Crissco
Master Don Juan
http://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/building-rapport-in-detail-read-this-its-excellent--vt10179.html
This post will **** all over everything and anything you knew about rapport.
Ok guys rapport building is something I seem to be pretty good at and there are a lot of info I have lying around in my mind from either the pua materials, posts on forums and some more stuff from my NLP training. So this post is intended to go over almost every aspect of what rapport is, how to and so forth. If you can see any gaps in this post please inform me so I can fix it up and make this a pretty good overview of everything rapport/comfort/trust related.
Ok first of all I would just like to say, when the PUG’s talk about rapport they don’t know what the **** they’re talking about. As you will see later in the post they concentrate of building rapport purely through words (specifically commonalities), little do they know that your physiology and tonality matter more than words in the world of communicating. However that’s not to say those things don’t work, they do! This is just WAY better. I almost guarantee naturals and pugs are masters of rapport building, be it a conscious or unconscious thing. Remember rapport is a natural thing.
This is a long read, and there is a lot of info in here. This will improve your game some what, I’d say its worth the read.
What is rapport?
I think one mistake a lot of people make is they think rapport is comfort and trust building, but in fact it’s a completely different thing it’s a technique (the most powerful) to build that comfort and trust. Hopefully if you know what rapport is and I wont have to explain it in detail. Basically its a state you get into with another person or people in which your conversation will bounce around and conversation is practically unlimited and you are receptive to each other. Look at two really good friends and notice how their body language, tonality and speech are very different and more relaxed in comparison to the conversation of two businessmen. Basically rapport is the process of entering another persons frame of the world, it established trust and general acceptance of suggestions.
Establishing rapport:
Rapport can happen naturally, it happens all the time, once commonalities are formed and more time spent with each other people will naturally fall into to rapport with each other. One of the most important core things in pick up and any sort of seduction, motivation etc is that rapport CAN BE MANIPULATED, very easily. Manipulation comes off modeling people in rapport. And understand what makes up rapport and how its communicated. The MAIN 3 ways of communication come from 3 things. Each having a different value in how much info is communicated through them.
• Body Language, more specifically Physiology (55%)
• Tonality (38%)
• Words (7%)
Everything you ever do to manipulate rapport is project or read through these three sources. So be aware of what they are and how to manipulate (Will get to that later!) For now just know that your Physiology is the greatest communicator of information from one person to another, now you know you can concentrate on that for whatever aspect of your game.
In NLP the process of rapport runs on four things aimed to establish similarity and reducing differences.
• Pacing
• Mirroring
• Matching
• Leading
Initially you want to pace them, you pace them by mirroring their BL/tone/words now you don’t need to mimic just mirror, to what degree is up to you, experiment. Just remember just like in pick up in general you have to attract (pace and mirror) before you can get to comfort trust building (matching) and only then can you go for the f-close (leading). So you pace, and mirror things from them then you will be matching, once your matching you can slowly start to lead (PMML). Say you two are sitting laid back chatting on a couch, and you move onto a more energetic conversation and you sit up straight, if she is in good rapport with you and you have pace, mirrored, matched and now lead. She should follow suit in some way or another (she may not sit up like you but alertness, breathing rate, leaning in etc) may change.
Establishing rapport through Physiology:
Now that ive told you what to do PMML, you only need to know what things to look out for in your and her physiology. If your still at the point in your game where your mind is racing with what to do? Or What routine? Don’t. I feel if you can do the body language and create rapport that’s 55% of the battle instead of the rapport you could possibly create through your words (only 7%) logic then shouts that master the body language first! So things to check with physiology are:
Posture – How is she sitting? What position is her head in, things like that. Again how detailed you want to go into this is up to you.
Gestures – What are the common hand, face, arm gestures she makes? Start to identify them and PMML. Also next time you are in what ever state you enjoy (say excitement) remember what gestures you used, so when you want to lead later on you can get her to start feeling excitement by her natural tendency to follow you when you are in rapport.
Facial expression – Again its always up to you how much you want to mirror these things, just be aware of it. Eye movement and blinking come under this category. If you notice she blinks a lot, blink a lot too! It will speed up the rapport.
Breathing Rhythms – Probably the hardest to mirror, you ever find yourself sleeping in the same bed as a woman and notice that your breathing rates are in unison? That’s rapport. This is possibly the strongest one, if you can lead her to change her breathing rate you can make her feel what ever state you want, be it excitement, relaxed or even horney.
