Breaking up with my girl.

[HalfAddict]

I want to break up with this girl I've been seeing for four months, but Im worried about her wigging out.

She's clingy, trying to get me to meet her family, Says she's madly in love with me... She calls me every day and wants to come over everyday, sucking up all my time.

Not only that but I feel myself becoming annoyed when she talks.
I want to let her down easy but I think she's gonna latch on and try to make me change my mind... I can't just avoid her and ****.. Any advice?

 

[joekerr31]

hahaha.

now you know what women go through with AFCs.

not much you can do other than bite the bullet. simply tell her its not working for you and that you are breaking up with her.

she'll probably want answers and try and get you to change your mind. simply tell her that 'its nothing to do with you, I just think our relationship has run its course.' (haha, she'll know this is bullsh*t, but its the common excuse peopel give to breaking up)

if she tries to keep the conversation going simply say 'honestly, do you really want to be in a relationship with someone that no longer wants to be in the relationship?"

theres not much she can say to that other than to let you walk away.

whatever you do, be business like about it. don't let her being upset make you change your mind. just stick to your guns.

 

[MacAvoy]

I've never tried this but it just hit me. In the past I've heard guys say, just be an AFC and let her break up with you. But here's a new twist. Break her trust and let her break up with you.

Tell her you screwed up and had an affair, tell her your sorry and you want her forgiveness and that you won't let it happen again. I can guarantee she'll want some time and give it to her. If she takes you back, then you have a licence to cheat all you want, but in reality, the relationship will be forever broken and you won't have to worry about her being some psycho ex chasing you.

 

[thirdtimescharm]

if she tries to keep the conversation going simply say 'honestly, do you really want to be in a relationship with someone that no longer wants to be in the relationship?"

This is great advice. I was in a situation with a woman who was quite obsessed with me. she would alternate from emailing me 20 times a day in attempts to get me to "work" on the relationship, to then calling me every name in the book for ignoring her. Finally, I simply repeated back to her all the terrible things she said about me, and asked how could she want to be in a relationship with a person who you have such a horrible opinion about, and conversely, why on earth would I want to be in a relationship with you knowing the depth of your feelings.

That was the end of her pursuit.

 

[Mr.Speed]

i wouldn't call him an afc. she is just madly in love with him, which is in fact a good sign.

i know that girls act like this,when they really feel secure with a man and are sure,that they want him.

what strikes me here, is the fact that she hasn't forced him to move togehter with him, to live like an "engaged couple". my gf forced me to do this,but i strictly refused. i know how it feels like,when you have to give up your freedom, and this really sucks. trust me, you don't feel good with this and this relationship will not make you happy. unless you share exactly the same feelings for her and you want to be togehter with her every minute of your free time, in this case you should get engaged with her. but this not case here, so split up or suffer more.

i know.. you will miss the sex with her.. i know, i know. but as unbelievable it may sound sex is NOT everything, your freedom and happiness is more valuable

 

[Mr.Speed]

don't simulate an affair, this could backfire!!

she might want vengeance, depending on how you broke her heart.

just tell her,what joekerr31 said

 

[Mr.Positive]

Tell her you screwed up and had an affair, tell her your sorry and you want her forgiveness and that you won't let it happen again. I can guarantee she'll want some time and give it to her. If she takes you back, then you have a licence to cheat all you want, but in reality, the relationship will be forever broken and you won't have to worry about her being some psycho ex chasing you.

This is HORRIBLE advise...but funny. How about having some ethics here, I hope you were just joking MacAvoy.

Let me ask, what did this gal do wrong other than show very high interest level?

If you are going to break things off, be gentle, but upfront about it. I'd just tell her that you need to take a break.

 

[HalfAddict]

Well there is a few things,
Sometimes When she mentions children, I'll say, I never want to have kids... and she'll say never?

And I'll say never, I don't want em... So she says never!? Then I'll have to say.. I NEVER WANT KIDS. Which at this point she'll mention how she wants multiple children, then toss in a not now of course... But this shouldn't even be a conversation thats going on not even knowing this person an entire year yet.

Marriage is another thing she's tried hinting at... "if we ever got married I'd blah blah blah" Or "if we were married You wouldn't blah blah blah"

Of course I say marriage is broken, and I really think it is, and it would take a TON for me to get married ever!

She doesn't like my best friend.

She's really whiny if I ignore her in the slightest, or disagree with her.

I made a mistake getting into this relationship as it wasn't even two weeks from my previous.

I just really don't see her in MY future, it's not that I think she's a bad person, or hate her guts or anything.

 

[mintxx]

I've never tried this but it just hit me. In the past I've heard guys say, just be an AFC and let her break up with you. But here's a new twist. Break her trust and let her break up with you.

Tell her you screwed up and had an affair, tell her your sorry and you want her forgiveness and that you won't let it happen again. I can guarantee she'll want some time and give it to her. If she takes you back, then you have a licence to cheat all you want, but in reality, the relationship will be forever broken and you won't have to worry about her being some psycho ex chasing you.

that's pretty squalid man

 

[MacAvoy]

that's pretty squalid man

Thanks, thats the best compliment I've gotten in a while :rockon:

 

[penkitten]

mr halfaddict...
at 4 months into dating someone the big questions should be ..
"which band are we going to see on friday night?"
"your place or mine tonight?"
"can you make coffee on your way out?"
"what do you want on your half of the pizza?"

not
"how many kids do you want someday?"
"what kind of wedding do you want"

i think this is all coming way to fast from her.
4 months of a relationship is not really that much time to even find out if you like someone enough to love them, much less marry them and have babies with them.

 

[guru1000]

I've never tried this but it just hit me. In the past I've heard guys say, just be an AFC and let her break up with you. But here's a new twist. Break her trust and let her break up with you.

Tell her you screwed up and had an affair, tell her your sorry and you want her forgiveness and that you won't let it happen again. I can guarantee she'll want some time and give it to her. If she takes you back, then you have a licence to cheat all you want, but in reality, the relationship will be forever broken and you won't have to worry about her being some psycho ex chasing you.

Only one problem with this scenario,

When a girl is attracted to you , you can do everything WRONG and she will stick with you.

In contrast when a girl is not attracted to you and you do everything RIGHT, it wouldn't matter.