Call her while she's out of town?

[Tony197]

I'll preface this by saying I've had lots of great first dates that never led to a second date. I've concluded it was a mix of bad timing, and me being too overeager, too soon.


So with that said.. Had a great first date. Lots of fun and chemistry... and some making out (PG-rated). She said she would be gone all next week visiting family out of state, but tried to secure another date before leaving. I smiled, but let her know I was busy.

Texted her when I got home to make sure she was safe. She texted back that she was and that she had a lot of fun.

I said "same", told her to enjoy her week with family, and that I would be in touch. Nothing else since. She made a joke about being "into" by old-school formality.

Simple enough, so far. Now here's where I need help...

We went out last Thursday, and she is spending all this week (Sunday to Sunday) out of town back home with family. Do I wait until she gets back to call/text to set something up? Do I wait a week (so call this Thursday)? Or do I set something up now?

I don't want to look overeager/thirsty, but also don't want to be the jerk who waits forever to call. Your thoughts?

 

[Glassguy]

Its fine if you send her a quick text a couple days after the first date.

No harm no foul if she has medium to high interest. Too many guys feel as if they have to play the game and wait forever to text a woman after a date. While I agree that immediate texting is bad, its ok to ask her to send you a text to let you know she made it home safely, especially if alcohol was involved on the date or it was late when you headed home.

IMO women that are relationship material and arent so much into playing games (and have high interest) will respond in a positive way to a text a day or two after the first date. If they respond by playing games, then next them or just go silent until they hit the ball back over the net to you.

Too many guys wait forever to reach out after a good first date and the iron isnt hot anymore.

Just send her a "Hey how is the family trip going?" and see how she responds.

 

[bigneil]

Oh, for the love of God you texted after your date to make sure she got home ok? THIS IS NOT 1955. I've told you guys for FIVE YEARS - the modern girl will TEXT YOU FIRST after a date - OR SHE IS NOT INTERESTED.

Love never dies of starvation, but often of indigestion.

NEVER contact them when they are on a trip - EVER. There is a very good chance she is with someone else, like an ex, or just met someone else and is down for anything while she's away. Women don't take trips, trips take them.

This is the time to let her be free and let her miss you. Let all the sappier men send nice messages checking in on her. I wouldn't even respond unless she double texts you. When she gets back, wait until SHE reaches out to YOU. She will need time to rest.

You "Don't want to be the jerk who waits forever to call"???? PLEASE.

 

[bigneil]

PS - It's not a "great date" unless you get another date.

 

[Billtx49]

I would send only one text midweek on Thurs. while she's gone and not make a call - 'Hey, was thinking about you today. Hope you are having a great visit'.
I would leave it at that, and see if she replies or initiates anything else.
It allows her space to visit her family and you touched base while she was gone.

 

[Glassguy]

Oh, for the love of God you texted after your date to make sure she got home ok? THIS IS NOT 1955. I've told you guys for FIVE YEARS - the modern girl will TEXT YOU FIRST after a date - OR SHE IS NOT INTERESTED.

Love never dies of starvation, but often of indigestion.

NEVER contact them when they are on a trip - EVER. There is a very good chance she is with someone else, like an ex, or just met someone else and is down for anything while she's away. Women don't take trips, trips take them.

This is the time to let her be free and let her miss you. Let all the sappier men send nice messages checking in on her. I wouldn't even respond unless she double texts you. When she gets back, wait until SHE reaches out to YOU. She will need time to rest.

You "Don't want to be the jerk who waits forever to call"???? PLEASE.

I disagree. The "send me a quick text to let me know you made it home ok" works great for me. Its not 1955, but it throws them an option for communication. If the girl is relationship or #1 plate material, trust me, it does more good than harm. And more times than not, she will use that text to set up the next date.

After she lets me know she made it ok, I say "great" and then I go silent. Nothing wrong with chivalry.

 

[SgtSplacker]

Could just let her reach out first.

 

[bigneil]

I disagree. The "send me a quick text to let me know you made it home ok" works great for me. Its not 1955, but it throws them an option for communication. If the girl is relationship or #1 plate material, trust me, it does more good than harm. And more times than not, she will use that text to set up the next date.

After she lets me know she made it ok, I say "great" and then I go silent. Nothing wrong with chivalry.

