Burned Out G/F ?

[TxCowboy]

Recently, the g/f went out with me Th. night, stayed over Fri and Sat night and then went on a trip on July 3rd, and called it quits for evening. I met up at her place on july 4th and left late that afternoon.

I noticed that as the days went by, she stayed more at a distance from me. She told me that she wasnt ready to completely trust in me 100% and open up to me fully. She began to say that after I graduate this summer in August that it will probably be over and she was planning on heading up to another state to move in with her sisters sooner or later. I realize my mistake now - I burned both of us out and we lost a lot of that flare that is sparked at the beginning of a relationship.

She messaged me late monday night after I got home and asked me if I was "mad at her" and i called her back and said "no" and then cut the convo short . Here it is Tuesday and I cant figure out where to go from here .... I really like this girl and want to salvage this relationship to its fullest .... Any tips would be appreciated !

 

[Pimp-sicle]

The biggest lesson anyone can learn when they first get in to a serious LTR is to not rush it!!! Let it develop because that's the whole point of a LTR. I'm sure in the beginning you saw her a few times a week, hung out with your bros and kept your life pretty much the same. Well as time & feelings grew, you changed your routine. Started ditching the bros to hang out with your girl. You didn't realize it at the time, but everytime you chose her over your friends or anything else, you were helping the relationship get stale.

If you want to get her back, then slowly transition back to how things were before. Start seeing less of her, let her miss you because right now she feels like she sees too much of you and that's not good.

To be honest the fact that she said it will probably be over in August doesn't look to promising for you. I'd start going out with my friends and looking for new girls because this girl has done everything to let you know that she's over it.



PIMP

 

[TxCowboy]

Okay - will do! I guess , in the back of my mind, I was/am hoping that maybe I could take it up to the next level depending on where we're at at that point in August and see where things go from there. Im almost certain Ill land a job somewhere else and the only way we could keep it going would be for her to move with me.

Thanks, again ...

 

[snintel]

Originally posted by TxCowboy
Recently, the g/f went out with me Th. night, stayed over Fri and Sat night and then went on a trip on July 3rd, and called it quits for evening. I met up at her place on july 4th and left late that afternoon.

I noticed that as the days went by, she stayed more at a distance from me. She told me that she wasnt ready to completely trust in me 100% and open up to me fully. She began to say that after I graduate this summer in August that it will probably be over and she was planning on heading up to another state to move in with her sisters sooner or later. I realize my mistake now - I burned both of us out and we lost a lot of that flare that is sparked at the beginning of a relationship.

She messaged me late monday night after I got home and asked me if I was "mad at her" and i called her back and said "no" and then cut the convo short . Here it is Tuesday and I cant figure out where to go from here .... I really like this girl and want to salvage this relationship to its fullest .... Any tips would be appreciated !

You just let her unload all that on you and you just took it..... I would have siad "Alright then, bye" and walked out. But whatever, the keys here are simply overexposure & saturation. You saw each other way too much. I'd get tired of anyone if I was iwth them that long.

 

[themanwithnoname]

If she pulls, you pull.

 

[TxCowboy]

I guess its time to start interviewing other candidates while I await a call .... ?

 

[BADA-BING]

I would definantley go into search and find mode because it sounds like she done.

Whatever you do, don't go back and grovel or beg for her to reconsider, or start asking if she is gonna change her mind. Because once her Interest level hits a certain point, it will almost never return to where it was.

Just make it easier on BOTH of you and move on with "yourself" and your life.

 

[Junior Sanz]

yea man, get moving on the next one. looks like she lost total interest due to the hints shes throwing you.

the message she sent, "are you mad at me?" is just a lure to get you hooked.

what i would have done was not answer the message at all ..... THEN you would a saw a difference. automatic interest level shift.

 

[Funkopotamus]

Originally posted by BADA-BING
I would definantley go into search and find mode because it sounds like she done.


.

BADA is so right.

Find out what direction she is moving and you go the other way as fast as you can. If you are going to have ANYTHING with this one you need to break all contact now and see what happens.

DO NOT contact this girl.

 

[frivolousz21]

the games are over-rated..if the women is falling in love with you...it wont stop!


move on this girl doenst feel that way and it cant be done

 

[So pimp its scary]

Tx cowboy, did you say you were with her thur, frid, sat when she went home and you hung out with her july 4 as well...

You brought the shyt on yourself.

 

[TxCowboy]

UPDATE:
Mind yall that, I am 22 and she is almost 27

about 10:30 last night(day after july 4th), I get a text message that says :
"Did u 4 get about me? Thats cool" ,
I replied:
"I just didnt want to bother you"
She says
"From what? I didnt want to bother you"

I called her up and said I noticed some of her actions towards me this past weekend and I was just giving her some space .... and that i didnt want to bother her .... she then tells me
"Im just not use to a guy being this nice to me (Im not another hot-headed bad boy) and she was still uncertain about August, and that was all" She goes " You could have AT LEAST left a text or a message on my phone, and if you hadnt responded to my text messages, you would have heard a mouth full of lip tomorrow!!! "

I said " thats just how I was raised ... blah blah " and cut the convo....

She then texts me and says "did u still want to be with me? I want 2 still b with you. Let me know"

I call her back up and tell her "of course I do ... blah blah .... " and our tone of voice changes to a good one and we talk about the day....

I called her today (Wed) and we talked during our lunch break and had some laughs and discussed her to come over friday night ... Any thoughts ? Also , I dont know if this matters or not, but she is part Hispanic and her culture may affect some of these situations as well ....

 

[frivolousz21]

well

not that Im trying to act as if your screwed.


dont be nice..

be a sweet MAN.


2nd. she is 17 you are 22? do u live in the United States?

chances of this being a LTR are slim..and that makes chances of your heart being crushed HIGH.

if I were you.....I wouldnt do this..but I know you wont let this go.


u should date some other women...so ur attention is divided..until you reach a confident state where as the women you date cant resist you.

before you hurt urself

 

[So pimp its scary]

^^
agree... and yes she's 27 your 22

You don't even want to hear what we have to say, so I hope it doesn't hurt too much WHEN you get burnt... I'm gonna hate to tell you that I told you so.