"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Breaking the rules

Cloud-uk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 1, 2003
Messages
699
Reaction score
1
Age
39
Location
SE England/ York
I've met a girl who is fine, great fun to talk to, and is just rocking my world at the moment.

Thing is find myself doing quite AFC things, like talking to her over the phone for a while almost every day, and I'm torn between staying a challenge, and talking to her- which i enjoy.

Hmmmm, I haven't played this one too well- she instigated the first make-out shesh (though that's obviously a pretty hench IL signal), and I feel it's been more a mutual control thing, I haven't taken the lead (yet).

Anyway, I see her at college and everything seems to be going great. Meh, you know what I'm talking about- it would suck if i smothered the spark by doing something daft. I don't know why i feel i should tone it down for a girl who excites me... Screw it, you have to know the rules to break them eh? Should I be concerned or not?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Lifeforce

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2003
Messages
2,091
Reaction score
18
Location
SWEDEN
I have messed up to many promising starts of relationships just because of the crappy DJ rules. Break them, and if you do a mistake, you will learn first hand instead. Most DJs are adept at getting a girl but below average in keeping them.
 

Skullcrusher

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 8, 2005
Messages
159
Reaction score
0
DJ Rules/Techniques work for the high school crowd where you can fool around with mental games, which is why there are continuing flood of high school morons who think gaming a women is equating to real life dating.

Oh I just checked out your age, you're still not in the real world yet.
 

PVSSY-EATER

Banned
Joined
Feb 16, 2005
Messages
590
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
Michigan
why kid it is not about rules or techniques or tactics, it is about what you feel about the woman. If you feel she is a good catch or would be a good relationship type, as long as you dont turn into an AFC, you will be find. What I mean by turning into an AFC, is by allowing her to walk over you and so on. Take things slow with her, dont start have feeelings yet, but if you cant help your feelings, then just dont turn to an AFC. That being in love feeling is only bad when you dont know how to control it, like nice guys do, and start over doing **** like buying her stuff and kissing ass. However, that being in love feeling is actually a good feeling, just control it and not turn AFC, and you will be fine bro.
 

Cloud-uk

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 1, 2003
Messages
699
Reaction score
1
Age
39
Location
SE England/ York
Great, I know I'm not being a doormat- far from it. I am of course just acting myself, joking about and things are going well. I was just a bit worried about killing off the challenge factor. This one is a keeper!

I appreciate the advice about just using your intuition PVSSYEATER, I just think that it's good to make sure the general gist of what you're doing is on track now and then. hey, the last time I just went with my intution with girls it told me that presents were the way forward! RIP AFC.

SkullCrusher, I go to a 6th form college which, I feel, is a pretty mature establishment. Unless of course you're sticking Uni life into the world of fakeness too. Which i guess is fair. Never the less, DJ 'mindgames' have never worked for me (over the last 2 years) so I'd rather keep going intuitively. Lol, I'm with you on the HS morons thing though: if we keep clicking this will be the first relationship (if you can call the others that) that didn't stem from me and a girl being drunk and in the same place.

I fuggin rock.

Edit: 2nd.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Top