break this down for me

[ThugLove]

Ok pimps, I needed advice on something, but first Ill give you some background

Im 24 (stil a virgin) so obvisuly my game aint super tight. I been trying to get at this chick (20 yr old) at work for 2 years

Last year even after light flirting with me, touching basic kino I tried to get at her- she said that we were just friends.

So I quit trying to get at her for a minute, because to me she was being an attention *****, giving you hints than shooting ya down.

Latly tho she been feeling me, always wanting me to take breaks with her, wants me to walk her home etc ( know big deal to you guys, but hey you got to start somewhere), Latly she been telling me im cute, funny and am the only guy she is talking to. Walked her home other night- spent 1 hour talking to her outside her place (she brought up the subject of kissing and said she only wants to do it with somebody she truly likes that it is nasty ) - but will also give me mixed signals, in example I she ask me Jokingly if i got plent of room in my house for her (staying at moms, have a real nice house) I grab her and she was like nah we just friends- than playfully hits me. she has sayd things b4 like I am her only guy friend (which i know is a big no no - not good)

she insist I take her number tonight and wants me to call her tommorow to go hang out with her ( she wanted to make sure I dident type in her actual name in my cell i and to use an alias for her)

so whats going on here, do I have a chance to get somewhere with her or Have I been placed in the friends category? Im a call her tommorow to go kick it but was curous on advice on what to try and if its a lost cause

 

[alphawolfx]

OMG STOP NOW!

accept it man...

she is just using you for the male attention in her life...

if you want to remain her friend, and just a friend, then do it

otherwise...
don't let her flirt with you
shoot her down everytime she flirts with you "um, no, it's okay" or "you can stay over but u have to sleep on the couch"

OR find a reason to get into a big argument with her about nothing important, but make it her fault (like forgetting to tell you something)

and then freeze her out for a few days, let her feel the flak, and then take it from there...

once you have a fight with a girl friend they get more emotionally connected to you

bascially for now, though, PULL BACK... if she flirts, do NOT respond at all. just look at her like "wtf are you doing" but don't SAY that, just convey it with your facial expression

 

[dearsappho]

I disagree...

Remaining emotionally detached is the only way to win this game. By making sure you are not affected by her games emotionally she cannot win.

Ive been here before, and chased a girl for 18 months before screwing her and then finding out she was a lesbian who screws men but doesnt have relationships with them. I was cut up at the time but learnt from my mistakes and now Im bomb proof.

Eliminate needyness and you'll be fine chasing her whilst seeing other women.

cest la vie!

 

[baracus]

Prediction: You will never get inside those panties.

Give it up. 2 years is a long time! Maybe girls just aren't for you. Try taking up chess or something.

 

[ThugLove]

Ok just wanted to update ya all on the situation , maybe get some insight

I called her up, I Went to the mall with her (and her 2 little sisters) via bus and kicked it for a few hours. I was flat broke so she paid for bus fare, food , drink. Had a pretty good time with her, little bit of kino. At one point when all the seats were taken she was like you can sit here pointing to her lap.

So basically the last week I been hanging out with her on all my breaks and walking home with her ( we get off at same time) she tells me she always has lots of fun when shes with me. We always be joking around - negative hitting each other.

So on valentines day we kick it tell about 11pm ( if sitting outside talking is considered kicking it) And when I was walking away she reached out to hug me , so I hugged her and gave her a kiss on the cheek. I think I might of surprised her because she said you kissed me! than she said thank you ( I think for hanging out with her all night)

So anyways I dont see her for a week since we aint working together, but just wanted to let ya all know whats up and if you think I can still pull her or just need to give up

peace

 

[Dapper Swindler]

Instead of waiting a week until you see her at work again, why don't you call her and set up, hmm, I don't know, maybe a DATE sooner?

 

[DeathDealer]

2 years passed. No, she's not into you.

You dig? Thug 4 Life, niggaz in da hood yo yo yo.

 

[ThugLove]

Okay I got played

Girl I been trying to holla at for 2 years basically indirectly dissed me

My homeboy happens to see her at a busstop and stops and says dont I know you from somewhere shes like ya your thugloves friend. Long story short she starts flirting with him and is looking for a pen to write down his number

so my homeboy calls me up and tells me about what happens says when my name got brought up she tried to act like I dident even excist than same tomething to the effect of we just friends.

Than Another one of my homeboys see's her all hugged up with some dude on the bus, and to top it off another homeboy scene her jump into some dudes car, giving him a hug n Sh*t talk to him for a min and get out , all this goes down the same week - same week i had asked her for a date and got a i am busy excuse

now obvous the girl aint feeling me like that that aint the problem

Problem is i dident listen to player supreme who said
dont try and mess with girls you work with .

I for real want to diss the hell out of her but that can only lead to me getting into trouble at work even if it only pays 10 bucks an hour I need my job. So when I now see her at work how do I approach this, continue to get led on and played and asked to spend all my break time with her. that aint me homie but if I act mad that can only lead to other people finding out and me risking a job

man I for real want to clown and diss but it may not be worth my job, how do you handle these situations?

 

[Mojo604]

wtf, man... Just ignore her at work, if shes all tryin to talk to you n**** just ignore the ***** and answer her questions with like one or two word answers.

Never initiate contact anymore.

 

[MacDiddy]

dude... maintain the frame that is getting you all this attention from her... MAINTAIN!!!!

