"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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C&F reply to: Why would you want to take me out for coffee?we barely know each other

the_govner

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I get this question a lot and I know this statement can be really be used to my advantage with a great reply.

Just can seem to think of the perfect one.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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EastWind

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"Exactly that's why."

Great, perfect reply? You want to get to know the girl because she caught your eye. Tell her.
 

DonJuan11

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"You're right, I would never go out with someone I didn't know well enough"
 

JackPrescott

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the_govner said:
I get this question a lot and I know this statement can be really be used to my advantage with a great reply.

Just can seem to think of the perfect one.
This is the sign of an uninterested woman. Next her ass fast.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Bible_Belt

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Why would you want to take me out for coffee?we barely know each other

Part of the problem is that you are phrasing the original question with the "take you out" part. Leave that out. Then her reply is "why do you want to go for coffee?" to which you reply - "because I want some coffee." Everything you do with a girl is something you do for yourself and she can tag along if she wants.
 

DonJuan11

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Bible_Belt said:
Everything you do with a girl is something you do for yourself and she can tag along if she wants.
Nice. That's what this site is all about.
 

Obsidian

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lol @ LovelyLady

and Bible Belt's onto something :up:
 

Stéphane

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I'm going for coffee you can tag along if you want, it's up to you.
 

DJDamage

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JackPrescott said:
This is the sign of an uninterested woman. Next her ass fast.
I agree.

Something in your delivery is off. Maybe you are rushing through the actual seduction part and the girl doesn't feel you out and she questions your method.

"why would you want to have me in a coffee shop if you can barley show me something here?"

Ever thought about just going to a bar or something? and instead just go to a bar and pick up a girl there so you are already in the location and that is already a quote on quote a date but really is not.

You got to ask yourself, what is a date anyway? if you declare it out loud that you want to see her on a date or even suggest 1 on 1 on a girl that barley knows you, she will be on the defensive end especially if you didn't raise her interest in you from the get go. She knows what you are after its no secret. In our culture we think that as soon as we declare a date that it is basically an activity that will open up and loosen up the courtship process. To me a date is everything from the moment you meet her and what you do, say or act that will elevate her interest level. The activity is not as important as what you yourself bring to the table.

If you are getting this question alot, then no great reply is going to save you.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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the_govner

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DJDamage said:
I agree.

Something in your delivery is off. Maybe you are rushing through the actual seduction part and the girl doesn't feel you out and she questions your method.

"why would you want to have me in a coffee shop if you can barley show me something here?"

Ever thought about just going to a bar or something? and instead just go to a bar and pick up a girl there so you are already in the location and that is already a quote on quote a date but really is not.

You got to ask yourself, what is a date anyway? if you declare it out loud that you want to see her on a date or even suggest 1 on 1 on a girl that barley knows you, she will be on the defensive end especially if you didn't raise her interest in you from the get go. She knows what you are after its no secret. In our culture we think that as soon as we declare a date that it is basically an activity that will open up and loosen up the courtship process. To me a date is everything from the moment you meet her and what you do, say or act that will elevate her interest level. The activity is not as important as what you yourself bring to the table.

If you are getting this question alot, then no great reply is going to save you.

Thanks for some of the replies, guys. Especially liked the Starbucks one ****ing hilarious.

And to this comment, I'll have to disagree. I met this girl a few days ago at a club, and she added me on facebook and MSN before I could even give her a call. I called her and we were talking for a while and she asked why it took me so long to go up to her and talk to her. I told her I was selective.

Then after a little chitchat I said you seem like fun, we should have coffee. She said why do you want to have coffee with me? We barely even know each other. I said, first you question my selectivity, then you question coffee, what's it gna be?? She laughed and agreed.

I think when a girl asks this it's more compliment fishing than anything else. If they're not interested, they would be "busy". Or their dog or brother in law "died".
 

Tear Gas

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the whole point of having coffee is to get to know eachother..dumb c unt

but in your situation she might of been playing hard to get, cause obviously she had some interest to add you facebook..
 

Tear Gas

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DjDan said:
i would honestly look at her like she is retarded for asking that question...

'well duh..im trying to get to know you, lets talk over coffee. i would prefer to sit down while talking to you than stand up'
hahaha exactly..she sounds like a real smart one :crackup:
 

Sam Adams

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As long as you haven't talked to her that much I wouldn't be too sure it is a sign of disinterest. If she barely knows you she could just have some warning signs going off like "is he a serial killer or whatever." Don't be too quick to next a girl until your sure she isn't interested as long as she is picking up the phone when you call and responding to your texts she has to have some interest. I like the idea of the guys ahead of saying "that is why I want to get coffee with you, so I can get to know you." If she is saying take me out I would add in "who said I'm taking you out, I barely know you so you can buy your own coffee." Remember you really have nothing to lose and a whole world to gain so don't hold back.
 

Tear Gas

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Sam Adams said:
As long as you haven't talked to her that much I wouldn't be too sure it is a sign of disinterest. If she barely knows you she could just have some warning signs going off like "is he a serial killer or whatever." Don't be too quick to next a girl until your sure she isn't interested as long as she is picking up the phone when you call and responding to your texts she has to have some interest. I like the idea of the guys ahead of saying "that is why I want to get coffee with you, so I can get to know you." If she is saying take me out I would add in "who said I'm taking you out, I barely know you so you can buy your own coffee." Remember you really have nothing to lose and a whole world to gain so don't hold back.
good post..don't get too worked up over this. Girls can get flaky, so gaming multiple chicks is a good way to raise your chances and actually not care about every girl, which actually might make them like you more ;)

i've had a girl say "but i hardly know you.." then replied with "well, do you want to get to know me?" she smiled and said okayyyy.. sometimes its a girls way of showing that she's not slutty or easy and wants you to work a little. Try talking to her more (rapport) and making her feel more comfortable around you.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Aboleo

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"Yeah, thats kinda' the whole point. And I'm not 'taking' you anywhere, you're coming along-- if you want to, that is."

If you wanna be a jackass about it...


"Exactly. And I'm not 'taking' you anywhere, my doctor said "no heavy lifting" so you'll just have to use your own two feet... atleast until we get to my car. Then... I will take you... ;) ;)"

:p
 

the_govner

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Tear Gas said:
hahaha exactly..she sounds like a real smart one :crackup:

hahahhahh yeah she lost her long term chance right there.

HB8.5 though so I don't feel like NEXTing when I see she's attracted.

Wow I used two official sosuave terms in one post.
 

Gangster Of Love

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If you are meeting broads online, and you are having these type of 'making plans' discussions/talks by emails, or posting it back and forth, you will not communicate too effectively.

Any ****y/funny response to that sort of question will be lost in that particular form of communication. Make sure you say it on the phone.

Also, yes, if you are getting that more than once or twice, it is your delivery and/or inviting/asking out before you create enough interest, curiosity, attraction, or any combination.
 

the_govner

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Gangster Of Love said:
If you are meeting broads online, and you are having these type of 'making plans' discussions/talks by emails, or posting it back and forth, you will not communicate too effectively.

Any ****y/funny response to that sort of question will be lost in that particular form of communication. Make sure you say it on the phone.

Also, yes, if you are getting that more than once or twice, it is your delivery and/or inviting/asking out before you create enough interest, curiosity, attraction, or any combination.

not online.

This was the phone, just asked the question in case I get that again in the future since it kind of got me flustered.

I'm going out with this girl this afternoon, let's see how that goes.
 
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