Well, for 5 years I have yet to have one girl who liked me NOT text first after a date.

I've dated about 20 women during that time (average rating 85 on Photofeeler). Trust me, I WISH it were as easy as the man can be in control. It's not.

Women with high interest are already open for communication.

SHE will set up the next date?? No, she will text you first and say something like "I had a really good time" and you will say "let's get together again".

The problem is that you guys have been doing it wrong all along and it's just too painful to bear.

 

[resilient]

To quote a 17th century French nobleman:

“Absence diminishes minor passions and inflames great ones, as the wind douses a candle and fans a fire.”
~ La Rochefoucauld (1613–1680)

"The more you are seen and heard from, the more your value degrades. You become a habit. No matter how hard you try to be different, subtly, without your knowing why, people respect you less and less. At the right moment you must learn to withdraw yourself before they unconsciously push you away. It is a game of hide-and-seek."
Law 16: Use Absence To Increase Respect & Honor​

 

[bigneil]

By waiting until SHE reaches out, every time, the relationship maintains a state where she has high interest.

When you turn into a little she-male and text things like "Hey baby it was great to see you tonight!" she grimaces.

 

[Glassguy]

Still disagree Neil. It's all in the attitude and delivery my man. I get laid by 7s-9s more than concrete block and it works just fine for me.

 

[bigneil]

Still disagree Neil. It's all in the attitude and delivery my man. I get laid by 7s-9s more than concrete block and it works just fine for me.

Please PM me photos and I'll pay $2.50 per photo to have them rated on Photofeeler before declaring them 9's.

I agree that you get them to reply faster if you hump their leg, but humping their leg (even with attitude and delivery) is a BAD idea. In a good relationship, SHE does 80% of the texting. See Coach Corey Wayne for more.

 

[sazc]

I would wait until at least next Monday before I sent her a text. The way I see it is, she's on vacation with her family. My assumption is that she has activities planned and is going to be otherwise occupied. Let her have her space to do the family thing and then pick back up on the Monday or Tuesday after she returns. Text her and ask her how her vacation was and suggest she tell you all about it on Day X at Y place at Z time.

 

[Tenacity]

I'll preface this by saying I've had lots of great first dates that never led to a second date. I've concluded it was a mix of bad timing, and me being too overeager, too soon.


So with that said.. Had a great first date. Lots of fun and chemistry... and some making out (PG-rated). She said she would be gone all next week visiting family out of state, but tried to secure another date before leaving. I smiled, but let her know I was busy.

Texted her when I got home to make sure she was safe. She texted back that she was and that she had a lot of fun.

I said "same", told her to enjoy her week with family, and that I would be in touch. Nothing else since. She made a joke about being "into" by old-school formality.

Simple enough, so far. Now here's where I need help...

We went out last Thursday, and she is spending all this week (Sunday to Sunday) out of town back home with family. Do I wait until she gets back to call/text to set something up? Do I wait a week (so call this Thursday)? Or do I set something up now?

I don't want to look overeager/thirsty, but also don't want to be the jerk who waits forever to call. Your thoughts?

Stop over thinking this shyt. Fix your looks, finances, and personality, then play the numbers game.

 

[Glassguy]

Please PM me photos and I'll pay $2.50 per photo to have them rated on Photofeeler before declaring them 9's.

I agree that you get them to reply faster if you hump their leg, but humping their leg (even with attitude and delivery) is a BAD idea. In a good relationship, SHE does 80% of the texting. See Coach Corey Wayne for more.

I've seen your gloating posts where you've posted pics of chicks that you claim to be banging. The only problem is, I never see you in the pics with them. All talk.

At 39 years old and well over 100 chicks laid, I know the difference of a 8, 9 and 10 better than anyone. I dont need to pay $2.50 to see another person's opinion.

 

[dude99]

I'll preface this by saying I've had lots of great first dates that never led to a second date. I've concluded it was a mix of bad timing, and me being too overeager, too soon.


So with that said.. Had a great first date. Lots of fun and chemistry... and some making out (PG-rated). She said she would be gone all next week visiting family out of state, but tried to secure another date before leaving. I smiled, but let her know I was busy.

Texted her when I got home to make sure she was safe. She texted back that she was and that she had a lot of fun.

I said "same", told her to enjoy her week with family, and that I would be in touch. Nothing else since. She made a joke about being "into" by old-school formality.

