"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Bring a date?

Magma

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I got invited to a house warming party this Saturday night for my friend and his fiance, and am on the fence about whether or not I want to bring a date. My buddy's fiance is bringing some co-workers from her restaurant, and these are women that I've never met. This is an opportunity to expand my social circle as I see it. Besides, she said she has a few co-workers that need to get fukked.

On the one side, bringing a date would give me a little social proof. On the other hand, it seems kind of like "bringing sand to the beach" as it were. It's not a big deal, but I do have a few options about who I could bring.

Thoughts?
 
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"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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edger

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It's sort of a difficult call I think. I say bring a chick with you. As you even acknowledge, your chances of your friends fiance's friends "wanting" you will increase. But at the same time, they probably won't try to engage in much conversation with you and you probably won't try to engage in much conversation with them(unless you don't give a f*ck..and even if you did engage in conversation with them, it would be hard to number close; they'd probably be reluctant to it since another woman is right there with you) because you're with another chick, hence not allowing you to build attraction. But like I said, bring a b*tch with you(a HOT one of course), and hopefully your friends fiance's friends will want to meet you again.
 

KarmaSutra

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This is quite the conundrum. On one hand you have an opportunity to reach out and touch some other prospects with unfettered attention. One the other you have a chick, who I presume is mildly attractive and conversational, who will immediately jump your social status.

You need to igure out which is more important and the length of time of importance. Are you looking for long term friends or short term trim?
 

Latinoman

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A date? You don't need social proof...you ALREADY have the social proof by the fact you were invited by the home owners. Go alone dude...and hunt.
 

Magma

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KarmaSutra said:
This is quite the conundrum. On one hand you have an opportunity to reach out and touch some other prospects with unfettered attention. One the other you have a chick, who I presume is mildly attractive and conversational, who will immediately jump your social status.

You need to igure out which is more important and the length of time of importance. Are you looking for long term friends or short term trim?
Aye. Of my date options, I would rate them 7 collectively. Nothing to call home about, but I wouldn't kick any of them out of bed for eating crackers. I would post odds of 2-1 in fukking any of them. So I have THAT to think about. I just can't realistically post odds of banging any of these other women though, since my information is limited. Again, I was told that a couple of them needed to get stuffed. However, there was the conspicuous failure to mention the looks of these woman. Hmmm. I just got out of a LTR relationship a month and a half ago, and am definitely looking for the short term trim.

I really think this one could go either way, guys. Like I said, not a big deal by any stretch of the imagination. Just wonderin'...
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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jophil28

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Magma said:
... My buddy's fiance is bringing some co-workers from her restaurant, and these are women that I've never met.
You can take this to the bank - your bud's fiance has already had several conversations with her co-workers about YOU. You will arrive with pre-publicity . You do not need socail proof, you already have it thanks to the jabbering of those women in the cafeteria. GO get yourself one and if you do it right you can set them up to compete for you.
 

Magma

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What if they're fat hags? I mean, my buddy's fiance is hot, but that does not guarantee the level of the friends/co-workers. It really is an interesting question, now that I think about it...

Take a 2-1 shot on getting laid by a date, or gamble big and use the law of numbers to my benefit. Interesting...
 

edger

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Latinoman said:
you ALREADY have the social proof by the fact you were invited by the home owners.
You consider that good social proof? Wow, he got invited to a party. Anyone can get invited to a party. As far as it making him look more attractive to these women, I don't see the relevance.
 

Magma

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jophil28 said:
You can take this to the bank - your bud's fiance has already had several conversations with her co-workers about YOU. You will arrive with pre-publicity . You do not need socail proof, you already have it thanks to the jabbering of those women in the cafeteria. GO get yourself one and if you do it right you can set them up to compete for you.
You know, you bring up a good point. I fabricated and installed the concrete bar top for my buddy, and it's kind of a "house warming/put the bar to use" kind of party. So I'm sure she's told them about the sick fukking bar top I made. Never thought about that...hmm. That might tip the scales in favor of a solo sarge.
 

edger

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jophil28 said:
You can take this to the bank - your bud's fiance has already had several conversations with her co-workers about YOU. You will arrive with pre-publicity . You do not need socail proof, you already have it thanks to the jabbering of those women in the cafeteria.
"You can take it to the bank", lol. How do you know that? How do you know his buddy's fiance has talked good about him to these women? For all you know she could've told them she's not into him and doesn't find him appealing. If she told them that, then that's in most cases, a loss for him.
 
