"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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bulking up

JoeSchmoe05

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I'm 5'5'' and am 130 lbs. I have not worked out in two years and am starting over this summer and fall.

Last time I worked out consistenly was for 4 months, and I went to almost 140lbs. I did notice some differences... girls paid me more attention, my friends commented. Oddly, I never felt different and when I looked in the mirrior I didn't look better to me, but I guess its what other people see that counts. I stopped working out, probably because I didn't feel like it was worth it. Anyways, my workout at the time was rather flawed I feel. Didn't eat right, wasn't very consistent with what and when I worked out, etc. So I can't really look back at my results scientifically.

My question is, if I start following some of the advice hear and put together a solid diet and wrokout plan, what weight can I expect to be at in 3 months? And out of curiousity, how many inches does all that muscle add to say your chest circumfrence? I'm looking pretty small right now, but even when I was 'big' I looked small to me, I was never able to tell wether or not I was seeing any gains because I never seemed to bulk up, but again, other people took notice so something must have happened.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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semag

Master Don Juan
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take pictures of yourself... try to keep them simple. If you want an idea of how to do it, check this site:

www.johnstonefitness.com

After taking pictures, you can compare your progress, and REALLY see a difference, although during bulking it will be slight unless you go for about 6 months or so. However, since you see yourself every day, you won't see a change in yourself, and others will... because they haven't seen you every day.
 

Warboss Alex

Master Don Juan
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My question is, if I start following some of the advice hear and put together a solid diet and wrokout plan, what weight can I expect to be at in 3 months? And out of curiousity, how many inches does all that muscle add to say your chest circumfrence? I'm looking pretty small right now, but even when I was 'big' I looked small to me, I was never able to tell wether or not I was seeing any gains because I never seemed to bulk up, but again, other people took notice so something must have happened.
My friend, don't lose yourself in numbers. Does it matter whether your biceps are 16.2 or 16.4 inches? When you start putting on the muscle it'll be the overall picture which will improve, and no-one really cares about the maths!

How much weight etc you can gain, and where you gain is down to diet, genetics and training. If you have super genetics you could gain 30lbs, if you have average ones (like me and most other people) you could aim for 10-15lbs with the right diet etc. It's so individual it's impossible to tell - make a target and work your way there: your first port of call on leaving 130lbs should be 140lbs, make that your first target, and make sure it's as much lean muscle as possible!

While I don't advocate concentrating on one bodypart more than another unless you're advanced and want to bring up your weaknesses (in my view you're much better off training your whole body), good chest exercises are incline or decline barbell bench press, flat or incline dumb-bell bench press, weighted chest dips and flyes (flat or incline, opinion seems divided on these, granted they're more of an isolation exercise but they work pretty well for me) - and of course, all that fancy Hammer Strength stuff you can get over there in the US. :p

Semag is dead right (although results of bulking can be apparent in as little as two to three weeks, again it's very individual!) - Remember that YOU yourself will rarely see yourself as bigger because you look at yourself all the time - people around you will tell you when you grow! If you want to measure your own progress, then use a tape and measure your muscles, although like I said, listen to the mirror, not necessarily the numbers. Your chest might not grow an inch in three weeks of hard training and then grow two in the next three weeks. If you measured at the end of the first three, wouldn't you be disappointed? Patience mate!

Good luck!

PS - Post up your proposed workout and diet plan if you like, I'll be happy to give it the once-over.
 

EFFORT

Master Don Juan
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Originally posted by MindOverMatter
focus on your lifts and make them go up, and the body will follow.

i agree. Add weight every week to these lifts

Squat
Deadlift
Bench Press
Military Press
Pullups
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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