Simple enough, so far. Now here's where I need help...

We went out last Thursday, and she is spending all this week (Sunday to Sunday) out of town back home with family. Do I wait until she gets back to call/text to set something up? Do I wait a week (so call this Thursday)? Or do I set something up now?

I don't want to look overeager/thirsty, but also don't want to be the jerk who waits forever to call. Your thoughts?

What did we do in the days before cell phones when the girl was out of town? We waited until she got back from visiting her family and we contacted them then.

Was this ok? Yes it was. Will it still be ok? Yes it will.

It is perfectly acceptable for you to leave her alone when she is out of town visiting her family and then you hit her up when she is home. After only one date and her telling you she will be out of town, it will appear as though you can't respect boundaries if you are texting/calling during her time away.

Show her you have other things going on in your life. Show her that you are not waiting and pining for a girl you have had one date with, while she is out of town. Show her you have a life, not appear as though you are hoping she will be your life.

When she said she was going out of town you should have said "cool. Let's get drinks when you return."

Now leave her be on her trip. Hit her up when she returns.

 

[bigneil]

I've seen your gloating posts where you've posted pics of chicks that you claim to be banging. The only problem is, I never see you in the pics with them. All talk.

At 39 years old and well over 100 chicks laid, I know the difference of a 8, 9 and 10 better than anyone. I dont need to pay $2.50 to see another person's opinion.

Dear Assguy,

0) Thanks for admitting my girl is so hot that you can't believe I'm really with her. But wait, now you are saying she's not even a 7? Her photos were repeatedly rated 99 and are the highest rated out of 500+, beating other girls rated 100 in looks submitted by members here.
1) Unlike several members here including wonderer and applegoo (whose girls rated 100), you didn't send me any photos to have rated. I will pay the $2.50 for you since that's as much as your last date budget was.
2) I already posted pictures of me with her at Tenacity's request. The group photo of us taken last week was rated 98 on Photofeeler.
3) I'm sorry to hear you are so unattractive you went through 100 women and none of them stayed with you. I've stayed with the most beautiful girl I ever saw in my life for 9 months now.

Talk about all talk!

I will bet $50,000 that I have group photos of she and I, from 6 months ago and this month. Glassguy can accept this or admit he is wrong.

 

[Glassguy]

Dear Assguy,

0) Thanks for admitting my girl is so hot that you can't believe I'm really with her. But wait, now you are saying she's not even a 7? Her photos were repeatedly rated 99 and are the highest rated out of 500+, beating other girls rated 100 in looks submitted by members here.
1) Unlike several members here including wonderer and applegoo (whose girls rated 100), you didn't send me any photos to have rated. I will pay the $2.50 for you since that's as much as your last date budget was.
2) I already posted pictures of me with her at Tenacity's request. The group photo of us taken last week was rated 98 on Photofeeler.
3) I'm sorry to hear you are so unattractive you went through 100 women and none of them stayed with you. I've stayed with the most beautiful girl I ever saw in my life for 9 months now.

Talk about all talk!

I will bet $50,000 that I have group photos of she and I, from 6 months ago and this month. Glassguy can accept this or admit he is wrong.

I own 3 businesses. Trust me, I can afford whatever. If I needed someone to tell me what I can already figure out on my own, I would pay for their services. I do not.

I have 2 groups of chicks. Bangable and not bangable. I dont really care if they get rated 7, 8, 13....I dont care. I've banged 100+ women because I always have abundance and 3-4 chicks that I can bang at the drop of the hat. They act up, I replace them. End of story.

I could care less about how many pics you have. I still havent seen them with you in them.

You're a mouth piece. I could take $20K to a few NYC strip clubs and come out with whomever and have endless pics. Both with me or without me. I dont buy my pvssy like you, I go after it with game and get it.

Period.

And I'd be happy to bet you $100k that I dont give 2 sh!ts if you have pics with you in them or not.

 

[Glassguy]

And very mature on the name calling dude. Very suave.

Spend some of the money you claim to have and buy yourself a new pacifier. What a baby.

 

[bigneil]

And very mature on the name calling dude. Very suave.

Spend some of the money you claim to have and buy yourself a new pacifier. What a baby.

Was that your reply to me? You are indeed made of glass. Shattered.