Its important to know though that changing your physiology can change what state you are in. So say your laying back and your breathing is slow, your body will start to put you in the relaxed state. Where as if you sitting up straight and you breathing fast you will become more alert/nervous whatever. Next time you catch yourself in a state you want to have take note of how your breathing/standing/sitting etc. This is the basis of speed seduction, I for one am not versed in Speed seduction. So far rapport manipulation for me doesn’t fall into the zone of ‘unethical’ since it happens naturally all over the world to every single person in the world. Be mindful of your physiology next time you find yourself in a state of your choice and notice how you breath and sit and what not. Its pretty cool when you know you have COMPLETE control of all your emotions. I barely ever get angry now since I know what physiology makes me that way. Its very powerful for just general peace of mind, come from work and you exactly how to make yourself feel relaxed. You can pump yourself up etc.
Establishing Rapport through Tonality:
This is the second most important thing to master after physiology (38%) you will notice that all of these things from PMML and your physiology, tonality all happen naturally anyway, so don’t worry too much if your over-thinking these things will sort themselves out with time (a trust and comfort builder) In fact often I will forget about tonality and be totally concentrated on physiology, it doesn’t matter though because 99% of the world cant even create the rapport you can create as fast as you can, so its cool if you’re a little sloppy. So the Tonality things are:
Tone: - This is your pitch, I rarely bother to go into this much detail in mirroring but if she is particularly ‘toney’ I will. Generally a lower pitch is more seductive tone that will help get them to comply to your wishes, but if you stirring excitement raise the pitch etc.
Tempo: - General rule across the world of seduction is keep it slow. Again though feel free to play with her, slower tempo will convey relaxed state, get her to slow down.
Timbre: - This is the quality of your voice. This is not particularly useful in the rapport sense but it is extremely useful in attraction since a good timbre of voice is a signal of high amounts of testosterone and general manliness, perfect for amoging and general female to male attraction!
Volume: - Use your brains here, you can impact so many different thing by playing with your volume. Opening we all know you have to be loud, but you can lead her to feel a more intimate state by lowering your volume, say when you have her isolated. You should get the point now on how to use this stuff!
This post will **** all over everything and anything you knew about rapport.
Ok guys rapport building is something I seem to be pretty good at and there are a lot of info I have lying around in my mind from either the pua materials, posts on forums and some more stuff from my NLP training. So this post is intended to go over almost every aspect of what rapport is, how to and so forth. If you can see any gaps in this post please inform me so I can fix it up and make this a pretty good overview of everything rapport/comfort/trust related.
Ok first of all I would just like to say, when the PUG’s talk about rapport they don’t know what the **** they’re talking about. As you will see later in the post they concentrate of building rapport purely through words (specifically commonalities), little do they know that your physiology and tonality matter more than words in the world of communicating. However that’s not to say those things don’t work, they do! This is just WAY better. I almost guarantee naturals and pugs are masters of rapport building, be it a conscious or unconscious thing. Remember rapport is a natural thing.
This is a long read, and there is a lot of info in here. This will improve your game some what, I’d say its worth the read.
What is rapport?
I think one mistake a lot of people make is they think rapport is comfort and trust building, but in fact it’s a completely different thing it’s a technique (the most powerful) to build that comfort and trust. Hopefully if you know what rapport is and I wont have to explain it in detail. Basically its a state you get into with another person or people in which your conversation will bounce around and conversation is practically unlimited and you are receptive to each other. Look at two really good friends and notice how their body language, tonality and speech are very different and more relaxed in comparison to the conversation of two businessmen. Basically rapport is the process of entering another persons frame of the world, it established trust and general acceptance of suggestions.
Establishing rapport:
Rapport can happen naturally, it happens all the time, once commonalities are formed and more time spent with each other people will naturally fall into to rapport with each other. One of the most important core things in pick up and any sort of seduction, motivation etc is that rapport CAN BE MANIPULATED, very easily. Manipulation comes off modeling people in rapport. And understand what makes up rapport and how its communicated. The MAIN 3 ways of communication come from 3 things. Each having a different value in how much info is communicated through them.