 

[TizZle]

Do not give this woman anymore attention. She'll most likely wonder why, just tell her you have been busy. When she asks what you have been doing, just make something up that is humerous then cut the convo short. Cut her off. Women don't like sudden changes in one's actions. In the meantime, try finding some other girls.

 

[ThugLove]

Damn Sh*t has not been cool at work

Supreme - Not that it matters but im white, not indian, however I do remember talking to you on becomeaplayer.com

anyways I want to ask you guys if i looked immature with what I did

After I found out about this I scene the girl at work she was like what time you get off at , I said dont worry about it, she kept walking like okkkk

Girl than calls me up on her break for me to go with her ( we always take breaks together) I tell her im busy. (usally I always go with her) So I go outside 15 min later she still on break, I decide to not sit with her and sit at a table 2 tables away and talk to some co workers and totally ignore her

she was like wtf is your problem

I said you and continued to ignore her

We went back inside I continued to ignore her she than says what your angry because of your friend, than she says whatever dont talk to me again

next day she tries to start a conversation with me by saying your acting so ****ing stupid , ever since than we havent said a word to each other besides her friend coming up to me and telling me to quit being mean to her(whose also a manager)

2 days later I try to talk to her she blows me off , tells me not to talk to her again , puts up her hand like saying talk to the hand and walks off all the while avoiding me at all cost at work

Scene her a day later I said ewwww to her when I scene her and dident say anything else, she dident respond.

did I end this ok? I need to cut her off anyways and quit chasing but could cause trouble at work.

So basically I have lost a friend and also put me in a uncortable situation at work by the way I handled it.

 

[MacDiddy]

Didn't I tell you to maintain the frame!!!

You reacted like she was obligated to treat you with exclusivity for leading you on... Chicks lead guys on... thats what they do... A DJ would have known better...

I can't blame you for reacting the way you did as most guys would have done the same thing. You didn't feel like you wanted to interact with her... thats normal... however you got weak and started feeling sorry for her and then your offer of reconciliation gave her a chance to save face and blow you off for an ego boost...

I guess had you accepted her for the $lut she was when you found out, you could have come off better...

 

[ThugLove]

bump

 

[Wyldfire]

Sounds like you work where I do. There is a girl who works there who does this to guys all the time. She's an attention wh*re. You played it right by pi$$ing her off. You never would have gotten anywhere with her and the only thing that will affect her is to show her you don't want anything to do with her. Girls like this will act interested just to make you want her. Then when you act on her signals she just shoots you down. When you get discouraged and back off, she will step up the signals a notch to confuse you and make you try again...only to shoot you down again. The only way you can deal with girls like that is to simply not play her game. Don't respond at all to her flirting. Even on the virtually impossible chance of you getting anywhere with her...these girls are the absolute worst biotches to deal with anyway. You don't want anything to do with her.

 

[ThugLove]

Ok, Update to this girl I been trying to holler at for way to long

I hung out with her the other night after work, she kept telling me she wanted sex and wanted me to be the one to do it. Kept telling me to buy a condom over and over again ( I dident think she was that serious) so we went up to the park after work and she started giving me a message So I was like lets go back to my place.

We get there and I was kind of shy to make a move sitting on my bed, finally she says your so slow, gets up on top of me and leans down starts kissing me telling me this is gona be her first time(would have been mine to), again asking me If I have a condom. ( Again I tell her no), we upstairs and we dident want mom to here (im way to old to live at home I swear) So I took her hand and lead her down stairs we go down there start kissing and she just takes her shirt and bra off in no time ,So we getting into it a little bit I never tried to take her pants off in the next few minutes finally she says STOP. So i was like ok. she says This never happend and dont tell nobody, So I walked her home, she says the relationship stays the same that we just friends.

I see her at work a few days later we make a little small stop and she trying to act a little mad at me, I kept trying to talk to her and she put up her hand like talk to the hand leave me alone quit talking to me, so I was like why is you tripping. So finally when I get off she was taking her lunch I said so can I chill with you during your lunch she starts saying Do I have to , like she was still mad for whatever reason. So I just said Im just gona let you be mad and left

so what the hell happend here and what do i do?

 

[tmpgstx]

LOL! talk about an AW of the worst type. It's like thowing a Steak in front of a dog and then after it nibbles, taking it away .. lol.

This girl is BAD news. Don't talk to her anymore.

 

[HHloser2]

You deserve it, havent all the people here been telling you to not talk to her anymore?

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Dude, are you 24 or 12?? I knew the conclusion of your demised quest when you said "I have been after this girl for 2 years"

Quit talking to girls as a friend and taking work breahs with them and walking them home and going shopping and riding the bus with them etc etc....

Only approach a woman ronantically and if she shoots you down then move on - you would have saved 2 years of effort and false hope!!!

And yes, how you handled rejection was immature and made you look bad at work!!!

 

[CLOONEY]

Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
Dude, are you 24 or 12?? I knew the conclusion of your demised quest when you said "I have been after this girl for 2 years"

Quit talking to girls as a friend and taking work breahs with them and walking them home and going shopping and riding the bus with them etc etc....

Only approach a woman ronantically and if she shoots you down then move on - you would have saved 2 years of effort and false hope!!!

Very true. I dont waste more than 10 minutes on a girl if she wont give me her number and multiple dates. Man, some people still have so much to learn. At least you have come to the right place, move on from this girl and get yourself out socialising much much more! You obviously need to meet a hell of a lot more girls, and to meet the right one, I have found it takes about 50 dates per girl I would rate as "relationship material"!