"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Buy my plate a gift?

dutchmaster

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So a plate I'm spinning has her birthday coming up on monday... She told me it was coming and heavily implied she wants a gift lol. I don't want anything serious with her at all, we've been fvcking for about 3 weeks now but I see her just about everyday because my group of friends hang out with hers. My question is is it really worth buying her a gift? My only intention is to keep fvcking her. No way do I want a relationship since I'm gonna be dorming for the first time ever in 6 weeks
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Mantis Toboggan

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The gift of alcohol and sex. And hey, maybe tape a little dollar store stuffed animal to the bottle of booze. That's romantic.
 

Gangster Of Love

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It is not a plate if you are seeing her every day and she is hinting, demanding, expecting a birthday gift. That is called a relationship.

By saying one thing, yet doing everything that screams "RELATIONSHIP", you are being no different than girls who say one thing, yet do another. If I am that girl, I would look at your actions not your words, and continue being in a relationship with you!
 

Mantis Toboggan

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Gangster Of Love said:
It is not a plate if you are seeing her every day and she is hinting, demanding, expecting a birthday gift. That is called a relationship.

By saying one thing, yet doing everything that screams "RELATIONSHIP", you are being no different than girls who say one thing, yet do another. If I am that girl, I would look at your actions not your words, and continue being in a relationship with you!
A 3-week relationship? Ew.
 

Down Low

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Hmm. It's always her "birthday" a couple weeks after she lets herself get picked up by a guy.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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dutchmaster

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Gangster Of Love said:
It is not a plate if you are seeing her every day and she is hinting, demanding, expecting a birthday gift. That is called a relationship.

By saying one thing, yet doing everything that screams "RELATIONSHIP", you are being no different than girls who say one thing, yet do another. If I am that girl, I would look at your actions not your words, and continue being in a relationship with you!
I see where you're coming from, but me and my friends always end up going to her friend's house to smoke weed and of course she's gonna be there. That's why I see her, I don't do much with her though, mostly just chill with them. If we wanna fvck we go on dates lol, and those are not nearly every day.

Sex sounds like a nice gift, I'll tie a bow tie on my c0ck for her
 

Roober

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What is your guys thoughts on this?

My main plate brings me little gifts or random crap every time she comes over, does whatever I want in the sack, and is extremely into me always saying "I miss you", "can't wait to see you", compliments, etc etc. Thinking about it, I haven't done anything in this regard. Like last night, while we were laying there, she looks over and says "thanks for letting me come over tonight". And I smile and say "you got lucky" and proceeded for round 2.

I was thinking of getting her a small thing of flowers for her birthday on Monday... thoughts? She wants to see me next weekend, but I have already planned two dates with my other plate and a new prospect
 

El Payaso

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Entering relationship territory.
 

Billtx49

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She has shown her appreciation to you, and you should also if you value the part she plays in your life. Just don't over do it if she's just a plate right now.
Any gift cost should only be equal to the amount you value her.
 
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hockeyfreak79

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What is your guys thoughts on this?

I was thinking of getting her a small thing of flowers for her birthday on Monday... thoughts?

She wants to see me next weekend, but I have already planned two dates with my other plate and a new prospect
Yup she's laying some ground work with gifts. Deep down she knows all she can really provide is sex/companionship.

The flowers thing is something a bf would do. The more bf actions you take then the odds of her having a "talk" will increase. Exclusivity etc.
Depending on how long you've been spinning her of course.

Sounds like you are going to have to schedule something prior to the weekend? Ahh the joys of spinning plates. Good luck!
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Urbanyst

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What has she done to earn a gift from you?

I'm not against buying gifts for women, plates, female friends or whatever as long as they earned it. That means they are so awesome that I naturally want to give them something to show them how much I like them. That's the only time I give gifts. I don't believe in doing things for people just because its what they want. It needs to be because I want to do it or there has to be an even give and take trade. Otherwise forget it.

Let's remove the mask and get down to the bottom of this. You are afraid if you don't buy her a gift she will stop sleeping with you right? This is the root of why men dishonor, embarrass and humiliate themselves to get women. You destroy your self image and ego in the process. That's why most married man are so boring and weak compared to single men.
 

Roober

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A couple things...
-Didn't even know about her birthday till I asked yesterday, maybe my first mistake... "Oh it's on Monday, I am going to grab some dinner with friend XXX"
-been spinning for about two months
-Not afraid at all of losing sex for not getting her anything. She would be perfectly happy if I didn't do anything at all, or even just a text

I do worry about giving off the BF vibe though as she is pretty hooked already and it may prompt "the talk" sooner rather than later... She gives me serious googly eyes at times like she is just in awe of me...
 
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AlphaNate

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The only gifts I give to plates are "joke" gifts - something that represents an inside joke, typically. I've given a coloring book to more than one girl.

If you really want to gift her, your time should be your most valuable commodity. If not, don't.
 

bigneil

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Reasonable gifts for birthday of girl you had sex with (choose one).

1) Take her to dinner - search Yelp for top ten restaurants in your area and choose $$ (versus $$$ or $$$$).
2) Bottle of memorable wine (a $20 white - I recommend La Crema Pinot Gris, or a $30+ red - I recommend Cabernet Sauvignon from Napa).
3) A real Silver dollar (costs about $25).

Never give expensive gifts until 6 months or so, and even then, never more than a few hundred IMO.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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sazc

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yep, you get her a gift, any kind of a gift, and shes going to read into that.
Text her a happy birthday and tell her you and she should grab dinner and drinks sometime to celebrate. Dont make a specific date about it in the opening text. if you dont want her to read into it, let her be the one who actually sets the date.
You've acknowledged casually and in a non committal way.

Then take her to a reasonable restaurant ($40-$50 dinner) and some drinks. Then go plate.

Be careful with this one. If she's catching feelings it's not cool to lead her on. That's what ends up damaging females for the next dude.
 

sazc

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1) Take her to dinner
2) Bottle of memorable wine (a $20 white - I recommend La Crema Pinot Gris, or a $30+ red - I recommend Cabernet Sauvignon from Napa)
3) A real Silver dollar (costs about $25)
ha ha, I'm probably the only chick on the face of the earth that would appreciate that silver dollar (we are talking Liberty dollar, right?)
 

bigneil

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ha ha, I'm probably the only chick on the face of the earth that would appreciate that silver dollar (we are talking Liberty dollar, right?)
Morgan (1878-1921) or Peace (1921-1934) Dollar.
 

bigneil

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I sometimes ask my favorite strippers whether they have ever been tipped a whole US Dollar, and they will always bet me a kiss they have, then they always lose the bet.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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