• Body Language, more specifically Physiology (55%)
• Tonality (38%)
• Words (7%)
Everything you ever do to manipulate rapport is project or read through these three sources. So be aware of what they are and how to manipulate (Will get to that later!) For now just know that your Physiology is the greatest communicator of information from one person to another, now you know you can concentrate on that for whatever aspect of your game.
In NLP the process of rapport runs on four things aimed to establish similarity and reducing differences.
• Pacing
• Mirroring
• Matching
• Leading
Initially you want to pace them, you pace them by mirroring their BL/tone/words now you don’t need to mimic just mirror, to what degree is up to you, experiment. Just remember just like in pick up in general you have to attract (pace and mirror) before you can get to comfort trust building (matching) and only then can you go for the f-close (leading). So you pace, and mirror things from them then you will be matching, once your matching you can slowly start to lead (PMML). Say you two are sitting laid back chatting on a couch, and you move onto a more energetic conversation and you sit up straight, if she is in good rapport with you and you have pace, mirrored, matched and now lead. She should follow suit in some way or another (she may not sit up like you but alertness, breathing rate, leaning in etc) may change.
Establishing rapport through Physiology:
Now that ive told you what to do PMML, you only need to know what things to look out for in your and her physiology. If your still at the point in your game where your mind is racing with what to do? Or What routine? Don’t. I feel if you can do the body language and create rapport that’s 55% of the battle instead of the rapport you could possibly create through your words (only 7%) logic then shouts that master the body language first! So things to check with physiology are:
Posture – How is she sitting? What position is her head in, things like that. Again how detailed you want to go into this is up to you.
Gestures – What are the common hand, face, arm gestures she makes? Start to identify them and PMML. Also next time you are in what ever state you enjoy (say excitement) remember what gestures you used, so when you want to lead later on you can get her to start feeling excitement by her natural tendency to follow you when you are in rapport.
Facial expression – Again its always up to you how much you want to mirror these things, just be aware of it. Eye movement and blinking come under this category. If you notice she blinks a lot, blink a lot too! It will speed up the rapport.
Breathing Rhythms – Probably the hardest to mirror, you ever find yourself sleeping in the same bed as a woman and notice that your breathing rates are in unison? That’s rapport. This is possibly the strongest one, if you can lead her to change her breathing rate you can make her feel what ever state you want, be it excitement, relaxed or even horney.
Its important to know though that changing your physiology can change what state you are in. So say your laying back and your breathing is slow, your body will start to put you in the relaxed state. Where as if you sitting up straight and you breathing fast you will become more alert/nervous whatever. Next time you catch yourself in a state you want to have take note of how your breathing/standing/sitting etc. This is the basis of speed seduction, I for one am not versed in Speed seduction. So far rapport manipulation for me doesn’t fall into the zone of ‘unethical’ since it happens naturally all over the world to every single person in the world. Be mindful of your physiology next time you find yourself in a state of your choice and notice how you breath and sit and what not. Its pretty cool when you know you have COMPLETE control of all your emotions. I barely ever get angry now since I know what physiology makes me that way. Its very powerful for just general peace of mind, come from work and you exactly how to make yourself feel relaxed. You can pump yourself up etc.
Establishing Rapport through Tonality:
This is the second most important thing to master after physiology (38%) you will notice that all of these things from PMML and your physiology, tonality all happen naturally anyway, so don’t worry too much if your over-thinking these things will sort themselves out with time (a trust and comfort builder) In fact often I will forget about tonality and be totally concentrated on physiology, it doesn’t matter though because 99% of the world cant even create the rapport you can create as fast as you can, so its cool if you’re a little sloppy. So the Tonality things are:
Tone: - This is your pitch, I rarely bother to go into this much detail in mirroring but if she is particularly ‘toney’ I will. Generally a lower pitch is more seductive tone that will help get them to comply to your wishes, but if you stirring excitement raise the pitch etc.
Tempo: - General rule across the world of seduction is keep it slow. Again though feel free to play with her, slower tempo will convey relaxed state, get her to slow down.
Timbre: - This is the quality of your voice. This is not particularly useful in the rapport sense but it is extremely useful in attraction since a good timbre of voice is a signal of high amounts of testosterone and general manliness, perfect for amoging and general female to male attraction!
Volume: - Use your brains here, you can impact so many different thing by playing with your volume. Opening we all know you have to be loud, but you can lead her to feel a more intimate state by lowering your volume, say when you have her isolated. You should get the point now on how to use this stuff!
