"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Bringing her friends along?

ChocolateVanilla

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 5, 2007
Messages
66
Reaction score
0
This is the first time I've encountered this, but a girl I recently approached agreed to go out with me (at least I thought I made it clear that it was a date) but she ended up bringing a friend along and asked me if it was okay for her to come. I said "yes" (what else could I say?) and then actually called a friend who was driving around in the neighborhood so he could be a wingman for me. Overall, the "date" went okay, but I can't get a good read on her interest level. In the first meeting she seemed interested and gave me her number and agreed to go out with me, then she brings a friend along? I got a good amount of kino in which she responded well too but she didn't maintain eye contact with me(mainly fleeting but it also seems like she likes to look away when she's thinking of a response) and even crossed her arms when we were walking out and I was talking with her. She did smile/laugh at my jokes/c+f whenever I could isolate her Overall, I'm a bit confused as to how I should proceed. I though it was a date but I'm assuming she didn't interpret it as such. Also, she is the quiet/shy type from what I've seen so perhaps that played into it. So what advice do you guys have to give?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Snow Plowman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 18, 2006
Messages
1,229
Reaction score
39
Location
NY
Cool guys don't go on dates, they hangout. If its a hangout then there is no reason why she can't bring a friend or you bring a friend, because ultimately your hanging out. Get out of the social frame of "Were on a date".

Her bringing her friends should be no big deal because its not even that serious your just hanging out.
 

Effington

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 26, 2007
Messages
627
Reaction score
4
I definitely think you're overanalyzing the situation here. She obviously wasn't comfortable enough with you to go out solo this time, see what happens the next time you talk to her though.
 

xdreamz

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 24, 2006
Messages
545
Reaction score
10
it is a bit confusing on how women act and reading them. my advice is to not worry about it just proceed gaming her. she can decide to bring her friend along, she can decide to mention her boyfriend it's not under your control.

i can understand maybe due to lack of experience you didnt know how to handle it but it's actually your preference if you want the friend or not to come. usually from my experience i prefer not to have others come along but if she does its just as good if not better, its basically a barrier she holds in front of you. kind of like a "test"...

you want to turn it into your advantage, since you obviously are very attracted to her. try staring at her like you deeply desire her while everyones just talking. staying aloof and detatched while giving her those 'i want to make love to you' eyes will most likely switch those hot buttons. in the end try staying distant and cold this will all add tension and mystery which will have her CHASING after you.

i gtg for now
 

Bvbidd

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 16, 2006
Messages
1,482
Reaction score
8
Bringing her friends is WAY better than a date. On a date, she'll be in a creeped out mode the whole time and worried about what to think about you. Talk about flaking. But when bringing friends, she'll feel better, and not only that.. getting her friends to like increases your chances of hooking up by a thousand.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

I.A.F.Y.B.

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 18, 2007
Messages
2,051
Reaction score
21
Location
USA
Bvbidd said:
Bringing her friends is WAY better than a date. On a date, she'll be in a creeped out mode the whole time and worried about what to think about you. Talk about flaking. But when bringing friends, she'll feel better, and not only that.. getting her friends to like increases your chances of hooking up by a thousand.
I was about to say the same thing.

Now, since her friend met you and she got to know you a little bit more. The next date she will feel more comfortable being 1 on 1 with you.
 

Snow Plowman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 18, 2006
Messages
1,229
Reaction score
39
Location
NY
LJC said:
No offense, man, but if cool guys let women bring another guy into the mix because they're "just hanging out", well.....

Forget about the word "date". Call it "mutually agreed isolation" if makes you feel any better. The point here is that if you allow a woman to call the shots like this, all of your hanging out isn't going to accomplish sh*t.

Just call her on it. If she doesn't go along, well, you save yourself the trouble of trying to figure it all out. She'll let you know straight up and you can move on. Don't waste your time.

Sometimes it's better to know you can't win them all....
lol, I see what your saying, its just I'm saying if it comes up no need to call her out on it because either way you can always go talk to some other chicks because you have that abundant mentality.

Whether her friend comes along or not, you can still pair off at the end of the day and lay her. All you have to do is just treat the day2 like any other 2set. A good way to learn to manage that is to hang with a group of girls.