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"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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mzilla2

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Magma said:
What if they're fat hags? I mean, my buddy's fiance is hot, but that does not guarantee the level of the friends/co-workers.
Yes, that is a real risk, the vast majority of times I've had a chick describe her sister, friend, coworker, etc as "hot" they have turned out to be substantially less than that, in my opinion. The mechanism as to why is another topic. I have my theories.

I'm a big fan of hedging and plates - multiple options always put you on your best footing.:rockon:

I'd say bring your "7" date and get an eyeball. If you see something you like and get play, you can always # close discretely and evaluate post party. As well, the social proof aspect is very important - chicks infallibly will judge a man by whether other chicks want him, not their explicit attraction to him alone.
 

Luveno

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You're too concerned over your social appearance.

Who cares about social proof? It'll backfire if these girls are better looking than your date. Good looking girls are not jealous of ugly girls. They're jealous of girls who are better looking then them. You can't be sure...

Not only that, if these girls are ugly, then having that date really did nothing for you, unless you were planning on screwing the date afterwards, but you have booty call women set up for that kind of thing, don't you? You should.
 

jophil28

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You go alone because then you are free to hunt without some "date" hanging off you because you are the only person she knows.
I cannot believe some of the un-DJ comments here like "take a date because she is a sure f**k later " . That is how women behave - always doing the SAFE thing!
Your bud's fiance is inviting some co-workers - plural ! And there is just ONE of you. A NO brainer .
 

Latinoman

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edger said:
You consider that good social proof? Wow, he got invited to a party. Anyone can get invited to a party. As far as it making him look more attractive to these women, I don't see the relevance.
And you wonder why it take people multiple dates to get laid? And why people have to buy a fancy dinner for a first date?

I will tell you why...because they are WASTING their time.

Do not bring a "date". Go there and talk to women...and get them to know them at the hosts dime (they are paying for alcohol and food). That would save you time and money. You might even get laid too.

Social proof? You read to much “PUA” crap. You want social proof? Learn how to dance. Or learn how to lead an interesting conversation in a room full of strangers.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

edger

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Latinoman said:
Social proof? You read to much “PUA” crap.
It's not that I read too much Pick Up Artist material, it's how I've witnessed the fruits "Social Proof" bears, through MySpace. When I started to use MySpace as a portal for hooking up with women, I had NO hot women leaving me IOI's(Indicators of Interest) on my page, in my comments section. The hot ones that did leave me comments were my ex-girlfriend and one other chick..but by the time we broke up, I erased all her comments, and the other hottie that left me comments erased her profile, and along with that obviously, the comments she left me had disappeared as well. So by the time I started gaming women on MySpace, I had ZERO hot chix leaving me IOI's, except for a few unattractive ones. My game was good when sending out emails to random chix, but the problem was, I had no HOT women leaving me IOI's..and these women obviously noticed that(they notice everything, dumb b*tches don't miss a trick), which consequently killed my game.

Dabble into the MySpace thing one day(just to f*ck around) and you'll see what I'm talking about.

Not only can I speak from experience with MySpace, but also my own real life experiences as well.


Latinoman said:
You want social proof? Learn how to dance. Or learn how to lead an interesting conversation in a room full of strangers.
Dancing is one thing I do. It hasn't helped my game. And I dance pretty well.
 

Magma

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Update:

The party was a total fvcking dud. First off, none of the women were even REMOTELY attractive in any stretch of the imagination. Second of all, they didn't show up until midnight because they all had just gotten off work at the restaurant. Fat hags. Every single one. One of the hags got pissed at me because I confused her with some other fat hag that worked at the restaurant. Jesus....

I am thinking, "This is what I signed up for?" I ignore the brutish hags and enjoy darts and shots. Next thing I know, it's three in the morning (no thanks to daylight savings) and I am surrounded by disgusting women. No date, no prospects, no booty call at that hour, nothing. FVCK!!! What is the deal with women that are 50 lbs overweight and think they are the shyte? It's disgusting. Makes me want to puke. 20/20 hindsight I 'spose.

The only positive that came out of tonight was that I acquired some future job contracts with the concrete bar tops. That's a good thing, but I'm still pissed...
 
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