Calling all DJ Masters: The Ex Challenge

[ryanbo29]

Hey all experienced brethern, I have a huge amount of help to ask of you: help me get my ex back.

Before you roll your eyes, let me say that Ive thought this thru.

I went out with a girl for 9 months.. I initially cheated on my girlfriend with her, then left her for this woman.. But she was never able to get past it all the way.

Eventually, she dumped me.. This was 6 months ago. Well about 3 weeks she IMed me to see how I was doing, took a couple jabs then did it again 2 weeks ago. I ended both conversations on my terms, and she hasn't contacted me since.

What would my next move be. Do I call her and just act super happy with my life (as I did on my IMs). I figure at some point I'm going to have to contact her, since she's contacted me twice in 2 weeks before.

I know all of the funny answers.. like 'your next move is to move on'. And to some extent I have, but I'd like to see if there's anyway I can DJ her back.

Thanks!

Ryan

 

[CLOONEY]

Sometimes when you do what you did to a chick, they loose their pride and dignity, this is why they shut themselves off from u!! U ended the convos on YOUR terms, how exactly was that? U probably crushed her ego, and now you are gonna pay for it, she wants revenge, seriously, its only human nature. You need to play this cool, IM her next time u see her online to see whats up..........then talk to her ocassionaly, make sure she is also the one calling/IMing u. Tell her even to give you a call sometimes. Let things roll, and slowly work your way back in.

 

[ryanbo29]

I ended the conversation by telling her that I had to run.. I told her both times on the logoff that it was nice talking to her.

But I do have to say that the 2nd conversation she still seemed angry.. She brought up the girl I was with originally before I started seeing her. When that came up and turned South, I ended things.

 

[SDBmania]

I hope this wasn't already been said

She might be concerned. Because you cheated on your GF at the time with this girl, she might think that there is a possibility you'll cheat again.

 

[ryanbo29]

Yep, agreed.

Now I just need to figure out how to proceed.

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

No "Master DJ" is going to tell you to get back with your ex. One of the DJ rules is never take back an ex after a break up. You cheated and she dumped you (giving you what you deserve) and now she will never love, respect, or trust you like she once did. Your chances of this working out are about as good as Saddam coming back into power.

 

[NatureGuy]

I disagree with a previous post. It could work, but you have to proceed very carefully.
There's some good advice from others, but I would add that you probably need
to reconcile with her (apologize somehow for what you did) and reassure her.
If everything has to be on "your terms" it won't work.

 

[CLOONEY]

Originally posted by NatureGuy
I disagree with a previous post. It could work, but you have to proceed very carefully.
There's some good advice from others, but I would add that you probably need
to reconcile with her (apologize somehow for what you did) and reassure her.
If everything has to be on "your terms" it won't work.

Yes, good advice. Dust 2 Dust, "Master DJ's" with NO IDEA, will tell you to NEVER get back with an x. It all depends on the circumstances, and ALL the time of COURSE getting back with an x will pose a problem. But it is DEFINATELY attainable. There is an article on the from page of sosuave that explains how breakups can sometimes be good for the relationship in the long run. Here is the link...........

http://www.sosuave.com/quick/tip307.htm

 

[ryanbo29]

Yeah I did apologize before. It was a long drawn out ordeal. But anger and emotions were high, and I'm hoping that 6-7 months has helped ease tensions. That, and the fact she contacted me twice through IM.

I think I will give her a call next week perhaps.

Ryan

 

[DJnomore]

I have a similiar experience

I brought up an example of something I had done and then said I would never do again and then never did it again. I communicated that I had no intention of ever doing it again.

After that you can't really do much.

Just be a good person and be more understanding with her than usual cause she has a lot to deal with thinking about it.