Busy girl....so hard to get

[keemojung]

How do i hit on this busy girl?

She have some freetime but, unfortunately, i am busy during her freetime.

I have just known this girl for only a month from cold approach.

We graduated from the same college.

How do i figure out her schedule so that i can match it with mine?

We had talked on the phone for 2-3 times, a few teasing messages, each
phone call time is around 7-8 min.

Right now im thinking abt taking her out on the date.

What should I do? Where should i take her to?

 

[PRMoon]

Don't put so much pressure on yourself to force things. Often times these things will work out progressively at their own pace. Just keep up casual contact and look for openings. The more contact you have (depending on your manner and time spent) the mute your relationship will fall into one of interest where she'll make more of an effort to meet you or the whole thing will just kind of stall out.

Keep active and spin plates in the mean time to keep yourself honest.

 

[ZenoB]

Usually when a girl is "busy", she isn't interested. Unless she is telling you that because she wants to raise her social value to you by appearing "hip" and not a loser.

If you are texting her already, ask her what her plans are for next week and then wait to see how she responds. If she responds "well", then ask her if she'd like to hang out.

 

[CrashOverRide]

Usually when a girl is "busy", she isn't interested. Unless she is telling you that because she wants to raise her social value to you by appearing "hip" and not a loser.

If you are texting her already, ask her what her plans are for next week and then wait to see how she responds. If she responds "well", then ask her if she'd like to hang out.

Exactly. Bottom line, I wouldn't put too much emphasis into this girl. Sometimes they really are busy, but that doesn't mean you need to put your life on hold waiting for her to be free. Chicks can flake at any second. Try to get her out and capitalize on it... if you can't, just relegate her and spin different plates.

I feel if more men in general take this approach, then women will realize they should be more sensitive to the time we give them. Right now too many guys cave to their every whim which naturally lets them feel they have control.

 

[st_99]

Unless she is telling you that because she wants to raise her social value to you by appearing "hip" and not a loser.
.

I actually know a girl that does this. If she's dating somebody, she'll try her best to find things to do to appear busy and up her social value. When she's not dating anyone, she'll do mostly nothing but sit around. Its funny and sad at the same time.

Sometimes I forget that girls can act just as idiotic as some afc guys do when dealing with the opposite sex.

 

[Angelo]

If her schedule does not match with yours then stop putting so much energy into her. You have to be the Man and stick with your own schedule and not change it just so you can hang out with her.

She is the woman, you make her jump through your hoops. If she doesn't then oh well..

 

[JPlaya]

Move on because her top priority isn't to be with someone right now

 

[keemojung]

Don't put so much pressure on yourself to force things. Often times these things will work out progressively at their own pace. Just keep up casual contact and look for openings. The more contact you have (depending on your manner and time spent) the mute your relationship will fall into one of interest where she'll make more of an effort to meet you or the whole thing will just kind of stall out.

Keep active and spin plates in the mean time to keep yourself honest.

I try not to make the phone call to often and have a chitchat with her.

I gonna save those topic for our dating so that i can use my body language

to seduce her so that i won't fall into the friend zone.

What do u think abt this bro?

 

[keemojung]

Usually when a girl is "busy", she isn't interested. Unless she is telling you that because she wants to raise her social value to you by appearing "hip" and not a loser.

If you are texting her already, ask her what her plans are for next week and then wait to see how she responds. If she responds "well", then ask her if she'd like to hang out.

Well, she is really busy since she has just graduated and is applying

to be an air hostess in an airline. Thus, she needs lots of preparation

like TOEIC thing, an air hostess preparation class, her graduation ceremony.

And if I call her and ask her what is your plan for today or tomorrow,

is it gonna sound needy? How often should i ask her like this?

I just make a call to offer a date, no BS.

 

[keemojung]

I won't change my schedule just to date with her.

I mean I will try to modify it a lil bit so that it may fit with hers.

I also spin plates with other three girls so i think that is enough for me.

These three girls are not horny, kind of my desired girl friend, not just

f-buddy.


And how do i make her jump to my hoops?

How do i ask her to figure out her schedule by not looking needy and desperate?

I mean if today i ask her what is your plan this evening

and she said she is busy and if i ask like this again tomorrow, is it

gonna sound desperate?

Should i tell her what we gonna do before asking about her plan?

 

[DonGorgon]

she is choosing to do everything except you.. busy = not interested in you..

 

[keemojung]

she is choosing to do everything except you.. busy = not interested in you..

well, then what should i do?

Is it possible that she might be in the process of figuring out whether im a good person who she can be with as a lover?

 

[Mick Chong]

Hi Guys,

This is my first post on this forum and I really look forward to some great advice from you guys. I'm a foreigner here in the Philippines and met one girl.

