story by now. I hope when you talked (even though it sounds like you did), that you didn't talk about yourself. You should of been finding out about HER dreams and needs and desires.
Smart women know how to get any huckleberry chump talking about him and in the end he ends up spilling the beans. Men love to talk about themselves. But so do women. You just have to outlast them in the game of will power.
Good girls have dreams too.
Sell her on her's and you will control her mind. Control her mind and you will have control over her body!
A pimps sells women a dream. Everybody has dreams of wants and desires.
Find out what hers are and sell them to her...nothing says you actually gotta deliver.
She wants a "boyfriend". Ok, how can you sell her this dream with you in control of it...pretend to symp out and bow down.
Get into her head. Tell her sweet words of love and devotion...everything that she needs to hear.
You should of already gotten her life story by now. I hope when you talked (even though it sounds like you did), that you didn't talk about yourself. You should of been finding out about HER dreams and needs and desires.
Smart women know how to get any huckleberry chump talking about him and in the end he ends up spilling the beans. Men love to talk about themselves. But so do women. You just have to outlast them in the game of will power.
Good girls have dreams too.
Sell her on her's and you will control her mind. Control her mind and you will have control over her body!
Trapspringer
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- May 3, 2003
- Messages
- 242
- Reaction score
- 0
iqqi, I can't read through all of those posts! Provide cliff notes.
yah bro classic AFC one-itis here, nothing more, nothing less.
you ****ed up, best way to salvage is to break contact and let her chase you for a bit... talk 2-5 mins on the phone, sound sincere, then withdraw a bit.... do this a few times, you might get another chance.... but if you **** up when your around her again then you are DONNNNNNEEEEE
you ****ed up, best way to salvage is to break contact and let her chase you for a bit... talk 2-5 mins on the phone, sound sincere, then withdraw a bit.... do this a few times, you might get another chance.... but if you **** up when your around her again then you are DONNNNNNEEEEE