Break up with a seemingly good girl?

[Atlasoh]

Unlike my last 4-yr relationship which ended several years ago, I don't feel I am really into my current 2-yr relationship. By many objective measures, my current girlfriend is better than prior exes. She is more attractive, intelligent, has a good career, very into me, good values, good family, cooks for me, the sex is good, fun/extroverted (I am more introverted), and without the pesky feminazi pseudo-logic bullcrap.

Despite all the positives, I feel if the relationship ended today, I would be perfectly fine. She knows this too. We also both know that other guys would date her happily, and yet, I have little to no jealousy about this fact. This lack of need bothers me somewhat. In the past, I was melancholic when my prior 2 relationships ended, so the current realization has been slightly unsettling.

Have others experienced this issue? I wonder if I'm getting too picky or just more into my own personal life and interests.

 

[Reykhel]

This lack of need should not bother you in the slightest!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This (perfect) frame of mind is NOT an indication of how happy you are in your current ltr

Your mindset is a mindset that all men should strive for and maintain with all women.

It shows a healthy detachment and a deep understand of the transient nature of all relationships.

Recognise it for what it is.

 

[searching solace]

You feel like this now but you don't know how you will feel once the reality changes and she is no longer there and seeing other guys.

I used to feel the same way in my past relationship - I became quite complacent and didn't care at all really - yet once she did actually leave for good, it certainly didn't feel nice.

Just a thought.

 

[Atlasoh]

I will also add that, as I have gotten older, I have come to increasingly value my work which can be very busy, personal interests, the gym, family and friends over women. Dating girls and the whole friends with benefits program eventually got boring, unless I thought the girl was significantly worth the time and effort after an initial global assessment. I met my current girlfriend in this setting.

I know with my first gf at age 18 I was an AFC, and that experienced changed me.

Thanks for your comments and I grossly agree with your points. I just wanted to make sure I was not being crazy. I went to the club with my guys last weekend, and for a brief moment I thought I had a decent girlfriend after making mental comparisons with the girls I met. I will just continue to enjoy the ride.

 

[sazc]

Im with @Reykhel - this was what I was thinking when I was reading your OP. She's being submissive to you (?) and you are ambivalent? Is she low drama? My theory is that, if there is no drama, artificial passion is not being generated. That push/pull and power struggle we sometimes deal with isn't occurring. This situation can be intoxicating and artificially generate passion. Depending on what you are looking for (permanent plate vs LTR) a low drama, low struggle, submissive partner relationship might be a good thing?

 

[Atlasoh]

Im with @Reykhel - this was what I was thinking when I was reading your OP. She's being submissive to you (?) and you are ambivalent? Is she low drama? My theory is that, if there is no drama, artificial passion is not being generated. That push/pull and power struggle we sometimes deal with isn't occurring. This situation can be intoxicating and artificially generate passion. Depending on what you are looking for (permanent plate vs LTR) a low drama, low struggle, submissive partner relationship might be a good thing?

She is low drama and submissive, which I prefer, although when I first met her she tried to test me.

 

[sazc]

right, so there is no real 'fight' with her. she's submitting to you (IMO) because she feels loyal to you and respects you. what you are experiencing, your ambivalence, probably has to do with the lack of artificial passion being generated. stability and consistency isnt as intoxicating as drama. just gotta figure out what you value.