Following on from the theme of this thread, I met the girl at her place of work and I got talking with her and asked her out. She told me 'sure, some time.' After that when I phoned her, she told me 'she'd think about it.'

She's a westernized Filipino girl, but I'm struggling to understand her. I visit her at her work and she will usually come and talk to us (my friend and I) or me if I'm alone and have a drink. What gave me the impression she was interested was the following:

1) She usually looks quite happy to see me and comes over and sits directly next to me, not my friend, as if to signal, she's interested only in me.

2) She has dropped the odd hint saying, 'I need to sms you soon' (so we go out.)

3) She's chatted a lot with me and was telling me about her parents breaking up which is why she's 'cautious.'

However, the likelihood is this girl sees me as a 'friend figure' or maybe someone she might choose if something better doesn't come along. My reasons for this are as followed:

1) First time I got her number and rang her after, she told me 'she'd think about it'

2) She never comes out with me, always 'busy.' It's true she works very long hours, but there is always time to find 1 hour for a lunch?

3) I've seen her 8 to 10 times at her work over 3 months and despite always coming and having drink still she will not come out outside her work place.

4) She's westernized, drinks etc so dating is not a big issue.

5) She's pretty good looking and tells me many men approach her.

6) Never sends SMS or shows so much interest away from work.

Appreciate your feedback, I suspect she's wanting a friend or she's enjoying the fact that I want to be with her, thus is 'playing me' for her own entertainment purposes.

I'm not sure what the next step is. I'm thinking of cutting off all communication and not visit her anymore.

 

[PRMoon]

I try not to make the phone call to often and have a chitchat with her.

I gonna save those topic for our dating so that i can use my body language

to seduce her so that i won't fall into the friend zone.

What do u think abt this bro?

Holding off on communication too much might not be the best plan of action. Ideally when you talk to anyone you'd like to develop an ongoing relationship with you want to plant some seeds if interest and develop them further later. Leave them with something to think about after you're done talking get it? The more someone thinks about you the better off you are. You can expand on what you spoke on briefly at a later time but its essential to get the ball rolling.
Edit: that thumbs down was an accident. I'm not judging in any way, just advising.

 

[keemojung]

Holding off on communication too much might not be the best plan of action. Ideally when you talk to anyone you'd like to develop an ongoing relationship with you want to plant some seeds if interest and develop them further later. Leave them with something to think about after you're done talking get it? The more someone thinks about you the better off you are. You can expand on what you spoke on briefly at a later time but its essential to get the ball rolling.
Edit: that thumbs down was an accident. I'm not judging in any way, just advising.

So r u saying that i shouldn't call her too often, optimum would be 1-2 days

a call, and initiate some topics and talk abt it a lil bit and let her figure out

the rest?

What are some examples of those topics?

How do i plant the seed of interest?

 

[PRMoon]

Pick something interesting about yourself that makes you unique and interesting, nothing too nerdy (please use your better judgement). Most people have some pretty intriguing things under their belts that they just think of as normal. Don't rant about it buy just casually mention some things that make you you. After all you are looking to get her interested in your person so highlight those things. You can fish for points of interest get she has by asking her about herself but by no means should you let her do ALL the talking.

 

[Mantis Toboggan]

So r u saying that i shouldn't call her too often, optimum would be 1-2 days

a call, and initiate some topics and talk abt it a lil bit and let her figure out

the rest?

What are some examples of those topics?

How do i plant the seed of interest?

Read the DJ Bible, man. These are questions that show you haven't even invested any time in the site. But you expect people here to invest time answering basic questions.

You sound like a spaz, by the way. Loosen up. Dating is fun. It's like a video game. You win sometimes, you lose sometimes, but overall it has no major impact on your life.

 

[thevilittletroll]

unfortunately there's not much you can do at this point if she's too busy. all you can really do is ask her out on a specific date and say something like, "this is the only day i'm free all next week." if she's truly interested she will make some time for you. otherwise just assume she's not interested. getting her to meet you is just another compliance test.

 

[keemojung]

unfortunately there's not much you can do at this point if she's too busy. all you can really do is ask her out on a specific date and say something like, "this is the only day i'm free all next week." if she's truly interested she will make some time for you. otherwise just assume she's not interested. getting her to meet you is just another compliance test.

Then i will just keep casual contact and try to ask her out again.

What do u think between sending funny and teasing msg to seduce her

every 1-2 days and short phone call to flirt with her like 3-4 mins?

Which one is better in your opinion?

 

[Chamber36]

Then i will just keep casual contact and try to ask her out again.

What do u think between sending funny and teasing msg to seduce her

every 1-2 days and short phone call to flirt with her like 3-4 mins?

Which one is better in your opinion?

3-4 minute phone calls :rockon: