"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Bring back cigarette ads!

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Deep Dish

Master Don Juan
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Tobacco rates have precipitously plummeted in the past two decades. In fact, there are now more teenagers who smoke pot than smoke.

The restrictions on advertisements, along with better education, public health campaigns, sin taxes, warning labels, and bans on smoking in public, are prescisely why “Nobody smokes three packs a day anymore.” You can’t prohibit drugs, for philosophical and pragmatic reasons, but you can craft regulations to make a product available to those who seek it out, while simultaneously not actively encouraging use, balancing libertarian principle with public health. Advertising restrictions don’t interfere with your ability to act on your decision, you can still walk into a store and buy it.
 

twentee

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ANY inhalation of smoke is stupid, moron. No other species on this planet is stupid enough to do that. Chimps can be TRAINED to do it, but idiots do it on their own. Wow.
 

Darth

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I predict a massive uptick in smoking within the next 2 years.
 

Deep Dish

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Oh really? Why? I keep shaking my magic 8-ball and the best answer I can get is “Reply hazy, try again.”

By now predicting a massive uptick, you’ve destroyed your own argument. If a massive uptick is destined for the near future, why would it be a good idea to lift advertising restrictions? It’s rare to see someone argue in favor of Big Tobacco to pillage profits from disease. If anything if going to happen in the next two years, smoking rates in Washington and Colorado are going to start dropping at a faster rate than the national average, since tobacco doesn’t stand a chance against pot, and there will be more legal pot after the 2016 election, in three years. Smoking pot is most definitely not a gateway to tobacco, but an exit drug away from it.

Do you want to place a wager? I accept credit cards!
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Down Low

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Deep Dish, didn't you recommend adding Lorillard (LO) to one's portfolio, since tobacco stocks are soaring?
 

Deep Dish

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Of course not.

I don’t pay attention to the stock market, but I see tobacco stocks are rallying because of a court ruling ruled against explicitly graphic warning labels. To the best of my knowledge, those warning labels were proposed but not yet implemented, so the warning labels will remain the same as now. Since the warning labels were never implemented, the consumer experience remains the same and won’t cause a big spike in use. I don’t see what’s your point in relation to my points.
 
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