"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Breaking NC to resolve mail issue?

rastapasta

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So I'm about a week and a half from 60 days NC with the exception of a few sightings around town, and about 3 months since I kicked her out.

Ain't gonna lie, it has been tough but that is all on me and my own messed up mental state as I should be feeling way better by now. Anyway, so about 2 weeks ago I learned she put a hold on my mail the previous month, since I received no business mail for a month! Almost broke NC but instead I went to the post office and had this taken off which was a whole process. Took all her mail and thew it in a bag in my closet.

Then yesterday I got some mail for her, I know this is her paycheck from her new job. Today I checked the USPS site and there is another hold on my mail (you can actually check this on the site). I know she probably did this so she can get the paycheck but don't get why she still uses my address when she won't even acknowledge me.

So now I can either go back to the post office and get the hold removed again (awkward and time consuming because I have to prove I live there and it was a whole thing last time with a cvnt postmaster) or I can just contact her, tell her to stop having mail sent, come pickup your mail when I am not home and immediately remove the hold. Was hoping to maintain NC forever though :cuss:
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Dhoulmagus

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Yall take this NC **** too seriously and I'm pretty sure it is because yall are using it in hoping of getting back with her.
 

way2smart

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I don't think she specifically placed a hold, to get her paycheck. If she wanted it, she would have called you.

Forget it, it's probably not a paycheck or she probably doesn't need it, since she haven't called you. And trust me when a chick knows you have her paycheck she will call you immediately.

Keep the NC. You are being delusional.
Okay i've read your posts in NC thread. You are definitely overthinking it.
Keep NC forever.
 

GS750

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Write "return to sender" on it and put it back in the mailbox
 

rastapasta

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I'm not delusional, I know exactly what it is. But yeah, probably overreacting. I think its best to just do nothing for now. Might do a RTS in a week.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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devilkingx2

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I think you might have to just tell her, to get her stuff(not from your place, send it to her or put it somewhere she can get it), stop putting holds on your mail, and that if she keeps sending her mail to you you'll throw it away


then go back to NC I guess.
 

rastapasta

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devilkingx2 said:
I think you might have to just tell her, to get her stuff(not from your place, send it to her or put it somewhere she can get it), stop putting holds on your mail, and that if she keeps sending her mail to you you'll throw it away


then go back to NC I guess.

Nah screw it, not breaking NC for this. No action is the best action and I wish I didn't have these types of overreactions in the moment. I really don't need my mail that bad anyway, my primary address is actually somewhere else and it will get released eventually. I'm going to RTS her crap tomorrow or Monday when I have time.

I've been abstaining from alcohol most of this month as my drinking hasn't done me any favors. But last night I got wasted and I think it was good for me. I just didn't care anymore, looked in the mirror and told myself I need to stop with all this self pity and sadness crap. Then I went and hung out with some friends at a few bars and kind of commiserated with another really good friend who I just found out is getting a divorce. We made plans to go to Vegas in a few months and celebrate.
 
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