Reason I stated it the way I did was because say a chick wants to meet up with you on like a friday or saturday, your not going to cancel having fun with the boys and interacting with newer chicks to go on a "Traditional Date". If anything you'd do a win/win situation by inviting her to the club with your friends and that way you can get some #s and you know you have a chick you'll end up f-closing at the end of the night.

Its just usually guys think its automatically over because the girl brought her friend which isn't really the case, heck you can even bust on her for it.
 

Play the Game

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 5, 2007
Messages
680
Reaction score
6
Location
Nirvana
It seems to me that this whole idea of her bringing her friend along is just a power game and it works b/c well what are you going to do? Be a desperate chump and say no, i only want to be with you!!! Hell no. But what if you decide to go... then well you can attempt to maneuver the minefield of **** tests and jealousy that her friend might throw at you to prove you're a jerk or a loser. Best case you become one of the girls talking about some girly stuff. Remember there's two of them, so they'll decide what they want to do not you. Unless you're gay, you're going to become a third wheel at some point during the night. I think the only option left is to bail. Push the eject button and let them have their "girls nite out" while you call up your friends. I think you CAN go... but it's really detrimental to her interest level, your status and just plain castration IMHO.

The only exception to the rule would be if she has some ugly friend who's lonely and pestering her to come with. Then you get one of your good buddies to help you out. You'll owe him BIG time. lol
 

Phyzzle

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 19, 2006
Messages
1,963
Reaction score
35
I probably would have said "no".

It's not a bad thing to just hang with one friend on the first get together - if your first meeting was short or you met her online. But with your luck, it probably means she's going pull this load of sh!t:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=130308

My situation was bad, too. Once a girl didn't ask, just showed up with a friend, a male friend. I said I didn't remember inviting him.
 

Play the Game

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 5, 2007
Messages
680
Reaction score
6
Location
Nirvana
Phyzzle said:
Once a girl didn't ask, just showed up with a friend, a male friend. I said I didn't remember inviting him.

Ouch.... a guy? now that's cold hearted, you must have been REALLLLY nice to her.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

ChocolateVanilla

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 5, 2007
Messages
66
Reaction score
0
Play the Game said:
It seems to me that this whole idea of her bringing her friend along is just a power game and it works b/c well what are you going to do? Be a desperate chump and say no, i only want to be with you!!! Hell no. But what if you decide to go... then well you can attempt to maneuver the minefield of **** tests and jealousy that her friend might throw at you to prove you're a jerk or a loser. Best case you become one of the girls talking about some girly stuff. Remember there's two of them, so they'll decide what they want to do not you. Unless you're gay, you're going to become a third wheel at some point during the night. I think the only option left is to bail. Push the eject button and let them have their "girls nite out" while you call up your friends. I think you CAN go... but it's really detrimental to her interest level, your status and just plain castration IMHO.

The only exception to the rule would be if she has some ugly friend who's lonely and pestering her to come with. Then you get one of your good buddies to help you out. You'll owe him BIG time. lol
No, it wasn't me and two girls, it was me and my friend and 2 girls so the 4 of us. I thought I mentioned that in my first post. I do owe him one lol.

Today, I asked her if she wanted to go hang out again alone and this time she said she's never gone out with a guy before and she's not used to it and she'd rather be friends first before doing anything......


I mean she's interested enough to give me her number, agree to go hang out with me, then magically brings her friend along, and now she wants to be friends "first"? I don't know how to handle this one lol.
 

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,546
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
I at first glance thought this thread said "banging her friends".. but it says bringing her friends..s o therefore it's no fun anymore
 

MooseGod

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 12, 2007
Messages
785
Reaction score
11
Location
The Paradise City where the grass is green and the
I don't see anything wrong with her making it a "double-date" to borrow from 50's terminology... Puts everybody more at ease, and if she has any class at all you won't be getting any on the 1st date anyway... IMHO.
 

Christian Troy

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 4, 2007
Messages
11
Reaction score
0
Location
the beach
Bvbidd said:
Bringing her friends is WAY better than a date. On a date, she'll be in a creeped out mode the whole time and worried about what to think about you. Talk about flaking. But when bringing friends, she'll feel better, and not only that.. getting her friends to like increases your chances of hooking up by a thousand.
yep...game her friend...huge opp. for a jealousy plotline.
 
Top